5 comments about Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls.

1. All I can say is I had problems with a good kid. The school's guidence counsler recommended Reviving Ophelia. I couldnt put it down.
   
   It doesnt tell you what to do but it does give an understanding of what young girls are up against and what may be going through their heads.In our case it was spot on. With this knowledge you can pry and get a feeling what might be in your kid's head.
   
   Some people are giving this book a basic rating. I dont know how they could unless they have an ax to grind or bigger issues than those in the book. As a layman I'll take a book of case studies over one person's opinion any day. No mold fits all
   
   Best to you and your kids.



2. I just finished reading Reviving Ophelia (Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls) by Dr Mary Pipher. Pipher is a therapist specializing in family and adolescence. Before writing this book, she wrote a book about eating disorders and while working on that, she noticed a phenomenon among her patients as well as her own teen girls. She says that when you speak to a 9 yr old girl, she is full of life, curiosity, energy, joy. You talk to her a few years later, age 13,14, and you want to shake her and ask "is there anyone in there?????" She wrote this book to explain what is happening at this point, why it happens, and how to prevent teen girls from losing their selves - because once this happens they typically develop problems such as addiction, promiscuity, eating disorders, etc.
   
   It's a long, dense book but it's a fascinating read. She includes dozens upon dozens of cases. Most of the girls and families she talks about have come to her because they are having serious issues, but she also describes many cases in which the girls managed to avoid getting into trouble. She interviews "successful girls" in order to show that it is possible to grow up in today's culture and still come out relatively unscathed. To a large extent, it's our culture that she blames for the problems. She wrote this about 10 years ago but the culture she describes is very much like today's (although today is much worse if you factor in all the temptations and dangers of internet, IM'ing etc). Girls today grow up bombarded with messages about sexuality, violence, the pressure to be thin, to be materialistic, to drink and smoke. Our culture often does not distinguish between sex and violence. Girls are caught in a confusing situation as they are encouraged to be attractive and appealing, yet they may be told not engage in sex or they may not feel ready, but if they dress in a way that's considered by their peers to be attractive, and they limit or avoid sexual activity, they are labeled a "tease" and harassed and ridiculed. Pipher describes a scary, confusing world for the average US Middle Schooler in which she will be judged solely based on her looks, since most middle schools are large and that is the most natural way to judge people, and in which even walking down a hallway can be a horrible exercise as boys will pinch, nudge, verbally abuse her. Pipher also places heavy emphasis on the way we socialize our boys, which I found very original and when you think about it, obvious. It made me think about the fact that I tell my children that nobody can touch their privates unless my husband or I are around, etc., but I need to take it one step further and in the near future begin to drill it into my son's head that he needs to be sensitive and respectful toward girls. Also, many of her patients were in trouble because of promiscuity, drugs, alcohol - and through therapy they discovered that they had been molested or raped when they were very young but they had never told anyone. After I read that part, I began talking to the kids about how if God forbid that should happen to them, the bad people who do that can be very sick people and try to convince them that if they tell us, we will be hurt - and that it isn't true.
   
   The book is disturbing in that it makes you think about how difficult our job as parents is and will be when the kids are teens, and if we have girls, we've definitely got our work cut out for us. But it's also hopeful in that Pipher says that all these cultural pressures, peer pressure, the natural rebellion a teen must undergo in order to assert her/his identity in the family and in the world - all of this can be much less painful if the parents are 1) loving and 2) disciplinarians. She goes into detail about various families, their dynamics, their structure (or lack thereof), and so on - and she clearly shows how parents who are very laid-back, let their children discover the world and themselves basically on their own for the sake of creativity and individuality - these are the children that will feel lost in adolescence and will become problems. At the other extreme, parents that have strict households and are aloof and unattached will also have problem children. The key is to be firm but loving. "Certain kinds of homes help girls hold on to their true selves. These homes offer girls both protection and challenges. These are the homes that offer girls affection and structure. Girls hear the message 'I love you, but I have expectations.' In these homes, parents set firm guidelines and communicate high hopes. With younger children, rules are fine,but with teenagers, guidelines make more sense...It's important to remember that rules, in the absence of loving relationships, are not worth much. Almost anyone can figure out how to break rules. What holds girls' lives in place is love and respect for their parents."
   
   Pipher is definitely a feminist and she urges us to look at the mass media with our kids and basically teach them how to filter the messages. Look at magazines with them and talk about how the kids are dressed, etc, and what kind of message that is sending? Watch TV, movies, and talk about the visuals. She says we live in a lookist society where it's all based on looks - talk about this with the kids, make them more sensitive to it. She also talks about how as parents we provide them examples of gender roles. "Parents can help daughters be whole by modeling wholeness. Androgynous parents are the best. Good fathers are nurturing, physically affectionate and involved in the lives of their daughters. Good mothers model self-sufficiency and self-love and are responsive, but not responsible for their family members." Time and again she cautions against being the overbearing mother who micromanages the kids.
   
   Something else I found interesting is when she points out that the most successful female adults tend to be the ones who were on the fringes in middle and high school. She says that the girls who were popular often turn into less satisfied adults. The most well-adjusted, satisfied adults are those who while growing up had to endure difficult circumstances. She says that the rejection these girls suffered made them create a protective space in which to develop their uniqueness. In their isolation, these girls turned to or developed certain passions (reading, music, a social cause larger than themselves, athletics, etc). These passions were a place to escape to when the school hallways were too painful. "The girls who seem the happiest in junior high are often not the healthiest adults. They may be the girls who have less radar with which to pick up signals about reality. While this may be protective when the signals come fast and furious, later they may miss information. Or they may be the girls who don't even try to resolve contradictions or make sense of reality. They may be relatively comfortable, but they will not grow." In other words, if your daughter isn't in the popular crowd as a teen, consider yourself lucky I guess! (Phew, thank God I was a reject!)
   
   Anyway, this "summary" is already way too long. And I could keep going, but I need my coffee. The book jacket urges all parents and teachers to read it but I'd go a step further and recommend all women read it. Even if you don't have a daughter, and you don't work with kids, as a woman you will invariably relate to much of what Pipher says. You will find yourself thinking back to your own childhood and adolescence and analyzing it in a way you perhaps never have. Additionally, I realized several times that as a woman you never leave adolescence. There's the joke that men never mature past age 16, but I believe that women are constantly in flux the way teens are, as we search for our identities with each new life phase. We are also subjected to this lookist society and culture that encourages a youthful, sexy image while being professionally successful, raising wonderful children and having an immaculate home. Perhaps reading this will remind us that teen girls aren't aliens from an enemy planet after all.
   
   Now onto her newer book, "Writing to Change the World"...



3. This book is a must read for all young girls and their mothers. I read this book when I was an adolescent almost 10 years ago, and I still think it is an excellent and valuable book. Mary Pipher complied gripping stories from young girls and shared them in a way that adolescents and their parents can relate to and it helps them feel validated emotionally. Even after so many years, I still wholeheartedly recommend this book.



4. Excellent book. Extremely informative. I had to read this for a class but would recommend it to anyone with adolescent girls at home or on the verge of becoming!



5. Frankly, this book is offensive. According to this deranged woman, females are poor little victims. What does being a victim imply? That a person is helpless, not in control, not responsible for anything, someone to be pitied and rescued and shepherded to safety. I'm not a feminist by any stretch of the imagination, but even I resent that portrayal of women. And what exactly was this woman smoking when she wrote this? Apparently, she has missed two salient facts: people (even males) change as they grow up and adolescence is a time of intense change. It's utterly ridiculous to claim that someone is "dying" inside because she is changing. And while SOME teenage girls undoubtedly experience problems, not all of them do. I think this book would have been a lot better if the author would have went out into the world and spoken to some adolescents that weren't in for therapy, to some adult women (they were once teenagers and just look at them! They didn't self-destruct!), and, if she was really bold, to some males. Then she wouldn't have gone about wasting everyone's time with her silliness, if labeling normal change in humans isn't something graver than silliness.

5 comments about Adult Children of Alcoholics.

1. The book teaches you about lifestyles of alcoholics and what they experience during the time of living at home.



2. This is an excellent book. I have used the book in discussing this topic in university-level Social Work classes I have taught over the years.



3. This book has helped me to organize my feelings. I feel like a more centered person.



4. This is an excellent book. I first read it nearly 20 years ago and I was blown away by how accurate it was - it described me! It was so helpful and I go back to it now and then for some reminders. It really helped me and was my first step toward real growth.



5. I wish it hadn't taken me 32 years to find this book--It really put my life in perspective--EXCELLENT

5 comments about Passion Prescription, The: Ten Weeks to Your Best Sex -- Ever!.

1. This book was not what I expected and certainly not what it was cracked up to be. Maybe when you're 25 and have all the ime in the world to be doing homework for your sex life, this kinda thing may help. In my situtation, there's multiple things, medical and other and I don't see this book as providing me with answers, directions, or solutions. I showed it to my doctor and he raised his eyebrows and gave me Susanne Summer's book.



2. So many things are covered in this book. It has something for everyone who is looking for a better sex life. There are literally dozens of new ideas and facts that you will walk away with, no matter what your situation is. I happen to be a single gal and have found the book to be really useful so far in understanding the "female brain." However I have also shared it with my best friends who are married/committed and they enjoy what they've learned too. Here are some highlights we've liked. (And PS-if you are looking for something fun to do with your girlfriends, this book and some vino are all you need for a great night. It's like a saucy book club.)
   
   --Info about the body, specifically which hormones and other chemicals really matter. How your life and aging can screw them up.
   --All about vibrators, "self-simulation" and other toys! Fantastic guide!
   --Tips for loving your body more as it is, instead of trying to look like a model. Taking your partner's compliments more seriously, too.
   --How to get what you want in bed without being critical of your partner. She talks a lot about how men and women are different in their needs and it's nobody's fault, you just have to find a way to work through it. Compromise!
   
   It's a good book and what's more fun than reading about sex?



3. Many thanks to Dr. Laura Berman for this book...
   
   Thank you for keeping the tone light on such a heavy subject. Until I began this program, my husband and I hadn't been intimate for nearly a year. Seeing the cover with that face I've seen everywhere is what made me realize that this doesn't have to be the case. And now that we're putting the program into practice and really following the suggestions I see that our love life can be wonderful!
   
   Thank you for engaging my husband with your book, Dr. Berman. Thank you for helping us understand that we were foolish to live without each other's touch when we're right here every day!
   
   Most of all, thank you for putting a time limit on this. So many things in our lives are ongoing and open-ended. Being able to mark a calendar with the end of our program is fantastic. Even more amazing are the results we've already experienced! (though that is a bit misleading, since I hope our renewed relationship connection will live on far beyond our ten weeks!)
   
   Thank you for sharing your expertise with us in a way taht we can learn together - and in the privacy of our own home! We owe you so much Dr. Berman!!!!



4. I've found this book really useful for getting back in touch with my desires and becoming more connected with my husband. Our marriage has had its ups and downs, which they all do. I believe that making your relationship work takes work. This book can help you get there.



5. This book surprised me. I got it for Valentine's Day from my boyfriend and we did all the homework. It really worked. He only had to read one page per chapter so he could stick wth. The Doctor knows her stuff!

5 comments about Parenting the Strong-Willed Child: The Clinically Proven Five-Week Program for Parents of Two- to Six-Year-Olds [Revised and Updated Edition].

1. I'm usually skeptical about books that promise "X number of weeks to a better something-or-other" but I bought this book out of desperation when NOTHING seemed to be helping my 2-year-old's out-of-control behavior. Biting, hitting, kicking, throwing things -- you name it, he did it, and usually gleefully. Our inconsistent methods to address his behavior went nowhere.
   
   
   After just doing "Week 1" of the program in this book, which is "attending" to your child's play (essentially narrating what your child does in play), his behavior showed a dramatic improvement. The other techniques described are fantastically effective, and I finally learned a good and consistent way to do time-outs with my 2-year-old. His behavior after only a few weeks is so markedly different that I'm constantly amazed. He rarely hits and never bites now, and he usually stops all other naughty behaviors with only a warning about a time-out; if not, the time-outs actually work instead of being just a waste of time. (Note to other parents: when we started, I felt like I was putting my son in time-out all the time -- that's gone down to a couple of times each week.) And it's even fairly easy now to get him to do things he doesn't necessarily want to do (wash hands, eat lunch, get out of the bath, leave the playground, etc.) -- just by talking to him (no time-out threats needed)!
   
   But best of all, I feel like our time together is so much happier and more rewarding. He loves the attention and praise -- I thought I was doing this before, but clearly wasn't doing it enough. I love that there's a way to discipline that's calm and matter-of-fact. There's less shouting and anger and a whole lot more peace and laughter.



2. Practical method that really works. First half of the book is a good introduction to simple child psychology that most parents are not familiar with. second half of the book is a step by step program that really works. After reading this book, I discovered, that parents too need to learn how to become better parents.



3. I am part way through the book and have seen positive results already with my extremely strong-willed 3.5 year old boy. I was at wits end so it is wonderful to find some help! I would highly recommend this book if you are struggling to raise a strong-willed child.



4. I bought this book a few weeks back and my husband and I are working through the steps with our 2.5 year old son. Our son has been strong willed since, well, before birth. Even he let his opinion be known and we've struggled through many challenges with him from the very beginning.
   
   We'd been able to cope with most everything he threw at us until the last 6 months. As I sit here, I am 35 weeks pregnant, and with the pregnancy fatigue my son has had more freedom than he ever has. We've tried everything with him, but it was definatly to the point of, "Oh, he's not doing anything wrong! Let me just sit here and enjoy it a second... being very quiet so as not to disturb him." I couldn't bring myself to play with him or engage him much just because I used all my energy on discipline.
   
   We are currently stalled on week 2 in this book (we had a bug go around the house and desided to wait until we're all back to "normal" before continuing). The changes, already, have been amazing. Just in the first two days my son stopped screeching at me. Apparently, he'd gotten so used to only hearing me reprimand him that every time I opened my mouth he felt the need to drown me out with this awful noise (I would liken it to nails on a chalk board). Now, because I can talk to him the noise level in our house has dropped, he's hearing me and responding to what I say (answering questions and even Following Directions!), his speech has improved because he's putting effort into communicating properly with us, plus, we can bring him out in public. I'm not saying he's a perfect little angel anywhere we bring him, but I've heard the sermons at church for the first time in 2 years. I can take him to do my grocery shopping while my husband is working so that we can do something fun as a family when my husband is home. We even brought him to the mall last night and he left the play areas without fighting us (yes, we had to physically go get him, but that's alot better than dragging him out kicking and screaming.) Oh, and we got dinner at the mall (granted it was a food court) but he sat next to me in the booth through the whole meal, eating his food and talking to us. Did I mention that his average major melt down has gone from 40 minutes of kicking and screaming (and generally making me want to cry/pull my hair out) to 10? Yes, they're still 10 very intense minutes, but hey. 10 is so much better than 40.
   
   I'm so pleased with this book, I could go on gushing for a good long while yet. I am so excited to continue on with the progress our family is making.



5. I highly recommend this book to any parent who has a strong willed child. It is very easy to read. It helps the parent understand how to act and discipline a strong willed child. I never really thought much about positive and negative reinforcement, but every parent needs to know about it...strong willed child or not. In my family this book has proven to be priceless.

5 comments about Preschooler's Busy Book: 365 Creative Games & Activities To Occupy 3-6 Year Olds.

1. I bought this book to help my younger children, ages 4 & 2, keep busy as I homeschooled the older ones. The activities were simple enough for them to do and very fun. We do several different activities a week and my children love it. The older ones try to join in, too! Most activities asked for ingredients that are common around the house so I didn't need to spend additional money accumulating ingredients. I recommend this book to anyone who has run dry of ideas to keep your preschooler busy.



2. I love this book. There are so many great activities that are easy to do to help keep your preschooler busy. I also have the toddler book and love that one. Great books!



3. My son enjoyed some of the activities in the toddler book, so I got this one too and had about the same reaction. There's a lot of good ideas in here to keep kids busy, but a lot of them need prep time. None of the activites they list are hard to do, but there aren't a lot of "spur of the moment" ideas. The best thing to do is to read the entire book, pick out 3-5 activities you think your child(ren) would like, and put the materials for those activities in a set place, like a box or a bin. When the kids get bored with those activities, go back to the book and start over. All in all I like this book series, it's got a lot of great ideas. Just expect to lay a little groundwork...



4. thank you for your good service. i was expecting my order to arrive in a much later date. thaks



5. Great book for the busy parent who wants to involve themselves with their kids. Fun, easy things you wouldnt think of that thrill a preschooler.

5 comments about The Art of Mingling: Proven Techniques for Mastering Any Room.

1. People fear walking into a room and starting a conversation. They don't know how to begin.....Jeanne Martinent ABCs for beginning conversations really makes you start thinking about opening lines with someone. Best of all, they are simple.
   
   Jeanne provides very helpful ideas about how to break away from someone at a networking event. Breaking away is something people fear for they do not want the other person to believe they are being rude. She describes in detail techniques that she has tested herself. Practical information for anyone.
   
   Kathy Condon, Author of the book "It Doesn't Hurt to Ask: It is all about communication."



2. I am only half way through this book, but already it has proven itself to be a charming and clever little resource. I almost returned the book thinking that I really didn't need it but for the price, it has a wealth of information, techniques and real-life anecdotes and Jeanne Martinet's writing is both witty and conversational.
   This book could really be for anyone, if one uses the techniques and examples with a little bit of creativity. I am a college student striding both business and social worlds -- when put into context I can see myself using Jeanne's techniques both at a networking event as much as I can a social-mixer. Expand the techniques a little further and they can be used in events where you might not know anyone (in line, in a new class, waiting at the bus stop, etc.). The only thing Jeanne has yet to emphasise in the book (and perhaps this is a good thing) is the effect on mingling and making friends -- this is not a book to teach you to be irresistable to men or how to win a lot of friends (many of which books I find unrealistic, especially since Jeanne's more practical book and those 'other' books emphasise the same thing: confidence and fearlessness), Jeanne instead reminds the reader that the art of mingling is merely to have fun, survive tough social situations and maybe even have an entertaining conversation with which to share with friends the next day. All in all this book seems great both for wallflowers who often feel tounge tied, and party-people who just want to seem that much more clever, alike.



3. I liked the introduction, in which the author talked about her friends asking her how she had managed to talk to everyone at the event they had just been at, while they had failed to mingle. She does give a few useful tips in the book, but don't buy this book if mingling is not, for you, an end in itself, as it is for the author. If, for example, you want to improve your mingling skills in order to make friends, this book won't help at all. The book might help you learn to meet everyone in a room, spending 30 seconds or one minute on each person, but the sorts of things she suggests you say to people made me cringe. Her system will help you meet people who are the most confident and who are fellow mingling lovers, but if you want to put people at ease so that you can discover who might be someone with whom you might like to create a friendship, her suggestions will prove counterproductive. If you want to mingle to make friends (or at least not to destroy any hope of making a friend or two) read the excellent book by Don Gabor, How To Start A Conversation And Make Friends. Finally, The Art of Mingling actually makes the author sound rather shallow, silly and even narcissistic (and believe me, I have nothing against finding ways to get away from the party bore with bad breath who has you cornered, etc). Disappointing, unless, for you, mingling is an end in itself.



4. this book was decent. it did have some funny stuff in it. but, i think being funny always helps ease situations where your uncomfortable in mingling. its worth it for some of the tips it gave. but, some or outdated/corny that you would look stupid nowdays if you used them. so, dont take everything verbatum



5. Sure, the techniques are all proven; even the most dedicated introvert has learned most of these by college. If you're a fairly average person looking to improve your game, this isn't the place to go; you'll find nothing new. In fact, you'll find everything to be almost insultingly basic.
   
   If you truly have a challenging time with almost any group social situation -- and I'm not putting anyone down here, that describes some of my friends, but it's not the average person or even the person one standard deviation below average -- then you'll find this book has those tips that you find everyone else in the room knows, and you wondered how you missed them.

5 comments about Emotional Vampires: Dealing With People Who Drain You Dry.

1. I found this book to be very interesting and eye-opening. I was amazed to see some of the most difficult people in my life so perfectly described. I thought that the advice was helpful and the warnings about these folks well worth heeding.



2. Overall, the information about these types of people is great. But the book focuses almost entirely on encountering these types in the work place, not in personal life. I deal with a histrionic cousin, who maintains her blond hair and Jaguar, while crying to me that she doesn't have enough money for food or medicine. Her non-stop need for me to take care of her has drained me. While I was able to get a lot of understanding from the chapter on histrionic vampires, I had to take the workplace solutions offered and try to tailor them to personal life. I would have liked the book better if it dealt with both personal and professional types and offered solutions for both.
   
   And I do agree with the others that he does take the vampire analogy too far. It seems to me he almost felt obligated to talk about vampires when it wasn't appropriate to do so.



3. This review is about an apparent manufacturing or publisher defect: pages 37 to 84 are missing! They are not ripped out of the book, they are simply not there. I did not start reading it and get to page 37 until after the Amazon 30-day return period was over, so I've had to go thru a rigmarole with Customer Service about how to replace the book, ship back the other one, get a refund, etc. Very frustrating. Also, the customer service dept at Amazon classified this as a "damaged in shipment" problem, although I did my best to explain it's a publishing problem. So now how do I know when they send me the replacement book, the pages will not also be missing. I highly recommend the book, but get it at your local bookshop or if you buy from Amazon, check those pages right away.



4. It seems that this book is simply negative. If you are so concerned about these "insane crazy people" then get away from them. Reading a book while imagining these people seems extremely obsessive and histrionic in itself.



5. Good read for the lay person in plain english. You need to read this so you can keep yourself from falling into the Vampire's trap.

5 comments about Just Breathe.

1. I have been on vacation for about a week and read 9 other books. This was by far the most enjoyable read I have had in awhile. I have read most of Susan Wiggs' other books. I am a relative fan. Sometimes they're good, sometimes not so good. But, this one was excellent. I would have rated this 4.5/5 stars if I could. The story may seem long to others but I laughed and cried right along with the heroine. Pick this up...you won't regret it.



2. Though I miss Susan Wigg's historical romances, she has provided readers with absolutely wonderful women's fiction and contemporary romances. This book touched me on so many levels, I was laughing one minute and sobbing the next. She has created a delightfully witty heroine who finally gets what she wants but suffers loses no woman should endure, but in the process she learns who she is and finds a lasting love. I found the story well written with a pace that drives the reader so they forget they have their own reality. Always a sign of a great book to my way of thinking. But she doesn't stop at a great female protagonists, her hero in this tale is a wonderfully complex man who has is own problems but clearly he knows who he is, this a man who readers know from their own lives.
   
   However, what really worked well for me was the growth of the female protagonist as she battles both internal and external conflicts some of her own and others from without. I have loved Susan Wiggs female protagonists especially Sarah; they are witty but flawed and are always moving in ways that readers can identify with. Bottom line no one, not Susan Elizabeth Phillips nor Norah Roberts, can create unique heroines like Susan Wiggs. This book should be read behind a closed door that reads DO NOT DISTURB, while they hunker down in their favorite cozy chair, a favorite beverage at their side and front of a roaring fire to keep them warm. This book will be difficult not to read in one sitting, it can't be easily put down. When I grow up I want to be a Susan Wiggs heroine



3. Sarah Moon thought she had found her happily ever after. She had a wonderful husband, Jack, who has recovered from cancer, a comic strip that allowed her sarcastic wit and observations from life a voice in the form of Shirl (her alter ego), and is trying to fulfill her dream of being a mother. Her perfect world falls to pieces when she finds her husband is having an affair because he believed Sarah was too obsessed with getting pregnant and sex had become a chore to fulfill that obligation.
   
   She leaves Chicago (it had always been Jack's city, his friends and family, etc) to return to her hometown in Northern California (which Jack never liked). She returns to the town that was never really her home and where she was the oyster farmer's daughter which she had always resented. She was loner in high school and found peace in her artistic abilities and keen observations especially in her underground comic which poked fun at high school and some of the personalities of her classmates. She returns to her father who she always had a difficult relationship with, her perfect brother, and her colorful grandmother and aunt. She also feels the void that her late mother has left behind in her life.
   
   In her road to recovery, she goes through the divorce process and all that entails. During this stressful time, she is blessed with the miracle of life and discovers she had gotten pregnant from the last insemination that also occurred on the same day she found out her husband was cheating. It is not the ideal situation but she has to get her whole life in order for her unborn children. She throws herself into motherhood annd doing it on her own (with the help of her family of course).
   
   She is also blessed with a second chance at a happily ever after. Will Bonner had been the airhead jock she had ridiculed in her high school comic. He was the person everyone expected to go far but he returned from Mexico after graduation with new wife and a stepdaughter. He settled down to raise his now 13 year old stepdaughter after her mother left town and is now the fire captain. She reconnects with Will and they form a friendship over time which could lead to more if circumstances were different. It is not the best timing since Sarah is going through a divorce, pregnant with another man's children, and trying to rediscover who she is. Will has to deal with a 13 year old teenage girl as a single parent (need we say more).
   
   Sarah changes over the span of this book. When she left Chicago, she really didn't know who she had become because her husband's life had dictated the last 5 years of her life. She really didn't recognize the person that she had become. Returning home she rediscovers the bonds of family, the importance of establishing a home, facing the past, following her dreams, and moving on to the future especially for her children. It also allows her to deal with the loss of her mother and re-establish and strengthen her relationship with her father and brother. She also realizes that she was meant to be a mother and it was one of the key pieces that she was missing in her life.
   
   Will and Sarah seem a perfect fit as a couple. The chemistry is there as well as the knowledge that Will loves her and her children even though they are not his. Sarah seems to be the perfect mother figure for the Will's artistic stepdaughter, Aurora. She kind of reminds Sarah of herself at that age and they bond of over their creative abilities. Will they be able to find love again and blend their families together? They have both been through hell and back and deserve their happily ever after as well as a bright future and loving home for their children.
   
   This is my first Susan Wigg's novel but certainly not my last. She creates unforgettable characters that the reader can relate to that deal with real life issues like infidelity, single parenthood, and divorce. So enjoy this wonderful heartwarming novel.



4. Sarah Moon is a cartoonist. She uses her own real life experiences in her comic strip "Just Breathe." Sarah's husband, Jack, works for his family owned construction company. Sarah and Jack have been married for five years, during which time Sarah has stood by and cared for Jack when he had cancer. She went through twelve months of fertility treatments in a desperate attempt to conceive a child to no avail. Then she found Jack with another woman. Sarah left Chicago and gone home to her family in California to lick her wounds and make a fresh start. As she plans her divorce from Jack she gets two unexpected surprises. She's pregnant with Twins.
   
   Will Boon is the boy Sarah had a crush on in high school. He ignored her then. Will is now the town's Fire Captain and father to his thirteen-year-old stepdaughter Aurora. Will and Sarah begin an unlikely friendship that soon becomes more, but neither of them is in a position to start a relationship. That doesn't stop them from falling for each other though.
   
   Just Breathe is a wonderful story bathed in vivid realism. Sarah's response to Jack's cheating, the birth of her babies, and her feelings for Will, are realistic and packed with emotion. I felt a real connection to Sarah. Either because I had a similar experience to one of hers or I felt I would have reacted the same way she did had I been in her shoes. Jack however handled things very badly. I lost respect for him quickly as he became bitter and selfish. His infidelity infuriated me. Will on the other hand is a knight in shining armor. He is compassionate, gorgeous, and honorable. He's the perfect man! Aurora is lovely. She's a typical teenager struggling to cope with some not so typical issues. Just Breathe is a realistic look at one woman's life as she faces loss and heartache, then love and joy. Just Breathe is my first Susan Wiggs novel but definitely not my last. She is a wonderful storyteller.
   
   Nannette
   reviewed for Joyfully Reviewed



5. I guess I was expecting something different in terms of humor, especially due to all the reviews about it being so funny. I thought the sad parts in the book far outweighed the funny parts. I'm a fan of the SEP type of humor, which is quick, witty, and regularly found in dialogue....these characters weren't that kind of funny. In fact, I found myself sad, frustrated, and unsympathetic to Sarah at times. I felt the ending was somewhat incomplete.....although I was led to believe it was happily ever after, I was looking forward to a final scene with everyone where their fate was absolutely unquestionable.

5 comments about Hands Are Not for Hitting (Ages 4-7) (Best Behavior Series).

1. I saw this book recently featured in an article in a print periodical about child development
   
   We've recently had minor problems with our 4-year old son acting out after preschool on days when he had been picked on by other kids. We got the book and used it is a bedtime story. It generated good dialogue (as good as you get with a 4-year old) and it made him think before he acted. It gave him some tools to use with the more physical kids so he resolves the problem in the moment without resorting to aggression. Wthat he doesn't have to resort to acting out to make the behavior stop. I am glad that I purchased this book.
   
   We bought also 'Words Are Not for Hurting' and that one was not as useful for generating dialog.



2. We have to read it frequently but it helps my toddler to address her feelings and her frustrations without hitting.



3. Repetition is a good tool for teaching kids to remember important lessons. This book does a good job of repeating that hands are not for hitting, and also suggests what hands ARE good for (holding hands to cross the street, etc.). My 4 year old loves this series of books and we refer to the text often in conversation with her to remind her of the important lessons.



4. we like another book in this series, Germs Are Not For Sharing (no, i'm not a germ-phobe, my 2yo just liked the illustrations), and this one is great, too. I like the tips at the back for cooling off when angry. The trick of asking, "what are hands for? how about waving?" has worked every time (so far) that i've used it. keeps my 2yo from hitting her 8mo sister!



5. I purchased this book for my 22 month old who has learned that hitting is an "effective" way to get his big brother's attention. My son is fascinated with this book and obviously gets the message. We have a few other books from this series and love them.

5 comments about Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul on Tough Stuff: Stories of Tough Times and Lessons Learned (Chicken Soup for the Soul).

1. VERY HAPPY WITH BOOK. MY DAUGHTER LOVES ALL THE CHICKEN SOUP SERIES SO I AM JUST ADDING TO HER COLLECTION.



2. This book was on my grand daughters christmas list. I was impressed by the way topics were explained and dealt with. I recommend this for all teen agers



3. The Chicken Soup books for teens are fabulous! My daughter really gets into them, she is not a teen that always is reading, but when she gets a new Chicken soup book she reads until she is done. We even talk about some of the stories in the books. I recommend them. True stories can help a teen get over what ever is going on in their own life problems.



4. We use this book as part of our Bible Study with our teenage girls. It has real life situations and opens up good discussion.



5. I purchashed this book for my niece and she seems to really like it. It's hard to talk to kids sometimes abotu certain things so I always try to encourage her to read certain books. She seems to really enjoy this one.Prompt delivery. product in good condition.