5 comments about Ride 'Em Cowgirl! Sex Position Secrets For Better Bucking.

1. It may sound corny but my boyfriend brought this book home and it's really revolutionized our sex life. For him it told him all the little things that we wish men knew but never remember to tell them because we just assume that they should know since it's so natural to us. Dr. Sadie really takes the guesswork out of giving each other pleasure. Thank you!



2. For my fifth anniversary, I decided I needed to spice things up a bit and bought this book and a couple of others. Sex Deck: Playful Positions to Spice Up Your Love Life- are a deck of "cards" designed with a position on front and the description on back. Was that an earthquake? The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex- is a fun flip over format with cunnilingus on one side and fellatio on the other. We enjoyed quite an anniversary romp and enjoyed reading Ride Um Cowgirl in bed later. It's not about impossible contortions but finding the best positions that work for both of you. It's all about making sex fun for both partners. These three items lived up to my hopes and expectations and sex before and after the anniversary has never been better.



3. Even if you're sexually skillful, you can stand to learn more illustrative and explanatory sexual contact.



4. I loved this book and really got a kick out of it. It's full of all kinds of different positions and ideas, and is written in a fun, friendly, informative manner. It's a good one to look through by yourself or with a partner and the author's writing style makes this possible. The content addresses straight couples but so long as you have an imagination and/or the ability to change out "him" with "her", this is a decent source of knowledge for any couple combination. I would highly recommend this book.



5. This is a great little book to have. Easy to read and easy to follow. I love the way things are split between those things just for "Cowgirls," just for "Cowboys," or things to be read as a couple. The diagrams are great too. Definitely a must have.

5 comments about Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Decide Whether to Stay In orGet Out of Your Relationship.

1. There are many reasons to consider leaving or staying in a relationship. If you want to take a serious look at what is happening in yours, read this book, work through the guidelines and use the tools presented. Being ambivalent about what you want to do is destructive to you, personally. This book gives you the ability to make a decision (one way or the other) that is based on your honest answers. Glad I bought the book, glad I worked through it (not once, but twice), and I would recommend this to anyone seeking clarity.



2. My best friend from college is headed towards divorce - as a friend - you want to help her - but what do I know about being married and having five kids - zilch. My cousin is having marital problems and mentioned this book - she said it was great. I remembered it - and I sent it to her hoping it would shed some light on a very painful subject. I got a txt from her a mere few days later telling me SHE LOVES THE BOOK!!! She said it is so immensely helpful, which coincidentally mirrored my cousins sentiments - it really makes you weigh both sides.
   
   So while I can't personally say I know this books value - two people that I love very much - on two different coasts - LOVE IT! Order it now!



3. Last summer I found out my husband was having an affair with a woman I considered my best friend. We've been trying to put our marriage back together, but as you can imagine it has not been an easy process. I love my husband deeply despite the affair, and I know he loves me, but with all the pain and damage between us it's hard to know what to do.
   
   Recently, it had all begun to seem hopeless. All we do is fight. My days became consumed with wondering if I'd be better off just ending the marriage now. Then this weekend I was in the bookstore and came across this book. I spent the entire weekend reading it. This book is so helpful! It showed me that despite our problems, my marriage is still too good to leave. Underneath all the pain we're inflicting on each other currently, our marriage is still alive. There is a solid foundation that, if we can tap into it, should be able to get us through this.
   
   This book also identified for me IN CLEAR TERMS exactly where our problems are coming from! And it made it clear to me that if we do not fix these problems, then this marriage WILL be too bad to stay in. But for now, there is still hope.
   
   This book has given me exactly what I needed. Now I'm not wasting so much time thinking about leaving, when I could be investing that energy in making the marriage better. And now I know what line to draw in the sand to tell myself how I'll know if and when to leave.
   
   I can't believe this book isn't more famous! Everyone should read this book! I wish I'd read it BEFORE my marriage got to the point where my husband had an affair. We could have saved ourselves years of pain and therapy!



4. "Am I throwing the baby out with the bath water?" That question was keeping me awake nights. Let's face it, whether to end it or stay will impact every, single day for the rest of your life. You wouldn't be reading this book if you weren't having serious relationship problems, but let's be honest, you wouldn't be confused if the relationship were 100% bad. I think it is natural to think of most decisions as a weight scale with the good things on one side and the bad things on the other and try to figure out whether the bad is more than 50%. This book helped me understand that the balance scale approach is flawed. Once I realized that each person has their own list of "musts" and "core values" which must be present for sustained hapiness in a relationship and that when any "must have" is missing, it's best to leave---I got it. You know truth when you hear it and this is right. You cannot "fix" or "change" fundamental core traits in a mate...anymore than they can fix or change fundamental core traits in us. You can "fix" things like housekeeping skills, or schedule more time together, or go to parenting classes, but you can't realistically change many core elements of another person. They either have what you require, or they don't. If they don't, you're just making yourself and them miserable trying to change them, and you have little if no chance of being able to do so long-term. This book is pure logic, and it allowed me to determine how to make a logical decision that I would never worry about 2nd guessing later. I am not a strong-willed person by nature. I tend to make many decisions based on emotions. I am a "pleaser" who has a hard time saying "No." Without having read this book, I would still likely be wasting my life trying to "fix" the unfixable. This book gave me the understanding I needed to make a decision I understood was necessary and right for both of us. It gave me the resolve to hold firm with a healthy decision. Three years later, I am in a healthy relationship with a man I have no interest in changing or fixing. I thought all relationships had to be "hard work" and even emotionally painful at times. I was wrong. Once this book laid out the traits a life partner must have, I was able to spot traits that made me turn and run and also helped me spot a mate who had everything I needed. I think without this book, I might have dismissed him and not have recognized what an incredible person he is. I was married this year, and could not be happier. I attribute my strength in leaving the unhealthy relationship and the knowledge needed to spot and select a healthy relationship in large part to this book. Warning: do not read this book if you really want to stay in a bad relationship and wallow in self-pity.



5. I found this book to be a great help for me when my relationship ended recently. The author puts things so clearly and logically; it was easy to follow her thoughts. I was surprised to find my situation so well described, often in sections of the book I hadnt thought would relate to me. I recommend this book to people who are unsure, but also to people like me who have already made up their mind but need a bit of reaasurance.

5 comments about The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships.

1. This book is extremely helpful. I often wondered why I give up so much of my own personality to blend in. Now I am working on recovering my personality so I can be a leader and be myself. I am sure there are enough doormats in the world without me being one too. Everyone should read this book!



2. It s changed my life, talk about a paradigm shift, a must read for all



3. was just a bunch of stories and told me nothing I didn't know already. It was okay as a one time read but not something you can read over and over. Might be good for some but I wasn't impressed.



4. This book has changed my life and the way I now see all of my relationships. The first chapter however is a little bit of history and to me seemed a little "pro-women". Once you get through that chapter the rest of the book is wonderful. Easy example and serious is explained and can be interpreted into your own life. It really opened my eyes in a lot of areas of my life. It actually showed me that what I thought was other emotions was actually anger and that the patterns I was in were causing it. I have re-read the entire book (minus the first chapter) twice now, and highlighted important thoughts, example for a refresher when needed! I would recommend this book and have actually bought a few friends there own copies to help them! If you haven't read it, I would say start reading now! I know the first time I read it I couldn't put it down! Life changing read!!!!



5. Dance of Anger is the most important book I've ever read in my life. It helped me get through a very challenging time, and I read it again every once in a while just to revisit its important lessons. If you have anger, read this book!

5 comments about The Knot Ultimate Wedding Planner: Worksheets, Checklists, Etiquette, Calendars, and Answers to Frequently Asked Questions.

1. This is a very well organized book with beautiful illustrations. As a wedding director for my church, I would definitely recommend this book to brides and their mothers.



2. Good product. I thought it was going to be a spiral bound binder though. Good Tips!



3. I bought this book as a gift for my sister to help her plan her wedding and from what she tells me, it is a big help and she carries it around everywhere. Great product, I wish I knew about it in time for my wedding.



4. In my opinion, it isn't worth paying for this book--all the same information is available, for free, at wedding websites. I bought a ton of wedding books--and never used them becaue I had all I needed online for free. If you aren't a computer-y person, then go for it...but if you know how to browse websites, save your money for the centerpieces, photography, or other wedding detail.
   
   Additionally, if you want to purchase a wedding organizer (really, all you need is an expansion file folder or a 3-ring binder & folders): DO NOT BUY THIS ONE! You really are going to need: one that lays flat (read: sprial bound or 3-ring bidner style), and one that has pockets for reciepts, swatches, contracts, etc. I found that since this had none of these--I used it once, and refused to lug it around with me.



5. Well with both of my children getting married, we had to have somewhere to start. This journal was highly recommended. I will let you know of my satisfaction or dis when it is all over.

5 comments about Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends, and Other Realities of Adolescence.

1. I survived eight years of single sex education (high school and college), and work in an industry populated by mostly women in office settings. I am here to tell you, it doesn't matter if you are a teenager in classes with other teenagers, or if you are in a multi-age group setting in an office - GIRLS / WOMEN ARE JEALOUS AND TWO FACED! As the movie Mean Girls was based on this book, it was more of a documentary than entertainment (although it was certainly both), and you realize how depressing it really is.
   
   Girls are mean. Period. No human female despite age, race, soci-economic backgrounds, value system, etc. is immune to the sociopathic tendancies that women are capable of. This is a good book for women to understand their peers and for mothers to understand what their daughters are going through. Traditionally, women were not taught until relatively recently that we are able to achieve the same things that men are. How we attained power was to cut each other in half with words. You as a woman must overcome jealousy and stop pitting one against the other.
   
   However, while this book gives sound advice as to how, why and what to do about the caddiness of girls / women, it can only give you good coping skills. The best way to handle these situations is to be nice, but not too nice to others. Don't let people get too close that they have ammunition to use against you. Believe me, if you have never experienced this before, you have no idea the lengths people will go to in order to cut you down. And, somewhat crazy as it may sound, I am a 33 year old woman whose closest friends are all men. Jealousy, emotion, and irrational behavior has cost me several women friends I've had over the years. It's rough sometimes, but, I guess I have no choice, do I?



2. Simply put, I found the book to far exceed my expectations for it. As a male, the author's insights into girls' social roles and interactions were a huge eye-opener. And as the father of three girls, I appreciate all the examples of specific situations girls may find themselves in, how their thinking/social conditioning may have contributed, and how they can extricate themselves.
   
   As others have noted, the author's presentation is non-judgmental, and she makes great use of first-hand accounts to introduce or support the discussion, not as trite filler.
   
   This book will go on my shelf as an irreplaceable "field guide to my daughters, their friends and their social habits".



3. There's so much good in here, but Wiseman's naivete on the normality of fatness gets in the way of this being an entirely safe or sanity-promoting book. It's simply normal for some women and girls to be "overweight". There's no evidence anywhere that fat people "eat their problems" (to use the naive phrase from "Mean Girls") any more than thinner people. Some of us are genetically destined to be at the top of the weight bell curve. It's great that Wiseman recommends The Beauty Myth, for instance, but I wonder if she actually read it. Or The Dieters Dilemma. Or The Obesity Myth. Or Losing It. Or any of the other books in the fat acceptance/health at every size canon.
   
   Perpetuating the old fat-people-are-gluttons myth simply is no longer acceptable or scientifically accurate. Reading this book and projecting its messages on to young fat girls is potentially as dangerous as any other form of bullying Wiseman describes.
   
   Maybe someday she'll correct this major flaw in a future edition?



4. If you have a daughter currently in middle school, this is a must read before high school!



5. This book does a beautiful job of painting a picture of the unique culture of girl bullying and teasing. Alot to be learned. Every parent with a daughter should read this book. Additionally, I recommend highlyBully-Proofing Children: A Practical, Hands-On Guide to Stop Bullying which gives so many strategies...both proactive and for intervention on how to deal with this ever pervasive topic.

2 comments about September Songs: The Good News About Marriage in the Later Years.

1. Here's the blueprint for a happy, lifelong union. It's called "staying together no matter what" --- and these couples, married 40 or 50 years or longer, tell you exactly how they did it.
   
   Author Maggie Scarf has written a wonderful treatise on fulfillment in marriage, and shows us how you get there: going through hard times, and moving forward with courage and commitment to a better tomorrow.
   
   There's nothing simplistic here, no formula, no program. Instead, there's the sage advice of 'the greatest generation' and others --- showing us the virtue and value of keeping your promises and staying together.
   
   A great gift for a wedding or anniversary --- and a great read for yourself.
   
   Dr. David & Lisa Frisbie
   The Center for Marriage & Family Studies
   Del Mar, California
   Authors of ten books, including: The Soul-Mate Marriage: The Spiritual Journey of Becoming One



2. If a marriage is less than perfect and the kids are out from under then why do people stay married? I think that's the question Maggie Scarf sets out to answer. She arrives at a very up-beat set of solutions. Just hang on in there and it won't be as bad as you think. Her methods are at least partly scientific. She reviews what has been written on the subject and she conducted structured interviews, including questions about health, sex and money, with 75 couples. A lot of the book, probably its most readable part, consists of descriptions of six of these interviews.
   Of course we can't know how objective she was, and maybe she would have had trouble finding a publisher for a book that just said we get more miserable as we get older. Suicide rates go up, especially for old white guys, although there is evidence that women suffer less depression.
   I think this will be of interest to older married couples. For professionals in the field of geriatric mental health it is lacking in scientific rigor. The writing is clear but klunky; full of adverbs and phrases such as "both members of the pair nodded in energetic agreement."

5 comments about After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful.

1. I actually read the author's second book, "How Can I Forgive You," before reading this one. I thought *that* book was spot-on, and her views on forgiveness rang very true with me. She basically says that genuine forgiveness must be earned by the other party and can be achieved when the victim no longer has to hold the wrongdoer accountable for his / her actions, but when the wrongdoer holds themselves accountable for them. While that book applies to many other situations besides infidelity, she really seemed to understand where the betrayed party was coming from.
   
   Having read other books on infidelity, I read this book to see if it would be as helpful. This book was rather disappointing to me, and after reading several other reviews on this board, I'm glad to know that at least I'm not the only one to feel that way.
   
   First of all, I take issue with what Dr. Spring says in her introduction, "I don't make blanket judgments about whether affairs are, in themselves, good or bad"......WHAT???? I'm really not sure why we can't all agree that affairs are bad. It often doesn't go over well when you tell someone who was sexually betrayed, disregarded, disrespected, and lied to that what was done to them "wasn't necessarily bad." Should we also try to say that stealing isn't necessarily good or bad too?
   
   She then says, "What may be enhancing for one of you may devastate the other, and destroy the relationship." Uh, yes- but this is THE MAIN REASON WHY affairs are bad- it's one partner putting his/her own self-gratification first at the expense of the other partner, despite promises made NOT to do this. Cheating, no matter what form it takes- whether it's "cheating" as in infidelity or whether it's "cheating" at a game of Monopoly, you are denying someone else fair treatment. So, in what universe is this "not necessarily bad?"
   
   The tone of her book didn't seem to place enough responsibility on the betraying partner. This book may serve to help the betraying partner feel better about what they did, but it sure won't help the betrayed partner feel as good about what was done to them.
   
   If there are some cases where both partners do contribute to the affair happening, there isn't really much cold, hard evidence of that. I certainly don't believe that to be the case in ALL affairs, so I was really put off by her common "one-size-fits-all" approach to this. I feel that therapists all too often use this approach to make their jobs easier, but it often isn't helpful to both parties, which I thought was the goal.
   
   She does say that the cheating spouse is ultimately responsible for their actions, but assumes that the faithful spouse helped to create the atmosphere in the marriage that contributed to the affair. Sometimes, this just isn't the case. How about when the faithful spouse sees their partner acting differently in the relationship, and makes many attempts to reach out to them, but the cheating spouse refuses their help?
   
   There are many betrayed partners out there that never turned their partner down for sex, and did everything to make them feel special, needed, loved and secure, yet still had this happen. Affairs can happen in marriages that were otherwise happy.
   
   Sure, both parties may have valid grievances in the relationship, but how is it that one partner is able to confront theirs honestly and fairly while the other dealt with their issues by sneaking around, lying and cheating? How about when one feels entitled to seek their fun elsewhere because they believe "men need it more" or holds other similar double-standards? The betrayed party didn't cause the other spouse's feelings of entitlement or lack of integrity. There may be blame on both sides for things gone wrong, but to assume both parties share blame *equally* is a mistake.
   
   I also don't think it should be assumed that the betraying partner dealt with most of the pain in the relationship, "causing" them to do what they did, or that the source of pain necessarily was the spouse of the betraying partner. We all experience stress in our lives, and it comes from many sources, not just from our spouse. And often, it is the betraying partner that has issues that cause most of the pain / problems in the relationship.
   
   I do think this book still has some good points. When she describes the "normal" range of feelings of someone who has been betrayed, it helped me understand that I was not alone. I took what she wrote to mean that these feelings are "normal" for someone to experience under the circumstances, as a result of the damage caused by betrayal. I also liked that she shared stories of many other couples who went through this.
   
   All in all, I think you should take what you can from the book, but the all too common "two parties contributing" theory with a grain of salt.
   
   A not perfect, but better read on the subject I can suggest is: "Private Lies" by Frank Pittman.



2. After the Affair is the most balanced and helpful book I've read on the subject of affairs.



3. It works at all stages. If you are trying to rebuild your marriage or just trying to rebuild yourself, read this book. The author helps you understand what you may be going through and how the other person may feel. I also strongly recommend the author's other book I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't



4. This says it was an unabridged version. The product that was sent to me was clearly marked "abridged." I bought the book too so I noticed how much was cut out of the audiotape. Book is excellent. Too much was missing from the tape.



5. As a marital therapist, I highly recommend this book for those who have gone through an affair!

5 comments about Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious.

1. I am so thankful that my sister-in-law pushed this book on me when I was determined I was going to divorce my husband. After nearly 10 years of marriage I now finally get it! Through this book, God, prayers of many and myself, I now have a reformed marriage and to me that is a miracle! I actually have the husband I always wanted and I didn't have to change him. This book is basic, bold and truly a no brainer once you have read it, if you know the Bible anyway. We need to get this wife/marriage thing down so we can pass this on to our children and so we can see less foolish failed marriages. I challenge you to read this book and keep it to reference and when you order it, order at least one more to pass on to someone you know who claims to be in an unhappy marriage.



2. First, I have to say that some very well-intentioned women study this book and live by it and I have no condemnation for them. However, when I went through it and started asking my husband questions about it, he told me to stop reading it and throw it away even though his well-intentioned mother gave it to me. I believe that his advice was demonstrating Christ's love to me, freeing me from the false guilt this book incites.
   
   While there are always benefits to godly humility and servanthood, the author goes too far in prescribing exactly what fits into her view of godliness. Like the pharasees of old, she sets up rules for godly marriage that are nowhere in scripture. The book condemns women who teach at all as having the spirit of "Jezebel" and gives the overall impression that the only purpose women serve is for their husbands' wishes and goals and that any other pursuit is ungodly.
   
   If you are having marital problems, this book is like prescription medication, it may do you some good but it could cause more harm than good in the long run. I recommend Ken Nair's books, "Discovering the Mind of a Woman" and "Discovering the Heart of a Man." Remember, your marriage takes two. Contrary to this book, it is right to have reasonable expectations of your husband to help him become more like Christ. Men, Ken Nair's books will rock your world!



3. Debi Pearl is direct and opinionated, but has some GREAT things to share. I have a great marriage, and still found lots to learn.



4. This book is a tough-love teaching that draws from her own experience and the Bible, and I have always loved it. But you have to read it, as with ALL books Christian or otherwise, with discernment. The Bible is the only infallible book in this world. All others are flawed, even ones that are based on the Bible, because even saved human beings are still only in the process of becoming perfect - they're not there yet. It is also important to keep the perspective that marriage is 100/100, not 50/50. This book is for women...so it talks about how a bad marriage is 100% the wife's fault. It talks about everything the WIFE can do, in her role, for a marriage. Why would it talk about what the husband can do? You can't control anyone else but yourself in life. I mean, who will you answer for at judgment day - your husband? God won't say "Oh, your husband was evil, so it's okay that you were too." A book for husbands should be equally bold about how a bad marriage is 100% the man's fault, and talk only about what HE can do. That principle is the most powerful one I have taken away from this book.
   In short, this is a powerful book with a lot of scriptural truth and a lot of plain old advice from experience. I get a lot of good advice from my grandma that is very similar - tough-love, bold, unashamed, focused on the wife's part of the blame (aka, the wife's role...hint hint), and based on years of experience. With my grandma and this book and any other book and any other person, you have to use discernment. Let the Holy Spirit show you what is good and what is flawed.
   But overall, this book has a lot of good - and even the flaws gave me opportunities to think about why each opinion was wrong and to search out God's opinion on the matter.



5. Pros: The things I liked about the book and have put into practice are the ideas on submission, honoring my husband, being joyful, understanding that my husband is a "Mr. Steady" and learning how I can support him. I like the phrase happiness does not always equal holiness. I also learned that some of my nagging (even which may be true or justified) isn't the way to win over my husband. Only God has power to change someone else. I can change myself and be a positive role model for my husband, and God willing, will help change him into the man God wants him to be. I agree that our culture has led us toward radical feminism rather than to authentic feminism.
   
   Cons: I don't doubt the goodwill of the Pearls, but the approach isn't as "inspiring" as it could be. God's way is the best, but I'm not sure this is it. This is a personal interpretation from a couple who either made the scriptures fit what they think the Bible is saying, or who are taking the scriptures so literally, that it misses the point of the true message behind the passage. I was shocked that the author took biblical scripture and twisted it to fit what she personally believed was true. I had to go back and reread it just to be sure I wasn't halucinating. The book states women exist for him and all his needs alone. Women are told to ignore their hopes and dreams (especially if you have a Mr. Command or Mr Visionary husband). Women are 100% to blame for all of the problems including porn, infidelity, divorce, and abuse. Wives are to wear dresses and grow long hair, unless of course you get permission to get it cut. I was utterly shocked that she told battered women to stay with their husbands. Can you imagine your children watching you get beaten by their dad and learning something positive from that?
   
   The Pearls are being hypocritical and less than compassionate to the people who write in for advice. A poor wife at her wits end is treated like a dummy.
   
   If you must, read the book with full knowledge of what the reviews say, and take the few pieces that are worthwhile, or select another book that is equally honest and upfront, but more encouraging and accurate. Other reviews are correct when they say: sift, sift, sift!

5 comments about The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding: Seventh Revised Edition (La Leche League International Book).

1. This is my favorite book about breastfeeding, offering a lot of very helpful information about the how and why and what to do if things don't go smooth. It covers many different topics. The appendix offers a long list of other titles for those wanting more in depth information as well as several lists of breastfeeding products and organisations that offer support and where to find them.
   Many have commented that this book is written only for attachment-parenting parents. La Leche League's mission is to provide mothers with information to help them establish a successful breastfeeding relationship with their babies. If someone had a negative experience with an individual representing LLL that doesn't mean that LLL is judgmental or unaccepting/intolerant of mothers who don't stay home with their babies or mothers who don't wait for their babies to self wean.
   I found this book to offer information that also encourages me to follow my intuition and to listen to my baby since as a mother I am the expert on my baby.



2. As a Board Certified Lactation Consultant this is the book I recommend most to my new parent clients. It is easy to read and full of the most accurate information available to have a successful breastfeeding experience.
   
   Ruth Bacon IBCLC



3. This book is a must have for 1st time breastfeeding moms and dads. It answers every question you could possibly have. It gives you schedules of what is to come and is full of helpful tips. My favorite is a nursing corner. There are a few things that were a little to extreme for me but I just read it and thought it wasn't my thing but maybe it would be great for someone else. Great book!



4. I bought this book in lieu of attending classes on breastfeeding. While it IS a book and not an actual instructor, I feel pretty confident about what I need to know to properly breastfeed my baby. There is a lot of information in this book on techniques, how to deal with breastfeeding a premie, continuing to breastfeed after going back to work, when to wean, what solid foods to start the baby on, even a bit of behavioral info. I found it very well rounded and easy to understand. It's going to be one of those books I'll be referencing frequently just before my son is due, but won't feel like I have to look at the pictures while I'm trying to breastfeed my son. I would recommend this book to any mother wanting to breastfeed her baby, whether she's done it before or not.



5. I didn't pick up this book until my baby was three months old and I had already been back to work for two months!! If you are pregnant and planning to breastfeed, read this book now! I stumbled across it when I was about to give up breastfeeding - my hubby was not very supportive, pumping at work wasn't seeming to keep up my milk supply and I was begining rely more and more heavily on supplimenting with formula. This book was a lifesaver! A month later, my supply is once again well established and my confidence is back threefold! I no longer bat an eye when someone snidely says to give it up, formula is the exact same thing... It is not even close! I know breastmilk is best for my baby and no one is going to take that away from me. All the information and support you need to confidently and SUCCESSFULLY breastfeed your little one is right here in this book. I highly recommend!

5 comments about Escape.

1. This book provides a graphic documentation of how tyranny, masquerading as religion, can create some of the most pathological societies imaginable, defeating laws and mores that prohibit simultaneous polygyny, slavery, extreme physical and mental child and wife abuse, arranged marriages, nepotism and cronyism, among other abuses. Through a combination of incessant brainwashing and bullying, a few old men run the lives of everyone in these communities of FLDS(Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints), in which women and children are considered and treated like mere chattel. Children are considered inherently devilish, thus justifying constant physical and emotional abuse to beat obedience into them. Women have virtually no say in whom they marry, most being married to men 2,3 or 4X their age and forced to remain pregnant for most of their reproductive lives. Thus, the long term domination strategy of this cult is to outreproduce the rest of the world, aided by occasional God-induced holocausts that spare them. The hypocritical leaders try to enlist state and federal financial support for their huge families by claiming they aren't actually married to these women, when it is convenient to do so. If women attempt to escape this cult, they are hunted down like escaped slaves. Nontheless, a few do attempt, and a very few succeed in escaping. The author's sister did escape before being forced to marry an old man, but was forced to marry a young man she did not love who helped her retain her freedom against great odds. This experience dissuaded the author from making a similar attempt until 15 years after her forced marriage to a powerful psychopathic older man, emboldened by her mother's escape a few days earlier. It was only the ascension of an extremely tyrannical man to the position of chief prophet(and profit), and the ever escalating demonstration that her husband had no regard for her except as a baby-making machine, that induced these 2 women, as well as others, to try to escape this cult, knowing they would be severely punished if they failed.
   A few reviewers have complained about poor writing and editing, boringly repetitive stories, contradictory statements and too many people to keep track of. Well, with umpteen competing wives per man and umpteen children per wife, the latter criticism is hard to avoid. If the other criticisms have some validity, I did not find them noticable and they were more than outweighed by the nitty gritty description of the deplorable psychological conditions in this pathologically xenophobic community and by the description of how the author's escape finally brought national exposure to the insanities that ruled this community and which began the unraveling of the hold of the power elite over this community.
   One of the most memorable revelations was the incident involving the sadistic elementary school principal who heard the commotion from a teacher-sanctioned party in a room. Without even consulting the teacher, he began kicking and otherwise brutalizing the children. The teacher was too cowed to explain the situation. Because of his family connections, this principal retained his position despite strong protests from the parents. Another of the unbelievable stories was the reponses to the 9/11 attacks and the later Southeast Asia tsunami. These were cheered as the beginning of an attack by God on the wicked of the world(everyone not a member of FLDS), which would ultimately result in the destructiuon of everyone except FLDS members.



2. Apparently the author put together a conglomeration of hallucination, exaggeration, retaliation, and called it ESCAPE. From what? Why? Perhaps it gets more sales (don't buy it). There are too many conflicting stories and tales which led me to say it should be in fiction.



3. Polygamy fascinates me, so I didn't hesitate to pick up this book. To quote the cover: "I was born into a radical polygamist cult. At eighteen, I becme the fourth wife of a fifty-year-old man. I had eight children in fifteen years. When our leader began to preach the apocalypse, I knew I had to get them out." This book is mostly an autobiography, but it's an alert about the inner workings of the FLDS (Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, the shocking and often news-worthy side of the Mormon Church).
   
   The preface details the night of her escape, but chapter one begins with her birth. The author tells of her relatively normal, though somewhat abusive childhood; how she raised in a "royal" family of FLDS and taught religion from her very first breath, always aware of her priviledged position on Earth. Chronologically she records her life, her marriage into an extremely disfunctional family and the power struggles within her house and her community. As her life became more restricted and the rules of her religion more extreme, she felt the need to escape and devised a plan to do so. The book continues through their assimilation to life outside the cult, how she obtained full custody of her children (According to FLDS law, mothers have no right to their children, but bear them only as gifts to their husbands and as paths to salvation for themselves.), and how she finally found love.
   
   Introduction over. I didn't finish the book. After 235 pages I had had enough. The book covers a very interesting subject and an amazing story, but the writing is just awful. I felt like I was reading an 8th-grade book report. It was a facts-based, unemotional retelling of what happened. "We went here. I said this. He said this. We had sex." The author seems completely unattached. What's worse is she fills the historical account with modern commentary, telling us why what so-and-so did was wrong or how this event that happened then contradicts her expectations now. The memoir is filled with contempt. Rather than a victor's story of "I am stronger because of what I survived," this story is a bitter victim's tale of "I'm better than my past and I never should have gone through this." I consent she has reason to feel this way, but her story would have been so much more effective if she had offered a personal, but objective view instead of telling the readers what to think.
   
   Final Thoughts: I'm going to keep looking. I want to learn more about the topic, but am thoroughly disappointed with this book. There has to be a better one available.



4. Love the book, I haven't got all the way through it, but it's hard to put down. Well written and real.



5. I recommend the book for it's content, not it's style--the writing is pretty awful, most notably for it's frustrating redundancies and lapses.
   
   Preconceived notions you have about the quaint, if misogynistic, polygamists of the FLDS church may be turned on their heads when you learn first-hand what it's like for women and children who are literally trapped in a community, committed to living lives they have little control or influence over.