5 comments about Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know.

1. Good message, good examples, well-written, easy-to-read.
   
   Do I give 5 stars for everything I read? No- actually- I can think of another book on raising boys that I read that was pretty weak.
   
   But this is written by a woman who knows what she's talking about (she is a doctor who works with kids and sees their interactions with their parents). All of her points that are opinion are supported by examples from her work. All of her points that are factual are well-referenced.
   
   In other words, she's not just saying what she thinks and what she's observed. She spent a good bit of time researching this material.
   
   MUST read- even if you only have boys, because inevitably, you will have a daughter-in-law, right? and then hopefully grand-daughters....



2. Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters: 10 Secrets Every Father Should Know
   
   It was nice to be validated as a father, especially coming from a professional (not lash back driven) intelligent woman as Dr. Meeker. Great practical stories that connects a mans heart to his daughter.
   
   The short list.
   
   -Tools that are usful.
   -Stories that relate.
   -Validation as a man/father/husband.
   -To the point
   -No psyco garbage but yet smart



3. just reading the table of contents, you can get a an idea...some good concepts. but why do the authors insist on bringing superstition into it? How can teaching a child god myths be good for them? Morality...yes, mythology as truth, no.



4. I have a few more years before I'm ready to take on the responsibility of being a father, however, my sister recommended this book for me to gain a better understanding of the magnitude of the father-daughter relationship. The facts and statistics made me much more aware of how dangerous our society has become and the challenges it poses for children. Dr. Meeker explains straight forwardly how us men need to raise our daughters and backs her advice on her scientific findings and uses actual examples of scenarious she's dealt with in her practice. I would receommend this to every father or future father.



5. This is a great book and a must read for father's of daughters of all ages. It is also a easy read that can be broken up into short chapters each day. Very applicable.

5 comments about The Art of Seduction.

1. This book covers certain concepts and ideas that you have probably been exposed to throughout your life, however the eloquent and exotic stories the author had woven into each chapters make his arguments potent. Even if you do not agree with the methods this book offers, you will still enjoy reading about it. i also recommend for this kind of topic my favorite book I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't



2. I just read Mystery's book, then the new book by Billy Conroy, then this book. Kind of a crash course in picking up women. Unfortunately, this book was third best. I enjoyed Cougars, Poptarts & One Night Stands much better, making it difficult to finish this one. Not enough real world examples here, and not enough laughter. JMO.



3. This book is absolutely fascinating! The historic relations to the content is helpful and provides even more insight throughout the chapters. The book wastes NO time with puffy sentences or grand introductions.... instead the author's every sentence has substance, and you begin to actually learn something right from the beginning. The book is a great tool to completely rebuild yourelf, as well as teaching you the 'art of seduction.' The book is intellegent and complex, yet it's written in a way that is easy to comprehend because it deals directly with its title. The book never loses the focus, and it is on point from beginning to end.
   
   The chapters/sections are just flat out amazing... it's like the proverbial 'light bulb' turning on in your head.
   
   Not only does the book support its title, but it's also a great description of the human condition in general.
   
   Very objective - Provides factual evidence - Non-biased - And downright illuminating.



4. As its more tangible counterpart, this information can destroy or sustain. From one standpoint I am just glad to have a pretty well organized blueprint of human actions: a lens through which I can categorize things I see. Personally, I intend to take it no further than to add some spice to certain relationships (and to wary myself against manipulative behavior): a pretty narrow application, I admit, but I'd have paid far more than $10 to get this information.
   
   To whom does the book apply?
   
   Seduction is a very general term. In that sense everybody needs to know more about, or how to defend against it because you WILL be seduced at several points in your life and it is likely that at least one of those events will significantly alter your future. HOWEVER, the book itself is far too corrupting for some reader groups, and a pretty obvious subject is divulged in far more than others. Definitely, as far as teens are concerned I wouldn't have them read this directly - but in the hands of a concerned parent or someone who can see beyond the sexual overtones, or maybe even use them beneficially in their marriage {though I can imagine ruined relationships due to too brusque experimentation} it CAN {and that's really the operative word here} give you insights into the human psyche like few books you're likely to read: if you choose to, you can spend minutes meditating on each page and even more trying to link a chain between various parts of the book to a particular situation in your life. IMO, there's that much good content.
   
   I've read my share of books: just finishing a very good 'The World is Flat', but 'The Art of Seduction' is the first that I consider a member of the 'red hot' category: my highest tier of books, to which I have not yet added one. What sets it apart from 'sequential books' that are unable to escape their content is that it provides a solid informational foundation for the thought process it instigates. That framework to me is the most valuable contribution - even if the author, and certainly some of the reviewers who got stuck on 'this book is bad because it advocates this, or that' only intended or noticed a prescribed linear applicative methodology.
   
   There are those who, in regards to 'The Art of Seduction,' aim to
   a) get too much ...
   
   The book itself, is massive, and overwhelming - lives of famous lovers and courtesans cover only a few pages each, and the fascinating lifestyle can make the gullible experiment with things they're not ready for - indeed no one person embodies the full raucousness enclosed, but it is alluring to try to grasp it all as a reader.
   
   b) get too little ...
   
   To treat it as a 20th or 21st century self-help book, where the main effort expounded is in the uncovering of the procedure by the author, misses the point.
   
   What this is, is a very interesting and well-expressed beginner/intermediate course in psychology whose practicability depends on how much you want to meditate and use to unlock certain aspects of your life: how much you get out of it depends far more on YOU than other texts. It will require a lot more imagination because the real deep learning in this scenario many times cannot be 1-to-1 applied (few are likely to live even one or two of the circumstances described, but one can definitely learn from EACH) - I believe this lack of perception is the motive for some of the negative reviews, though some of the positives probably equidistantly veer in the opposite direction (a shallow fascination with the admittedly very interesting and well narrated anecdotes.)
   
   So for all those who want a 1-2-3 book to picking up a 36-24-36 chick, look elsewhere and spare a good literary work your equally-weighted terrible reviews. As James discovered, 'This is not much of a self-help.' Shattered expectations, however, are not equivalent to bad content.
   
   [Self-help books are the 'cheat-sheets' for life, but Casanova didn't have a step by step program for wooing women. Knowledge and insight generate actions when inflexible techniques fall short. They both have their uses however, particularly with self-help books helping to add a focus to the 'how' that they 'why' books sometimes lack]



5. I am a self-confident, self-motivated, self-directed individual who pretty much knows exactly what to do and when to do things to get the preferred results. I am a smiling, friendly and mostly a charismatic person. At least that's how I used to be before I met this girl in my Freshman composition class.
   
   She was very attractive and I fell in love with her. She exercised the seduction techniques mentioned in this book (such as stirring interest indirectly, creting triangles, getting close to me and giving the impression of like-mindedness etc) to make that happen and it came to a point where I was fantasizing her with me in her life. She was all that I was thinking of. I was losing grip over my life. I somehow became dependent of her. She then started coquetting and withdrawing herself. I gradually started losing my self-esteem and I was no more that charismatic person with self-confidence and self-esteem. I was doing things that she thought would ultimately would lead to our mutual pleasure...but it only made both of us empty.
   
   Finally, one day she drove me to a isolated forest...and I thought she was going to have us do something pleasurable (finally). She just asked me to step out of the car and handed some papers and got in her car and left me there stranded. I was devastated. I started reading the papers. It was titled "The Seduction of ". It started with a character map of me...everything that she had observed about me, my weaknesses, what gave me my self-confidence etc. Then there were list of steps, almost like a manual, that described how she seduced me step-by-step. Then there were extracts from personal journal entries that described how, initially when we'd first met, she admired my quality of self-confidence and how much she wanted to have control over someone like me...primarily because of her own lack of it...and how over time she got bored of playing me like an instrument and how predictable I became etc. She didn't enjoy me anymore. So, she decided to dump me in the middle of the forest with this fact sheet. I was lying on the ground there crying my lungs out to death with limbs too weak to move. I completely lost my self-esteem and was at a point where I wanted her to accept me as her slave and was honoured by that thought. I couldn't even look up at people's faces anymore. This is the worst form of exploitation there exists. It almost feels like being eaten alive by insects from the inside and not being able to do anything about it.
   
   Few days after this devastation, I googled and found this book. I read it and it revealed to me how someone as intellectually incompetent as herself could do something as vicious as this. It made me feel a lot better to know how exactly the worst thing ever to happen in my life happened. Now I feel that everybody should read this book...just to avoid being exploited in this way, if not for anything else.
   
   Cautionary notes:-
   
   As for those of you who were inspired by the cinematic quality of what happened to me and are motivated to use the techniques mentioned in the book to drain admirable qualities off someone for self-gratification, I have to warn you by letting you know why she even had to dump me like that. She, after reading the book, had to condition herself against expressing any genuine emotions and had to perfect the impression of genuineness of her made up emotions. She conceded in one of her later personal journal entries that she was in a sort of psychological trap. She started having trouble doing even simple things such as expressing genuine awe or even anger. She always felt the need to go by the rules. It made her less of a real human being and more of an imitation of an admirable human being. When I recently contacted her, she said she needs professional help because she is very confused in discerning emotions that come from within and those that are just made up. Shes messed up.
   
   As for the testimonials of these admirable people (who practice the art of seduction) thrown around in Greenes book, I have to inform you that those people are genuine human beings with natural seductive mannerisms. The most dangerous aspect of this book is Greenes portrayal of them as people who calculated their behavior and that ability to calculate behavior as being admirable. It inspires people to look at themselves and their naturally arising feelings with belittling eyes and to try to become these admirable people with admirable statistics. It also inspires them to lower the value for their genuine emotions. In my erudite opinion, focusing on your behavior and trying to adjust it using the feedback it receives from outside rather than using ones judgment from within leads to termination of personal growth. If youre so desperate to have a reputable history of conquests when youre older as to compromise on investment in your personal growth and true exploration of human relations, then go ahead and seduce people into falling in love with you for all the wrong reasonsand become an imitation. Remember that unforeseen pleasures are often the most gratifying.

5 comments about The Out-of-Sync Child: Recognizing and Coping with Sensory Processing Disorder, Revised Edition.

1. I found this book to be very informative about sensory disorders and ways to help children overcome them.
   
   The first section dealt with the types of sensory disorders. This became somewhat drawn out for me. There were paragraphs about each type of sensory processing along with a chart of normal and SPD kids reactions. I found that the charts were more interesting to read and that I was able to see the disconnection of the child with SPD much better. The checklists for identifying which SPD your child might have were interesting in the details it provides. Unfortunately(?), my son never really fell into one category but had a few "hits" in many categories.
   
   The second part dealt with ways to help SPD kids overcome their issues. I found this section to be the best part of the book. It showed ways to provide support at home and at school. It gave examples again between normal and SPD kids. I found myself highlighting much of the chapter on how to help kids with SPD progress. I'm looking forward to working with my son on those activities.
   
   Overall, the book was very good. For those who have researched SPD before, the first section might be a bit repetitive. But, the second section was well worth it!



2. This book was recommended to me by my son's occupational therapist. I finally got around to reading it about six months into his therapy. My only regret is that it took me so long! It brought comfort to my husband and I that much of our child's "difficult" behaviors could be explained in such a sensible way. For instance, we never could understand why he would hit other children at daycare when they tried to gently touch his shoulder. Now we realize that light touch actually is painful to him. The quizzes are wonderfully effective tools. They helped us to know what specific things we needed to ask our OT to help him with.



3. This book is awesome. It helps you understand sensory issues and how to help with them. I highly reccomed this book!
   Barbara v



4. This book title was given to me by an OT. Since I knew little about the sensory issues in children I bought it. Was I ever glad I did. It has really helped me deal with the student in my classroom. Plus it has made me aware of possible sensory problems in my future students.



5. When you finally have a resource in your hands that shows a mirror to the child you're trying to help...well, you know what a great feeling that can be. While I could re-read many sections so that I could better understand the deficiencies my child's nervous system has, I came away from this book knowing that I finally have a handbook on his problems. It's a very comprehensive collection of both explanation and resources. I'm telling my whole family to read it.

5 comments about Georgiana: Duchess of Devonshire (Modern Library Paperbacks).

1. if some one told me what really happen 18th century upper crust i would not believe them.money,sex,adultery,hidden preganacy,lesbianism,royality,gambling and drug addiction.fashion theather social scandals,politics,betrayal, blackmail and war.it's a soap opera that really happen.even a evil bestfriend who bears two childern by georgina husband is through in.this book is addictive.i didn't put it down till last page.



2. I was never a biography fan until this book. Foreman does a dazzling job of bringing Georgiana to life. I could read this book over and over again!



3. Georgiana Spencer Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire, was born in the eighteenth century and died in the early nineteenth century, but her life was very modern in many ways. She was an open activist at a time when women were supposed to stay behind the scenes, a bold and flamboyant hostess who used her social prestige to advance her political agenda, and a beautiful but ultimately self-destructive woman whose emotions helped shape British history.
   
   Georgiana was born into one wealthy and powerful aristocratic family and married into an even wealthier and more powerful one. The Cavendishes were bastions of the Whig oligarchy, which governed Britain almost continuously through the eighteenth century until the 1760s, when King George III forced them out of power. In opposition the Whigs became the progressives or liberals of the day, calling for curbs on the King's powers, protection for the liberties of the people, and for progress and social reform (with the ultimate aim of regaining power for themselves, of course). Georgiana was married to the Duke of Devonshire, who was retiring where she was outgoing, far more interested in living a quiet life with various mistresses than in helping to advance the Whig cause. Georgiana, frustrated with a husband who did not appreciate her, threw herself into politics, becoming a friend of Whig leaders like Charles James Fox and campaigning openly for him and others.
   
   Georgiana's private life was complicated. She and her husband were involved in a years long menage a trois with Lady Elizabeth Foster, who was simultaneously Georgiana's best friend and the Duke's mistress and mother of his illegitimate children. Georgiana was addicted to gambling and lost enormous sums which she feared to reveal to the Duke. Eventually Georgiana herself had a love affair which nearly caused her marriage to end and forced her temporarily out of sight. Although she returned to political life after some years, her health broke down and her influence remained diminished.
   
   Amanda Foreman has produced a work of great scholarship which reads like a novel. Georgiana's life is so fascinating that I've read this biography several times just to see what she would get up to next and how she would get out of one scrape after another. Foreman makes the good point that Georgiana epitomized many women of the eighteenth century, who were far more active and involved in politics than is generally supposed, as well as being a harbinger of the kind of power base to which women in the twentieth and early twenty-first centuries still aspire.



4. disappointed-- narrative is hard to follow, maybe it's the small print. I was hoping that Georgiana would jump out at me -- but she still seems distant. Well-researched.



5. After finishing "Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire" by Amanda Foreman, I have come to the conclusion that the flaming youth of the 1770's and 80's were just about as wild a bunch that could be. It seems that the generation of aristocrats who came of age in the decade and a half immediately before the French Revolution liked to live life at the edge. Fashions were extreme, homes were elaborate, and fortunes were gambled blithely away. Traditional morals and religious practice were given a public nod while being privately cast aside. The "sweetness of living," as Talleyrand nostalgically referred to the "ancien régime," was to be replaced by the wars and successive revolutions of the next two centuries.
   
   The decadent old world, which would soon be turned upside down, was in England presided over with glamor and opulence by Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire. In France, Marie-Antoinette was perceived as being the queen of the fashionable whirl, but she was never so popular in society and genuinely influential in politics as was her friend Georgiana in England. Also, Marie-Antoinette's domestic life became calmer after the birth of her first child at age twenty-two. With Louis XVI to steady her, she eventually gave up gambling, and became the strong and courageous queen who was able to face the upheavals of the Revolution. Furthermore, Louis did not indulge in chronic infidelity as did the Duke of Devonshire. Georgiana, on the other hand, went from one personal fiasco to another, hardly ever letting up until she was in her forties, and even then died with enormous debts.
   
   The book gives a detailed account of the vast political influence wielded by ladies of high society in the days when women could not vote. The assortment of characters depicted by Reynolds and Gainsborough were finally given personality for me in Foreman's well-written biography. My trouble was with Georgiana herself. I could not grasp why she was so psychologically needy, what with the drinking and all night parties and spending and inordinate attachments to her friends. She had come from a loving family, although they were not perfect, but at least they cared and actively intervened in her troubles. Her husband did not love her, clearly, but many women were in loveless marriages. Unlike Marie-Antoinette, Georgiana could not seem to get her gambling under control. I do not understand why such a charming, intelligent and popular woman would be so insecure. Part of this is because I am so used to reading and writing about people who had extreme traumas and upheavals, such as Louis XVI, Marie-Antoinette and their immediate family. Most of poor Georgiana's troubles were of her own making and completely avoidable. While she is a fascinating character, adored by the common folk for her ability to mingle, she is a bit puzzling.
   
   For one thing, it was so odd for Georgiana to tolerate Bess Foster's presence in the Duke of Devonshire's bed for all those years. Georgiana was such a bottomless pit of emotional need that she insisted on keeping Bess as her friend no matter what. As for Bess, she wanted everything Georgiana had; she wanted to be Georgiana. In the end, she had her way, and became the Duchess of Devonshire, but she was never loved the way Georgiana was loved. Georgiana's daughter Harriet described Bess thus: "...More perverted than deceitful...I really believe she hardly knows herself the difference between right and wrong now." (p. 308) Foreman says that Bess' version of events in her diary "was more fantasy than truth." (p.177) This is why I take it as a grain of salt when anything Bess wrote in regard to Count Fersen and Marie-Antoinette is given as evidence that they had an affair.
   
   The person I find to be most sympathetic in the biography about Georgiana is her long-suffering mother, Lady Spencer. I do not blame Lady Spencer one bit for having the governess as her spy. After all, she had to keep track of the various illegitimate children who were being smuggled into the Cavendish nursery, after being born and fostered out with utmost secrecy. Between Bess Foster and Georgiana's sister Harriet, I lost track of which child belonged to whom. And then Georgiana herself, fleeing to France to give birth to little Eliza. At least the children were not abandoned or destroyed; each was given care and love. For Lady Spencer to try to supervise the situation, and attempt to have Bess thrown out, was basic prudence. She was the only responsible adult in the clan and how her daughters carried on must have broken her heart.
   
   I wish I could have understood why Georgiana plunged into the affair with Charles Grey, Eliza's father. Her life was already a mess, what with the heavy drinking and gambling; her involvement with Earl Grey served to further complicate matters. The affair seemed to come not so much from a great love but from sheer recklessness on the part of someone who had totally lost control of her life. However, the book does not capture any sense of passion. Perhaps that is because so many of Georgiana's letters were censored or destroyed by her Victorian descendants, quite an editorial feat in itself.
   
   To Georgiana's credit, she often displayed genuine remorse for her disordered ways and tried to amend her life. Her failing health eventually forced her into a simpler, calmer existence. Her oldest daughter wrote that she was the best of mothers. The Duchess was devoted to her family, no question about it, while struggling with so many addictive behaviors, so many demons. Tormented she was, without a doubt. I only wish I understood why.

5 comments about For Women Only: What You Need to Know about the Inner Lives of Men.

1. This simple, easy read is fabulous for getting women to see things from the man's perspective. When my husband and I were first married we figured that we were basically the same and so we put ourselves in the other person's shoes in order to make decisions about how to behave and what to say. This eye opening book shows that you really can't just put yourself in the other person's shoes because the other person is fundamentally different! Great book. Read this before you get married or when you are first married! Don't wait for your silver anniversary to read it!!!



2. This book is to the point. She has alot of the same topics & langauge as another well know author but without all the pages to go through. Each chapter is a quick & easy read. Makes for good dicussion.



3. This is a great book. At first, I thought it would be a bunch of wife submitting advise but not so. It is a book with great insight!! I recommend it to all women.



4. Our pastor recommended this book (who knew!). My husband read "For Men Only" and I read "For Women Only." Before we were married, we decided that each year, we would read a 'foster our relationship' book together. This is by far the best read we've done! Very insightful, specific and a fun read. We've already recommended these books to a number of friends and family members- both those with great marriages and those that could stand a little assistance. I recommend these books to anyone that isn't a mind-reader when it comes to their spouse!



5. This book really helped me understand my husband on a deeper level. It gave us meaningful things to discuss and helped me appreciate him even more.

5 comments about Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl-A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship.

1. I LOVE THIS BOOK! I READ IT AT LEAST 10x AND CONTINUE USING for REFERENCE.Argov points out some really important things that a lot of women forget once they are really into a someone. They forget to love themselves. If you have never read this book it's a must have. I live by Argov's advices, and most of the advices worked in my personal experiences.



2. I had a friend recommend this book, as she had heard other non-married women recommend it. I think it is pop psychology at it's worst and I like pop psych usually.
   
   If you are truly a doormat in all facets of your life, can't say no, then buy the book.
   
   If you are single, because you have focused on your career and have a limited dating pool then don't buy the book.
   
   If you like the book "The Rules" then again you might like it. I think dating as a grown up requires throwing out the rules, being honest and enthusiastic to meet new people. This book doesn't suggest that as a solution versus once again the single woman is told "it is all you." It could really be you, I don't know you ;-)
   
   The book is written in a satire format which is amusing, but I read about half of it and said enough. I do have a friend who I think maybe could use the book, but I am afraid she might take it literally. So for now it lies beside my bed and I probably won't finish reading it.



3. 
   Basic training in relationship self-respect for women, wrapped in humor.
   Recommend it for all women, as well as "Why Men Marry Bitches.."
   
   Good refresher for those of us widowed or divorced, as well.



4. This is a hilarious book. There are so many truths that you can find out about yourself by reading it. I have to admit, there were times that I was so shocked at what I discovered about myself that at some point my jaw dropped!



5. Its a book every women will benefit from unlike many other books on the same subject...this book is simple, easy, clear, and right to the point.
   Simply I LOVED IT and read it twice :)

5 comments about Setting Limits with Your Strong-Willed Child : Eliminating Conflict by Establishing Clear, Firm, and Respectful Boundaries.

1. I am a separated dad. I love my daughter but when she come to visit my home she get wild some times she's only 5 so it's was very difficult for me to discipline her. even thought she see me few time's for a week she spend few day's at my home every month. so for her it's like going to the park when she come to my place. it's all fun. some time's when i ask her to eat or put her toy's away when she's done she do not listen to me.
   So i went on looking for some help and found this wonderful Book (for me its' like a bible) I am telling you this is some thing you must read even if your child listen to you.
   It's the best thing when you know how to work with your child and see them learn and behave.



2. We were having a difficult time disciplining our four year old daughter. Everyday was a battle and usually involved screaming. Nothing was working. We implemented the steps in this book. Things got worse before they got better, but they got better quickly. Within a few days we noticed a marked difference in the "push back" we were getting from her. Now, we know exactly what to do and remain consistent. I have told all of my friends about this book. It works. But, you have to follow through and keep it going.



3. very clear, powerful book.
   limit & discipline seem so simple - but with a strong willed kid, you can go crazy. give very clear steps.
   pediatrician friend recommended this. she says she recommends it to her families at least once a day.



4. This book is a must have for any parent who struggles with disciplining their child. Our 3.5 year old son is very strong willed and traditional methods of time out (in a corner) were not working. This book was well written and filled with helpful examples. Within a week we noticied a difference - and best of all - I feel confident about what I am doing. If you are even considering the book - buy it.



5. I recently purchased this book because I was at my wits end with my 'strong-willed' child. I felt completely out of control and ill-equipped to handle the challenges my child poses. I found this book to be very helpful in the area of explaining the behavior and how to effectively respond to the behavior. There has been a marked difference in our household in the short time since I purchased and read this book. I highly recommend it to any parent, especially those with children who are challenging.

5 comments about The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed.

1. This book was great. A little difficult to read (I suggest reading it more than once), but it really teaches you a lot. Great overall.



2. Mystery is the king of PUA. He is what we all try to aspire to be. It's a given fact. Neil Strauss made us all realize this in the Game. So why in the hell does Mystery spend the first 30 pages of this book trying to convince me that his method and the Venusian Arts work. Dude, no kidding, let's get straight to the point and teach me the techniques. You're already a household name, I don't need any more convincing. Once I got through all that, and there is a lot of it, it's good, and I was able to improve my skillset because of it. I want to be out there learning the game, not wasting an hour of my time being convinced that Mystery is the man.



3. Erik von Markovik thinks like a Stage Magician. Thus, he has a magician mindset.
   
   He has the skills of leading folks through baby-step commands and body moves to control them.
   
   In doing so, he controls their perception of ongoing at-the-moment experience and gains compliance.
   
   In short, he creates mini-illusions like the Prize Illusion, the You're Getting Somewhere Illusion and the You're Cool Illusion.
   
   By his dress and looks, Erik must have modeled himself after Steven Tyler of Aerosmith, right down to the black fingernail polish and the big floppy top hat.
   
   Built from Group Dynamics and Dominance, the Mystery Method model makes these claims:
   
   [1] Women want to feel secure, always
   [2] Women want to feel excited
   [3] Women want to know that you can deliver [1],[2]
   [4] Women want men to be responsible for all [1],[2]
   [5] Women only test contenders, those who could get sex
   [6] Women must feel resistance after push testing to feel secure
   
   [7] You must show higher worthiness than all other suitors
   [8] You must act disinterested to the woman within a group who you want while showing your higher than others worthiness
   [9] You must dominate the experience and all in the group through controlling the frame of reference, temporary beliefs
   [10] You must come across as alive, deep, sexual, yet never easy, wimpy or a pushover
   [11] You cannot make a woman feel like a slut in front of her peers
   [12] You must control time perception of others
   [13] You must gain dominance through Compliance Momentum that leads past the Compliance Threshold
   
   In Erik's (or Chris Odom's) own words (from page 101):
   
   "But in the Mystery Method, we approach the group itself. Women tend to be attracted to the highest-value man in their social context...you disarm the friends with stories, humor ... [to] steal the spotlight away from the hottie (the girl you want) ... [and] by negging (cutting down) the target (the girl you want)...Because her friends [now] love you ... you have social proof [status with] her peer group. Her [lowered] self-esteem [from] the negs ... [make her want] more attention from you ... She begins to work for your approval and [seeks] validation [from you]."
   
   Few books are worth trading your time to read them.
   
   This book offers some gems, a 20-something interpretation of university lectures in Group Dynamics and Interpersonal Communication Persuasion. Throw in
   a few stage musician methods and you come up with the "Mystery Method."
   
   Like most books, the story does not begin until several chapters ahead and like most books, The Mystery Method suffers from a bad chapter sequence.
   
   Much of what you read from the Optional Chapters reflects social indoctrination that Erik took as a Canadian national. Thus, you can skip such without losing the essence of the method.
   
   Here's a better chapter sequence to get you to the story faster:
   
   Part I -- Foundation (Must Read)
   ------------------------------------
   Rewiring her Attraction Circuitry (3)
   A3: Male-to-Female Interest (7)
   A2: Female-to-Male Interest (6)
   
   Part II -- Action (Must Read)
   ------------------------------------
   
   Conversation (8)
   Rules and Structure of the Game (4)
   A1: Open (5)
   Mid-Game and End Game (9)
   
   Part III - Optional Reading
   --------------------------------------
   Forward by Neil Strauss
   Preface
   The Mystery Behind Casonova (1)
   The Ultimate Purpose of Life (2)
   Conclusion
   A Bonus Letter from Mystery
   Glossary



4. Too many people know Mystery's Method, so it is becoming overused. Every girl has now been asked the same dumb questions by guys "Did you see that fight outside?" etc. I just wish there was some new material.



5. The Mystery Methods still work, you just have to stick with it. Also recommend "Secrets of the A Game" by Logan Edwards and "The Game" by Neil Strauss.

5 comments about The Magic of Thinking Big.

1. I listened to this on unabridged audio, and I loved it! The narrator's voice is charged up with enthusiasm and is very engaging, and the tips and tricks are basic but very powerful. If you are just beginning a new venture and suspect that your mind may not be in the right place - read this book.
   
   I loved the simple exercises and tricks for engaging your passion and excitement about what you do. One trick I tried that I really liked was that I defined what service I was really providing to people. I am a landscaper, so instead of saying "I trim people's gardens and keep them neat", I said "I help people take joy and pleasure in their home and outdoor spaces, and make it easy for them to connect with nature and our awesome outdoor world. I also help them achieve all that they can in their own lives by providing a relaxing and beautiful space for them to unwind and think clearly in."
   
   Do you see how the second one makes me feel charged up every day to go to work? And what an impact that has on my employees, to know that they are in the business of helping people connect with the environment and achieve all they can in their lives, through the enjoyment of their outdoor spaces?
   
   These kinds of small tips help you wrap your mind around making your job your life's work, and help you take things to the next level. I think people hire me over my competitors because I love what I do and it shows in my voice and actions, and this book really helps me keep that passion alive even on the rainy days or when I get bit by wasps.
   
   There were a lot of great small tips like that about how to have the right attitude to enable success. I'd really recommend it to anyone stuck in the doldrums of their work or just beginning a new venture.



2. This book seems to be one of the pioneers to the current trend on learning and applying The Law of Attraction principles. Here the author shows you how to believe to succeed. Excellent book and similar to my favorite, [[ASIN:1419674609 Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook]which gives you a current approach and application to find what you are looking for.



3. This is a great book, and one of the handful of 'fundamentals' books that should be read by people of all ages, regardless of profession. The earlier in life this book can be read (or listened to) the better, as it is critical to the building blocks of positioning life for success. It is easy to follow, understand, and has excellent tools/techniques that can be applied immediately. Probably a book that should be reviewed again every couple years. Along the lines of the 7 Habits of highly effective people by Covey, this book is another key read for strategy of life.



4. This book has been one of the biggest influences for me in my life. "Thoughts, positive or negative, grow stronger when fertilized with constant repetition." Readers quickly begin to see the connection between worrying and actual misfortune as something they have control over. Thinking positively and not letting yourself be limited by negativity and skepticism has amazing effects on your life and who you see youself as, and it affects who you will become. Read this book if you at all concerned with achieving your goals no matter how BIG they are.



5. I'll keep it simple. I took the advice 'Be a Front Seater' from this book, and went from being a sit-at-the-back, never-volunteer guy to becoming a person consulted by government on legislation affecting private investigators; writing two books; getting the job I always wanted; and many other things.
   
   If that one piece of advice can have such impact, imagine the effect of the rest! BUY IT - and live a new life by taking action on the content.

5 comments about Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition.

1. This book was right on I reviewed it many time. I gave it four stars because the book was simple and made since. Nothing complicated. The reason it did not make 5 stars is because it only relates to people in a relationship. Not those looking.



2. The author gives excellent advice on how each person can grow and learn to fulfill their own needs as well as their spouse's. Even if my marriage does not work out I will take comfort in the fact that my next spouse will get the very best me possible.
   
   It is also an exceptionally easy read and great book about this topic I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't.



3. I did not care for this book at all. In fact, I read about 50 pages from a few chapters and threw the book away. Before you consider buying this book be aware the the author focuses a lot on the subconscious mind and emotional trauma from childhood and how he feels these impact a marriage. The book spends a lot of time helping you understand your subconscious and how your upbringing has screwed you and your marriage up. This may be the right approach for some people but I found it very cumbersome and honestly quite annoying. I guess I'm just not in touch with my inner child. Books I have read and enjoyed much more are Willard Harley's Fall In Love, Stay In Love - Excellent. The best marriage book I've read. I also enjoyed the 5 Love Languages.



4. Back in the early/mid 90's I was lucky enough to get this book recommended to me. I have shared it with many and continue to do so. I recommend this to anyone!!!! Better yourself, you will inturn better your relationships.
   Thank you!
   www.imthankful.com



5. As a psychotherapy training supervisor, I highly recommend this book for singles, couples and those professionals open to a different slant on relationships.