5 comments about Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages.

1. I heard about this book from a relative who had read it. I didn't think that I would like it so I checked it out at the library. After reading through it over several weeks, I had to buy a copy of my own. There are some very helpful tips in this book. I have recommended it to several friends.



2. This is easy to read basic review of what ingredients need to be in a good, commited relationship. This book will not save a cracked relationship and will not prevent divorce. It is not about "how to" (speak to each other), but about "what" (the content of the conversations should be). I highly recommend it also to the people facing divorce, seeking for affirmation what the content of a relationship should be, what they have missed or couldn't get with the current partner they are splitting with.
   
   The excercises consist of a series of questions or better topics the partners need to discuss. As some questions might not be applicable to discuss or answer or you might find it completely uninteresting, most of suggestions are very interesting and important. The questions are not put up front to discuss who is right and who is wrong, but to make couples learn how to make compromises on important issues and accept each other's different points of view.
   
   In the ubiquitous gloryfing of the marriage ritual, many people have forgotten that the person they are marrying is more important than the color scale of your grand event. Havin second thoughts before the wedding? Read this! It will not destroy the relationship, but it will help you evaluate it. This book helps to prevent ignoring the right gut feelings. It is your companion and on your side. You don't need to consult a relative that probably wants to see you nicely dressed at your wedding and will not listen to your worries properly as the wedding preparations heaten up.
   
   Unfortunately, dr. Smith's writing contains some religious elements at times, which is not surprising given the fact she teaches as an adjunct professor at Eastern Baptist Theological Seminary. This might be disturbing to some, but my advise is to ignore it. Ironically, she is quoting Sartre (an atheist) at one occasion to support a bit of spiritualistic point of view. Referrals to God are, however, not the foundation of the book and can be overlooked if you posess a bit of a tolerance (and if you don't, better not get married). I believe dr. Smith's experiences from her practice are very valuable and the book is worth buying.
   
   I benefited from dr. Smith's positive encouragement to independent thinking for women. There is this gentle feministic touch that may empower women to look behind the farirytale role of stuffing themselves in a white dress for one single day, smiling for cameras until it hurts and then suffering entire life due to emotional or physical abuse just becase divorce is unacceptable.
   
   Apparently, we all bring some lies in front of the altar and the book helps you find yours as well.
   
   If you have a close friend who is getting married in a few months, consider this as a gift way in advance! I had some fun discussing the topics with my close friend (and at times bitching about men and life in general, hahaha).



3. I just finished reading the book and feel it provided some good lessons and a generally good read. I think the book is best suited for people who are not yet married or those who have had relationship trouble in the past that they would like to move on from.
   
   The book was a little long-winded in some ways but provided great scenarios from (what I assume to be) her clients from marriage counseling. That was what I liked most about the book. Instead of talking about imaginary scenarios and results, it provided real situations she had seen couples go through during conflict. This helped me visualize the situations of conflict in my own engagement and I felt able to relate to some of the people she mentioned, whom are people going through the typical things to cause conflict... Money, beliefs, past wounds, whether or not to have children..
   
   She discusses the reasons many conflicts arise, and how many conflicts are much deeper than the surface. For example, she writes about a couple who are fighting over how much the wife pampers her 23 year old son whom is out of the house (doing his laundry, stocking his fridge), and how the anger the husband felt was evoked by having it hard when he moved out and not having the support of his parents (as well as being raised to believe that a person should be able to take care of him/herself after moving out). The author also explains how to turn cycles of blame and anger into understanding, through use of mostly the technique of mirroring; repeating back what the other partner said to be sure that anger doesn't twist the other partner's words to cause misunderstanding or resentment.
   
   Honesty and maturity is a huge theme of this book. Looking past the flowery words and lovely dress, and thinking deeper about a marriage's future. Creating vows that really speak what you intend, instead of vows that have hidden intentions. (For example, saying that you will always 'be by your side' when you intend to go off on your own for days. Or perhaps saying that you will always be there for your partner, but only when they're considerate.)
   
   The intended audience for this book is women. This must be understood. Men can also benefit from this book but it is mostly an empowering book for women. It encourages women in bad relationships to have the courage to make change or realize that they deserve to be happy. It encourages people in good marriages to embrace each other and their current state of being, to look deeper into the disagreements that may arise so they can understand the background it is created by.
   
   Made me think more about how I feel about life and what creates my beliefs.
   
   The 'questions before marriage' weren't a big thing for me, because we already know almost everything listed about each other already. We were comfortable enough with each other that we discussed children, finances, religion, sexuality, politics, how to raise a kid, etc before we even got engaged. But it would be very valuable for most couples who may overlook important questions, or cringe at the thought of discussing deeply about beliefs (it's well worth doing).
   
   A good book for couples who want a healthy mature relationship free of the cycles of stress and blame that so many couples go through. Offers valuable advice.



4. was sent promply and the book was in VERy , well brand new shape. thanks



5. Simple stated, factual and sprinkled with personal anecdotes, this offers a great way to hold up a mirror to your present relationship and see if you are a good fit, both personally and together, before a trip to the altar, especially if you have any doubts.

5 comments about The Girlfriends' Guide to Surviving the First Year of Motherhood.

1. This book is amusing and light to read, but is only useful for BRAND-NEW mothers. I bought it mistakenly thinking there might be some interesting advice on older-baby topics, such as feeding solids, crawling, walking, etc. (I have a 7-month-old daughter). Unfortunately the bulk of the book deals with the newest of new-motherhood issues--losing your baby weight, how to care for your body in the immediate days after delivery, having sex for the first time post-delivery, breast v. bottle, etc. Only buy this if you are still pregnant, seriously.



2. I haven't read this book in a while since my kids are 4 and 2, but I will tell you that I did read it both times I had a newborn. I recommend this book to everyone, and buy it for everyone I can!
   
   If you don't have a sense of humor, or if you really are living the dream world with a husband who rubs your feet, gets up with the baby and doesn't want to play "Rock, Paper, Scissor" everytime you ask him to change a diaper DON'T READ THIS!!
   
   If you do live in reality, want the true story from someone who's lived it (4 times, Vicki has 4 kids), and don't won't take the whole thing too seriously then READ THIS BOOK!!!
   
   Enjoy, and Welcome to Motherhood!!!!



3. Best book ever to make you feel better when you feel sorry for yourself for staying at home



4. Iovine really hits on the way new moms can feel with this one. I read it about 3 weeks after my first baby and I was very pleased to humorously read about the same trials I was having. It also gave me a really good heads up for the coming months and I felt a lot more prepared for what was to come.



5. I found "A Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy" entertaining, so I bought this book after I'd had my first child. Not only does the author not base her childrearing philosophy on biology, psychology, or commone sense, but she ridicules people who do. She boasts about breastfeeding each of her kids less than the one before, which shows a basic lack of understanding of health issues. If you are looking for a humorous slant on infancy, then this might amuse you. If you are looking for a book to base your own parenting on, then don't.

5 comments about I Just Want My Kids to Be Happy! Why You Shouldn't Say It, Why You Shouldn't Think It, What You Should Embrace Instead.

1. Many parents confuse happiness with short-term pleasure. Instead of allowing their kids to work through unhappy times, they feel it's necessary to make sure kids never experience disappointment, sadness, and other unpleasant emotions. What parents don't realize is that those feelings help kids grow up to be emotionally mature adults.
   
   Just because your kids appear to be happy doesn't mean they really are. Kids try to please their parents, and you might be surprised to find they're wearing a smile because you've told them you just want them to be happy.
   
   If you're truly concerned about your child's long-term happiness, I'd encourage you to pick up a copy of this book. Both you and your kids will benefit from these suggestions.
   
   Reviewed by: Alice Berger
   Bergers Book Reviews



2. What? We shouldn't want our kids to be happy? Not really, say Aaron Cooper, Ph.D. & Eric Keitel, M.Ed. Instead of focusing on their being happy all the time (causing them to pretend to be happy when they really aren't), we should teach them to accept the full range of feelings so they can handle disappointment, fear, anger, etc.
   
   The authors say that this "...want them to be happy" mantra makes us captive to our kids' moods, feel guilt when they aren't happy, and prevents their learning to cope with adversity.
   
   As co-author of THE COMPLETE SINGLE FATHER, I've heard how single dads who often have their kids part time, every other weekend, or just on holidays, feel they need to make their kids happy to "prove" that they're still a good parent. No doubt single moms feel similarly.
   
   Rather than focusing on our kids being happy, we need to let them know that it's important to be healthy, caring, find meaning in their lives, have fine character, practice acts of loving kindness, and be spiritual.
   
   I JUST WANT MY KIDS TO BE HAPPY is a most unusual and thought provoking book. Whether you're a parent, grandparent, teacher, spiritual advisor, etc., this is a special book to open your mind to what really matters in your life and your children's lives and to prepare them for whatever life brings.
   
   I highly recommend this book.
   
   Elaine Fantle Shimberg
   ElainesBooks.com
   TheCompleteSingleFather.com



3. Helpful, insightful, and filled with great advice, "I Just Want My Kids To Be Happy!" is a book today's parents must read...While parents are more committed than ever to their children's happiness, kids today are more worried, more anxious, and more depressed--a fact the authors point out so well through the use of statistics and examples...If I could afford it, I would purchase a copy of this book for all expectant and new parents. It sheds light on how changes in the focus of what is important have created a society of children who aren't prepared for the realities of life..."I Just Want My Kids To Be Happy!: Why You Shouldn't Say It, Why You Shouldn't Think It, What You Should Embrace Instead" shows parents in an easy and helpful way how to bring up children who are truly happy, not ones who experience short-term pleasure at the expense of long-term happiness...I highly recommend this book to parents, grandparents, and caregivers everywhere!



4. This book could not have come at a better time. I was panic-stricken about getting my 15 month old daughter on the wait lists for all of the 'best' pre-schools in my area. I was writing checks, completing forms, filling out more paperwork than I did for graduate school. Why was I doing all this? So she would be happy, of course. As a new parent, I am guilty of saying 'all I want is for her to be happy' but with no thought as to what that means, or why I even say it. This book took my vague concept of happiness and helped me understand what 'authentic happiness' really is, and how to work toward acheiving it, not only for my daughter, but for me as a parent.
   
   I found it to be a very easy read, well-researched, and I really appreciated the fact that the book gave real-world examples on how to apply the theory into our busy parenting lives. I can't recommend this book enough, both as a parent and as a clinical social worker.
   
   I am certain I will refer to this book often as a guide to good parenting as my child grows older.



5. Almost every parent wishes happiness upon their children more than anything else. "I Just Want My Kids to Be Happy!: Why You Shouldn't Say It, Why You Shouldn't Think It, What You Should Embrace Instead" is a guide to help parents accomplish that goal and plant the seeds of the traits that bring happiness - the seeds of optimism, kindness, and more. A must for any parent striving to promote a good psychological future for their children, "I Just Want My Kids to Be Happy!: Why You Shouldn't Say It, Why You Shouldn't Think It, What You Should Embrace Instead" is highly recommended for community library parenting collections.

5 comments about I'm Not Your Friend, I'm Your Parent: Helping Your Children Set the Boundaries They Need...and Really Want.

1. If you are thinking about starting a family or all ready started, it's never too late to learn how to parent the right way. Yes, in this time of kids being spoiled rotten, it's no wonder why kids now days disrespect authority, this is happening because too many parents are " Friends " with their kids instead of being their parents. This is a must read for the next generation coming up.



2. I loved this books. It's jam-packed with practical tips, common sense advise, and wonderful quotes. I agree with another reviewer: it's time more parents learn how to be parents! Kudos to Ms. Hill for writing a book with such a great message and hope for parents.



3. DEFINITELY RECOMMEND TO ALL PARENTS. IT'S ABOUT TIME PARENTS TAKE
   RESPONSIBILITY AND STOP BEING FRIENDS TO THEIR CHILDREN, ESPECIALLY TEENS!!!



4. E.D. Hill hits the mark with this book. Every parent should be reading this book. It's a basic, common sense book on child rearing. Ms. Hill has a great sense of real values, this book is not for the politically correct, liberal minded, my kid can do anything they want crowd. This book is for parents who want to teach their children real values and a good work ethic.
   Good job E.D.
   Joe



5. Good read. Slowed down in value towards the end, but should be required reading for all of today's parents with children aged 5 to 20. If all the suggestions offered were followed we'd have have token misbehaving offspring.

5 comments about Choice Theory: A New Psychology of Personal Freedom.

1. This book is very interesting. It discusses a new way of thinking, that if used, could change the world. If you are interested in psychology, particularly reality therapy or choice theory, this is a must read.



2. It was hard to get into with the new terminology I was learning in the book but it does make sense. I would like to explore more of Dr. Glasser's books.



3. I have use this text to prepare to teach graduate level counseling internship courses. It is an easy read, but so full of useful information - don't let the ease of reading fool you! There is a lot of material to absorb, and the text presents the information in a helpful, clear manner that I can use with both my students and my clients.



4. I've tried reading this book several times, but always end up putting it down. The author strains the limits of my credulity when he states that so many health conditions from stomach aches to arthritis, are caused by the body's "creative systems" and that they are related directly to the breakdown of a personal relationship. Gimme a break, doc! This idea has been around for years, and has yet to be proven by science. This book is harmful!



5. this is a great book for those begining in the counseling field or those who like a serious framework to work with.

5 comments about Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline: The 7 Basic Skills for Turning Conflict into Cooperation.

1. A revelation.
   How do you handle your children's tantrums, conflicts, anger, bad behaviour, without damaging them.
   I am thankful to have found this book.
   Highly recommended



2. I originally purchased this book for one of my college courses. As I read it, I learned many new ways to handle discipline problems as well as dealing with my own anger and frustration that often arises from disciplinary situations. I definitely recommend this book to anyone who may be having these type of issues.



3. Becky Bailey has a well written book in this one. Wonderful advice and so appropriate. I'm a preschool teacher and highly recommend this book to parents and teachers alike. The world would be a better place if we practiced these principles.



4. We got this book a few weeks ago on the advice of a friend who is an early childhood education specialist, and we have been following the suggestions given by the author. My husband and I have seen positive changes in ourselves, our relationship with each other, and our relationship with our daughter. It takes patience, but the techniques really work over the longer term (it took us about a week to begin to feel that our daughter was less resistant to us, and that we were all working together). And some of the author's suggestions will work immediately. I highly recommend this book.



5. I use Becky Bailey's Conscious Discipline system in my classroom and it is amazing the differences it can make. But I got this book to help parents see it from the 'home' view as well. she does an excellent job going through this process step by step and giving many different solutions to common discipline problems. I love it!

5 comments about Your Personal Penguin (Boynton on Board).

1. My daughter LOVES penguins. When I saw this after looking for any books at all with penguins I knew she would love it. She runs and grabs all her stuffed penguins when we are about to read it. It's such a cute book!



2. Basically, a short book about a penguin explaining his undying (kinda stalkerish, I must say) affection for a hippo.
   
   Throughout the book, the hippo looks totally dumbstruck by all this attention.
   
   If you're coming at it from a different angle, I guess it might be kinda creepy (the scene with the penguin shining a flashlight at the sleeping hippo comes to mind), but as my nieces know this is Not Really Appropriate Behaviour that just, to them, makes it funnier.
   
   Found the song (downloadable... somewhere) to be a little uninspired though. *shrugs*



3. My son loves this book. He listens to it intently and at the end where the penguin asks "Please?" he says "pees?" I'm going to buy another copy for my sister-in-law who loves penguins because it is such a cute book.



4. Of all the Sandra Boyton books, this has to be my absolute favorite. I have read it to my little sister more times than I can count...we both have it memorized and whenever she wants me to read it to her...she just comes up and starts reciting it, "I like you a lot, you're funny and kind."
   
   I love everything about this book...from the adorable drawings...the witty dialouge to the perfect ending. "Please?" My little sister has completely grabbed ahold of the idea of being a personal penguin and wants to be my mom's...really cute and touching! Buy this book...I cannot say enough great things about it...you won't be disapointed!! =]



5. We love SB around our house, but my kids just could not get into this one.

5 comments about Twelve Hours' Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old: A Step-by-Step Plan for Baby Sleep Success.

1. This is our first child and we have been very lucky in many respects like ease of feeding and cooperation of the baby. My wife was apprehensive about what to do next when the baby was crying, sleeping, eating etc. This book helped to give her a path to success. Some of the information was not used by my wife and over all the book is very practicle. Here's what we took from the book and how it worked out for us.
   
   We followed the method of having a schedule and we do watch the clock. The baby follows our schedule, we don't follow hers. She eats when we tell her to eat and don't feed on demand. We wake her up at 6:00 am, change the diaper and feed 2-4 ounces of mixed breast milk and similac advanced 50/50 mix. The volume of the bottle increased to 4 ounces and now she is at 4-6 ounces per feeding. After the baby was content and had burped, we put the baby down for tummy time for an hour or maybe longer, then we moved the baby to her bassinette or crib for 90 minutes of sleep.
   
   We feed every three hours on a 6-9-12-3 schedule with a last feeding at 6 and 9 with hopes that she will stay down. We bathe her weekly and after the second time she seemed to like it, plus it helps to get her routine stabilized. My scheduled changed for the month of september and we went on a 5-8-11-2 schedule, any of these are good enough. If you get off the schedule by 30-60 minutes, it's no big deal, just get back on track for the next feeding time.
   
   One last thing, we don't keep quiet or dim the lights. If she has gas and gets fussy we try to help her get it out by walking her around the house in the shoulder burp position and patting. sometimes it helps when we put her in tummy time and rotate her hips to the side when on her back. You have to resist the urge and maternal instinct to pick up the baby when she is crying, just wait 2-3 minutes maybe 5 and see if the crying stops. Diapers excluded, she went right into 5 hours straight during the night then 8 and now she is at 11-12 hours. Good luck.



2. I read all of the reviews on this book and despite numerous warnings that it "wasn't for a breastfed baby", I purchased it.
   
   By 10 weeks he was sleeping through the night with only a diaper change around 1am. We have since learned to change his diaper at 11:00pm right after my last pump and he sleeps till 6:30am. It is common sense, adults learn that they are going to get all of their food during the day so essentially that is what you are teaching your baby. There is no starving! My son gets 28oz of breast milk a day, the difference is that instead of him "snacking" every 2-3 hours, he eats once every 4 hours, 4x a day.
   
   My son is now 3 months old, exclusively breastfed and he sleeps through the night. I love this book. It is straight forward, uses common sense and most of all, possible!



3. I read a LOT of baby books (way too many) while pregnant. After giving birth, I found that there were TWO which were actually worth the money I paid for them: Baby 411, and THIS BOOK.
   
   This book is a great middle ground between two extremes of baby sleep training methods: the 'cry it out' approach recommended by some baby sleep experts which I felt was harsh, and the 'no cry' approach which I think would have driven us nuts with no sleep for several weeks.
   
   This book is SHORT, practical, not preachy, and its method totally works! At least, it did for our daughter, and it claims to work for any child. Our baby took to this immediately -- she skipped over some of the 'steps' herself and adopted the schedule on her own much less gradually than we had planned or intended -- and is doing wonderfully. My pediatrician is amazed that she is sleeping 12 hours every night and even wrote down the name of the book to recommend to other parents. So that's my testimony!
   
   When I had a question, I posted it on the author's website forum, and also e-mailed her. She wrote back and told me to call her so we could talk on the phone, and we did. She is now my 'baby hero.'
   
   ADDED NOTE: After reading the 1 star reviews, I'd like to clear up some apparent misconceptions about this book.
   
   1) The schedule in this book is meant to be worked toward VERY GRADUALLY and gently, over a period of at least 6 weeks. The author does NOT condone or expect making a baby suddenly switch to this routine.
   
   2) Starting moving a baby gradually toward the schedule laid out in this book is not meant be started until a baby is SIX WEEKS OLD or older.
   
   3) This book does not condone or recommend ignoring a baby's needs at any time. Yes, our baby usually sleeps a straight 12 hours now, but if she does wake up, we attend to her immediately. In fact, we are more attentive to her because we know that since it's unusual for her to be awake, it is likely something legitimately wrong that needs fixing (i.e. no 'crying wolf' syndrome).
   
   4) The author does not condone or recommend that a baby under 3 months old sleep for 12 hours. When our baby started doing so at 10 weeks old is when I spoke with the author on the phone and she told me that was a bit young and we should still try to give her night feedings. But our baby just didn't wake up for them!
   
   5) This routine can be introduced to children older than 3 months... and even to kids as old as 5 years.
   
   6) I would not have followed the advice in this book if my pediatrician had not given it the green light.
   
   7) Some reviewers have cautioned that babies on this routine would develop 'failure to thrive'... but the testimonies of real parents have shown that this is not the case.



4. We heard about this book when our triplets were 11 weeks old (born 6 weeks early). We followed this book word-for-word, and it had all three of our children sleeping 12 hours a night within 2 weeks. We think this is a great book for people who like structure and schedules and who are willing to let their children cry for 3-5 minutes before going in to check on them. This book helped us get our children on a great sleep schedule early on, and helped us get some sleep too so we were rested enough to enjoy our children even more!



5. My husband and I were grad students when we had our first baby and needed to have time to work and study every night. This book and sleep method worked perfectly, without making us feel like bad parents. The baby slept next to us for the first 3 months of life and we never had a cry-it-out episode that lasted more than 5 minutes once we started the training. We were able to travel and stay with family and friends with ease by sticking close to the sleep cycle the baby was used to. We ended up having an excellent first year with our well-rested and cheerful baby and now that she's a toddler she has excellent self-soothing and sleep habits and going to bed is a pleasurable time for the whole family-- not a battle.
   
   We just had our second baby and we'll help her learn to sleep and be part of our family the same way.

3 comments about Positive Discipline for Preschoolers: For Their Early Years--Raising Children Who are Responsible, Respectful, and Resourceful (Positive Discipline Library).

1. GIves great ideas for dealing with the wonderful preschool years. This was recommened by my childs teacher and by the health education department of my local hospital.



2. Great book - All I want is to be a good parent - and this books helps me accomplish the goal.



3. Just ok. Talked more about what not to do than what to do. Didn't give enough instruction on exactly what to do.

3 comments about Player's Handbook Volume 3 - Make Her Squirt! A Quick and Dirty Guide to Female Ejaculation and Extended Orgasm (Player's Handbook).

1. I've bought a few books on this subject and have been close to making female ejaculation happen, but this is the book that put it all together for me. There is something about the way this guy writes which just clicked with me. Or maybe it's that I've been reading a lot about seduction and dating lately and was finally ready for the information.
   
   Either way, at under $[...], you can't go wrong here. I appreciated that the book was short and to the point. There is no filler here. No theory. He gives you what has worked for him and others (including me, now!!).
   
   I am confident that ANYBODY CAN DO THIS! It may take a bit of trying, but IT WILL BE WORTH IT. I was doing backflips when it finally happened and my girl thinks I am a superhero.
   
   So try it. If you need help, post a comment here and I'll do my best to get you the advice you need.
   
   Good luck everybody!!!



2. Remember when sex was fun and new? Get ready to feel that way again, because Tommy Orlando is going to give you the details on something that will change the way you have sex.
   
   Loved the first two books in the series and love this one even more. Tommy breaks down the most complicated stuff into a system that is easy to understand. The whole book can be read in under an hour, which I appreciated, because I'm a busy guy!!
   
   I think this book would be great for men OR women. It is very empowering. I realize that female ejaculation isn't exactly brand new, but how many people know about it? And how many people can actually do it or make it happen?
   
   Tommy shows you how anybody can do it and breaks it down in a step-by-step way. He gives you the background on female ejaculation and explains how science backs it up. This is important, because many people think it doesn't exist. You have to know it DOES exist if you want to make it happen, right?
   
   Well, I can know tell you first hand that it does exist. It's very exciting, too!!
   
   This book is worth 10x the price. 100x the price!!



3. This is, hands down, the best book on the subject, if not the only one I've found. It's a lot to take in, so read slow and always make sure this is something she wants to try to. All in all, a good, informative read. Another good one: Sex, Your Woman and You: How to Sexually Please Your Woman in the Bedroom and Beyond.