5 comments about If It Hurts, It Isn't Love: And 365 Other Principles to Heal and Transform Your Relationships.

1. Anyone who has had the great fortune to attend at a seminar with Chuck Spezzano knows that the daily principles in this book can be transformational. They are lessons which I try to live by. They are reminders that I have the power to make profound changes in my life and that all changes are my choice. They are lessons to remind me that I am not a victim of circumstance but have the ability to move past my issues and be happier and healthier. This book is essential for me to stay on my spiritual path and I keep it close by. I think Chuck Spezzano is a brilliant man who has searched his own soul and now chooses to share it with us.



2. This book is well thought out and explained. There are 366 passages, with a title/lesson and a through explanation following to incorporate that lesson. Each is given one full page (an extra for the lucky leap year.) The author's writing is spiritual in nature and full of much wisdom. You do not have to read this book front to back but open it to anywhere, to read just one lesson for the day.
   
   Obviously this book is way over the previous reviewers head. Heck this is a simple book with much wisdom but, you must be willing to do some self reflecting and have accountability for your actions, to make the magic of these words happen! If you do not have the patience to look within, then don't buy this book.
   
   I'd like to address what the other reviewer ('bunnyrabbit4') found so ridicules and I find so wise. This is paraphrasing of the authors intent. Principle #168, "If I'm attracted to someone then I have a gift for them." This means when we feel a certain pull towards another we have something to offer them. There is a reason why we feel a pull towards some and not towards others. The author explains that we should not enter into a relationship with the attitude of what can I get out of it. This is not about constantly doing for another or to just keep on giving to try and win approval, God no... but being the gift without expectations attached. The gift comes from our soul. #169 "If I give up being right, I'll be happy" We are so caught up in being right that we close ourselves off and block all else out. Wanting to be right at any expense comes from an inflated ego. We would rather argue to be right, then to be happy and have love in our hearts. We don't have to win every disagreement; we need to pick our battles carefully. This is a powerful one for me and one that I hope to master some day.
   The one most disliked by previous reviewer is principal #92 ..good ol' 92 about anger... We must be accountable for our own feelings. Our anger is an attempt to project on to another our own feelings, and pretend the very thing we are angry about has nothing to do with us. This is about being accountable. All anger is an imbalance in our own nature. We choose how we react to situations. A person can insult you and you can become enraged and blame your whole rotten day on them or, you can consider the source and even have pity on then. Why, because all anger is a reflection of how we treat ourselves. *Some of the titles of the lessons may not be so clear to some people but, the authors message is insightful and right on track.
   
   Also this book is great for a single person contrasting what another reviewer said. Heal yourself before you enter your next relationship, to attract a more healthy future partnership. Restated do not buy this book if you are trying to change someone else; it is only for those that are willing to look within. Hope this helps.



3. I checked this out from the library and am having trouble even thinking about having to return it. This book is full of good insights and advice on ways to change your thinking about your role in your relationships. A lot of the advice or principles remind me of things I've read from "A Course In Miracles."
   
   Divided into 366 lessons one per page, it's set up to be used as a daily devotional type book, and you will also benefit from picking it up and randomly reading wherever you land. You get a lesson, a blurb explaining the lesson and a bottom paragraph about how to incorporate this advice/ knowledge into your life today. I love that each lesson is short and straight to the point. You don't have to read several pages on a subject to get the meaning.
   
   I am so impressed with this book that I've gotta get my own!



4. This book is divided into brief page-size daily bits of advice regarding a positive outlook on life and relationships. I have personally found it to be a very perceptive and emotionally supportive book. If I could give it more than five stars I would. If you're having problems with your current relationship or simply want to make a good one even better, I highly recommend this book.



5. In dealing with others we always find ourselves blaming everyone else for our state of being/happiness. This book if used for those times of confusion, can help guide us to understanding the true relationship can only be about our "selves". Hold this book to your heart and ask your soul, your gut or whatever you choose to call it, to bring you to the page that will provide you with the best solution to understanding self. Over a period of time you will find your ego softening and your heart expanding. In knowing "self" we can finally be in place where all of our relationships are nuturing and loving.

5 comments about Broken Heart on Hold: Surviving Separation.

1. I bought this book before my husband moved out and it really did become a "friend". The author went through a long separation herself and it was encouraging to not only read some of her story but other women's too.



2. Often I refer to major relationship problems as a 'cancer' that requires rapid response to prevent further damage from the disease. A failing marriage often takes on the same traits as a major illness... the marriage is dying and without attention it will come to an end through divorce. Thankfully Linda's excellent book on the value of separation will be like chemotherapy for dying marriages and will likely save many of them from ending in a divorce because of the practical insights and systematic approach to come to a place of peaceful resolution on the road to restoration. It's invaluable from a counseling perspective and may be exactly what you need to save your marriage. This would be a great tool to give to friends or family members who don't want a divorce, but know that something's got to change. Structured separations may be the answer they are looking for and this book will show them how.



3. A good friend went through a separation. My marriage was strong, so I kept silent. After all, what did I have to say? But this book is written by someone who has walked in my friend's shoes. She understands how my friend feels because she has experienced the heartache, the anger, the loss, the confusion, and the hope that things might get better. It is a perfect resource to place in my friend's hands. It's written in devotion style, which makes perfect sense since my friend says that she's living one day at a time. Thanks, Linda W. Rooks, for writing this book for women who don't need pithy statements, but to know that someone else has walked in their shoes with hope and faith.



4. Linda - thank you so much for writing this book. I'm reading another Christian book on separation; and it does have good insight. But there is something so precious and valuable from hearing from a Christian woman who has GONE THROUGH what she is writing about. I identify with so much of what she says and, while I've only just started reading the book, and I'm only a few weeks into a separation from my husband, I have a feeling that what she says is real wisdom. Thank you so much. I would definitely recommend this book.



5. I found this book to be such a help when my husband left. Linda put into words what I was feeling and when the emotions surround and there is no one to talk to, reading the book helps to know you are not alone. She identifies so many of the different feelings going on and empathizes with the reader, but then gives positive direction as to where to place one's hope and trust during the turbulent time to find peace. I've already given a copy to a friend going through a separation and will do so again for anyone I know who is going through a similar situation.

5 comments about Every Woman's Nightmare: The True Story Of The Fairy-Tale Marriage And Brutal Murder Of Lori Hacking.

1. I too followed this story when it broke, and then on Court-TV, and looked forward to the book that would surely result from this case. But this wasn't it. The book jacket says the author is a veteran journalist, but at times he writes like a high school student. I could hardly believe it when I read this (p. 58 of the hard cover edition): "Mark inserted the key into the ignition, put the car into reverse, then into drive as he crept across the smooth asphalt surface of the parking lot." There's too much filler like this in the book. There's also way too much in this book about what Mark Hacking was supposedly thinking - and since the author didn't interview him, who knows what he was thinking? And the same goes for his actions immediately following the murder - who knows what he really did?
   I wish Ann Rule had written this one.



2. I couldn't put this book down. The adacity of this man... .it was her fault that he had to kill her because she had the "nerve" to berate him. When this crime happened I remember thinking "he did it" but his reasoning because she stood up to him. I hope he rots in prison. I hope all Mormen men don't think like this!



3. dont get me wrong, this story is one of the more interesting ive heard of- and thats the only reason i gave it one star (i would otherwise give it zero). the problem is, steven long's writing is so remedial and there are so many basic errors, i was distracted from the story itself. this writer, im sorry to say, is not a good one, and im quite amazed he makes a living off of doing it. i honestly felt like i was reading an 8th graders book report. aside from the fact that he does not know where to place a comma or a period, he also uses the same words again and again, instead of making use of a thesaurus and finding synonymns for them, and thats just not enjoyable to read. ok, i can be a bit of a perfectionist, but this is ridiculous- im quite sure there was no editor here, and if there was, he should be fired. and if you dont care about punctuation errors, you WILL care about the completely repetitive and junior-high style prose. if a good writer had written about this event, i wouldnt be able to put it down; in this case, i couldnt pick it up. i was way too irritated with all of the mistakes and uneducated-sounding text, and i just couldnt finish it.the back of the book states all of steven long's writing accomplishments, and i was shocked that he had any. i dont want to be flat-out mean, but this man did not do lori hacking justice- nor the true crime genre. if you are in junior high and dont know the difference between a talented writer and one who just thinks he is, maybe you can handle this read. anyone else, dont waste your 7 bucks.



4. Albeit before reading this book you'll know who was the killer. The problem with SL is that he wrote the mistakes done by the killer in the first part of the book. So the only quasi thrilling part was how they found the body and even that part isn't such a thrilling part. I also agree with others reviewers that the Mormon explanation at every part of the book is just excessive and boring.



5. not the page turner i was hoping for....
   i feel for lori and her family-and hope mark rots in hell for what he did to her/family
   but this story--needs another writer to write it!!

5 comments about Essential Manners for Couples: From Snoring and Sex to Finances and Fighting Fair-What Works, What Doesn't, and Why.

1. To a woman, much of the content of this book seems fundamental. But you know those stories you tell your friends about something insensitive your boyfriend did? Something that seems so obviously clueless to you and your gal pals? This book can help. I think that for men relationship etiquette doesn't always come naturally, and words of guidance from America's premiere etiquette authority can really help. Good luck!



2. I enjoyed this book. I agree with C Clark that it is indeed a book that men should read. A lot of what is in the book is just common sense courtesy and manners in a relationship. However, many people(mostly former single men) will want to be reminded of how to act in a relationship in order to be beloved by your girlfriend or wife and her friends and family. Peter Post is quite funny and he continues the Post tradition in providing etiquette lessons for us all.



3. What's the etiquette for sex, dividing the chores, snoring, where to go for the holidays, sleeping on the couch, getting along with the spouse's friends?
   The author reminds us that actions, appearance and words greatly affect our relationships. The recommendations he makes may seem at times to be obvious, but too often couples forget to base their own actions on "consideration, respect and honesty." He lists "Etiquette Imperatives" that cover the not-to-be-ignored basics for couples.
   Peter Post is the great-grandson of Emily Post and he wrote Essential Manners for Men plus monthly etiquette columns.
   The reviews have been quite favorable:
   *"Thorough...straightforward....Resolving those hot-button issues...may well prevent a public flame-out." (New York Times)
   *"stresses handholding and communication." (Atlanta Journal Constitution)
   *"Most of us could stand to be reminded once in a while to be nice to each other." (Chicago Sun-Times)



4. This book does a good job of addressing common marital (or co-habitation) problems in an objective way. It's a good reminder of how to fight fair and to think of things from your partner's perspective, something that often gets lost in the heat of battle. It doesn't really tell you anything you don't already know (or should know), but if you can remember some of the points and try to implement them regularly so that they become second-nature, it can make those annoying habits of others -- and yourself! -- more bearable. If you've tried to convince your partner that manners are important even (or especially) when it's just the two of you, reading excerpts of this book to him or her may help. It's very balanced, as far as the male vs. female perspective goes, and doesn't approach conflict as if one sex is always right. That objectivity improves its credibility.



5. We used to use good manners; but, it seems through time this art is being lost. When I came across this book I bought it and am not disappointed becasue it is very helpful, especially to enlighten your spouse in a way that won't offend. After all, my point is to make better relationship not build a wall between us. If you feel this way you will enjoy reading this book of today's good manners. While I may not agree with everything exactly because I still believe in many of the good old fashioned manners, this book offeres some etiquette that I hadn't been exposed to; like, snoring! and fighting fair...I think anyone interested in improving his/her manners or learning about what good manners even are today, this is a very good book. It even covers the 'art of listening' which too many don't do now-a-days. I recomend this book. :-)

5 comments about Sexual Secrets: Twentieth Anniversary Edition: The Alchemy of Ecstasy.

1. I bought this book for a class I was taking in college on human sexuality. It definitely presents a different take on normal sexual practices. I hadn't heard of the kundalini, or even the chakras, and other sacred sexual beliefs until I read this book. The author is long-winded and detailed, but that's to the benefit of people like me who are novices to Eastern philosophy. I read this book at length, and after my class, I gave it to my girlfriend, and we've enjoyed reading about some of the more uncommon sexual techniques described in detail (here's one: for deeper penetration, place a pillow underneath your or your partner's body during intercourse). The author also talks about the sacred aspect of sex, and how it can enhance your connection with your partner. Although this book isn't for everybody, if you have an open mind and are willing to try new ideas, you might enjoy this book.



2. Homosexuality is treated as a flaw to be overcome. It is said that practicing gay men can make no spiritual progress. Tantra and Yoga are offered as means by which one can cease being gay.
   
   Much of the historical notes were dated at the time of the book's original publication and only seem more so after so many years.



3. I often laugh at all those articles in men's and women's fad magazines that promise to reveal new "sexual secrets". You know which ones I mean . . . "Become an Animal in Bed"; "9 Ways to Turn Him On"; "Keep Her Motor Humming"; "Sex Secrets Your Neighbors Won't Tell You"; "11 Erotic Uses for a Chicken Baster" . . . stuff like that. The list goes on and on, ad nauseum. Geared towards couples who have their obligatory sex two times a week for 30 minutes and need new, neat little sound-bite ideas to keep things from getting boring. All heavy on fancy shtick and paint-by-number techniques, light on any real depth or substance.
   
   And so . . . I write this review to promise readers that, despite the poor choice of main title, this exceptional tome is not like that at all. "Secrets" here refers to holistic, ancient wisdom that celebrates the beauty and power of the sexual energy within all of us; sexual energy that permeates all of life. Thus the subtitle, "The Alchemy of Ecstacy", more accurately hits upon the truth. The word 'tantra' means 'interwoven'. The two authors have compiled a veritable bible of ancient tantric wisdom illuminating the interconnectedness of all things - an interconnectedness that has its most wonderful, powerful, and delicious expression in the sexual union between two people.
   
   Think of this book as an encyclopedia of sacred sexuality, albeit one not in alphabetical order . . . and not sold by traveling, door-to-door salesmen, thank goodness. It is a guide to everyday living, but not from a dogmatic perspective. It is a grand expose of everything sexual. The authors provide explanations of yoga poses, stretching techniques, and breathing exercises (for instance, to summon that kundalini energy up the spine). They even have small sections devoted to food, water, clothing, massage, worship, and service to others. But it also probes (pardon the pun) the depths of the stories of Brahma the Creative, Shiva and Shakti, and Vishnu the Preserver. And of course, there are plenty of sexual positions and sensual poetry. With pictures! We like pictures!
   
   The whole point is that, despite what organized religion would like us to think, we are sexual creatures and we should be celebrating that fact every day through our everyday activities. All of these things (eating, yoga, service, etc) ARE manifestations of our sexual energy - giving to and connecting with Life and with others. Cultivating that sexual energy (indeed, our very life-force energy and the energy that creates Universes . . . if you will allow my melodramatic flourish) is a constant, all-day thing. But not with the sole purpose of "getting some" or even "being a better lover". Instead, to connect with Source through sexual union and remember our Oneness. As the authors say in the Introduction, "It is for those who wish to use the sexual bond as a means to liberation and who desire to transcend the limits of the individual self."
   
   This book helped start me down the path of tantra and sacred sexuality a few years ago. May I humbly recommend it to others who seek the same.



4. First published in 1979, this popular book (over 1 million copies sold) presents a concise and articulate overview of the history and philosophy of sacred sex. Practical exercises and meditations are interspersed throughout. It will work well for people who like to know the background of what they are doing and would like to pick and choose and create on their own the activities they will do in their exploration. It overflows with wonderful erotic drawings by Penny Slinger.



5. This is an interesting book to say the least. There are many, many books out concerning Tantric and Taoist sexual practices few of them actually have anything to do with Tantric Yoga or Taoism. Tantra, in the West, is automatically associated with sexuality but in actuality sex is a very small part of Tantra. Tantra is a path(unlike vedanta)that tends to embrace all eight limbs of Yoga and all of the practices. In essence, Tantric Yogi's believe that anything can be a gateway to enlightenment and unity with the Divine. Surprisingly, despite the title of the book, the authors do a good job of outlining that holistic idea. This is more than just a book on sexual positions (which most books on Tantra and Taoist sex tend to be); if read carefully it outlines a good basic practice of Asana, pranayama and meditation as well as outlining the importance of male ejaculatory control so key to health in the Taoist traditions. Included in this manual are specific practices that not only help to achieve ejaculatory control, but also help to develop the Bandas (the physical retentions that pool prana/chi in various key chakras). If a practitioner were to remove the sexual aspects of this book they would still have a very good mind/body/spirit manual. Well done.
   
   Although there are no photographs in this book, there are plenty of sketches ranging from the very modern (drawn I believe by one of the authors) to the traditional (directly from the Kama Sutra, Taoist texts and Japanese block prints). The sexual practices are detailed both in writing and drawing and although the practices can't help but create deeper intimacy between partners, the true purpose of the practice is to move the Kundalini up the spinal column awakening the chakras and ultimately toward enlightenment and health.
   
   This book is not something to be read lightly, but a text book for those that have a serious interest in Eastern sexual and tantric (of the non-sexual kind) practice.

3 comments about Heartwounds: The Impact of Unresolved Trauma and Grief on Relationships.

1. This book uses a new lens to look at what is really going on in a relationship. It is an easy read and Tian uses language that is not too difficult for anyone to understand. The exercises at the back of the book are invaluable in gaining a greater introspective look at what makes you react in different circumstances. Unresolved grief is the problem that every relationship encounters. It is especially helpful in examining divorce and relationship interaction issues. Treat unresolved grief with understanding by looking at the whole picture and things will start looking up for all of us.



2. This book is one I reach for again and again in trying to understand feelings and behavior for those who did not have good models for dealing with loss, grief, stress, depression. The book has several easily understood charts and summaries to explain its points. But the author writes clearly and uses good case histories to (1) explain what happens to individuals in trauma and loss, (2) what they take into their relationships with others from the tragedy. The author offers much hope that people can work through the origins of problems which blight relationships and grow beyond them to be healthy and happy themselves and with others!



3. And I know that tag line sounds sappy...but I'm nearly done with this book; it has opened some new doors of thought and healing for me. Having grown up with an alcoholic, abusive mother, most of my life was spent trying to understand exactly what the heck I did to make this woman so rageful. There were other questions I'd never dared to ask. Like, "Where were you when I needed you?" "Why do I do the same thing over and over in my adult relationships?" "Why do certain things still sting?"
   
   I know I'm a "good" person and yet stupid patterns kept repeating, to the point I knew they had to be dealt with. Grief. We drag it forward for years, and it works itself out every chance - unless you know how process it, let it go, and move on. You can.
   
   Good book. Very good book.

3 comments about 97: Random Thoughts about Life, Love & Relationships.

1. OK, so say you have a 10 year old, who thinks she is 14, and you have friends who have a 14 year old who thinks any book on 'faith and morals' must be boring. Oh you could so change their mind with this book. My 10 year old begs me to read chapters to her in the car with her friends there - WHY? Because Justin Lookadoo is funny and hip/cool/happening/whatever your teenager says. I bought this book because I had met Justin Lookadoo at a booksellers convention, he's hard to miss. 6' 7" tall- not wide - and greatly weird looking. I thought anyone who looks like that and loves God...gets my attention. Then I saw his pic on the cover of this book in our Church Bookstore, and flipping through the book I saw how cool it looked not at all like a 'traditional' devotional book. And I was sold. I read three chapters to my family in the car on the way home. Read two more chapters to my friend the next day who is going to buy this book for her high school Bible Study. I predict this book will sell millions, and I plan on buying a great number for myself and friends. It's just the coolest book I've ever read for a devotional for teenagers, or those who wish they were teenagers, or those who rememer the teenage years! BUY IT NOW. You won't regret it. And you know "live with no regrets."



2. Justin Lookadoo has been busy since writing his 2003 hit Dateable (into it's 13th printing). He's qualified to write for Christian teens, not because he's a former juvenile probation officer and crime and drug prevention specialist. It's that he knows teens and speaks their language. 97: Random Thoughts About Life, Love & Relationships inspires teens to "live with no regrets" in an often confusing and tempting world.
   
   Each one of the 97 entries is different. Written in Justin's hip, conversational tone, it's got an edgy feel, certainly not a preachy one. His "loud-mouthed, skydiving, WEIGHT-LIFTING wife" brings to many of the pages a feminine point of reference. 97 covers the expected teenage topics but in a brand new way. For example, building self esteem is tackled with entries like "Hot or Not", a unique opener for dealing with the problems of comparing ourselves to others. And when has a Christian devotional ever held up the musk ox as a spiritual role model for guys?
   
   Relationships are huge in every teen's life, and "Anatomy of the Parental Brain" and "Relationship Flossing" are only a few to come at the issue from a unique angle. The Lookadoos address their readers with respect, in no way patronizing or lecturing. A Scripture or Scriptural theme is presented with each topic subtly and seamlessly, sometimes just barely mentioned or woven into the graphics of the page.
   
   Justin is inspiring. He wants us to ask ourselves "is it holy?" when we make decisions, and he deals practically with crushes and friendships and staying in groups to avoid temptations. You can't get more practical than "Deodorant and Soap", an aptly titled treatise on "heavenly hygiene". Taken as a whole, we're inspired to live like real Christians, to "...step up. Make a difference. Reach out. Go see your grandparents. Give a dollar to the dude. Don't let anything get in your way of doing what needs to be done."
   
   It was disturbing to read about the girl who gave away her beloved puppy because she heard on the radio that a very sick guy really wished he had a little Chihuahua. A gripping story of love and sacrifice, the idea seemed extreme. She could have easily gone out and rescued another dog for this guy. But the fact that I could not forget this story, for whatever reason, speaks to the stark intensity of many of the entries.
   
   With exercises like tracing your own handprint right in the book or timing out 8 seconds on a clock, there are no boring pages. None. The entries are numbered like a countdown, with a table of contents that indexes the titles. Not a daily devotional, it's more of a countdown to teenage wisdom.
   
   --Reviewed by Carol Kurtz for TitleTrakk



3. Okay, who wants to be a teen in today's world? I agree they need all the help they can get! Lookadoo gives teens a good reference book for their world from someone they can relate to. I am a grandmother and have seen our grandson have problems fitting in and yet wanting to fit in. This book gives great information in a way that teens can receive the information. Good book to give as a gift to teens and to families who want to understand their world.

5 comments about Get Serious About Getting Married: 365 Proven Ways to Find Love in Less Than a Year.

1. Get Serious About Getting Married is an entertaining book. Janis Spindel is clearly a livewire and her personality shines through in the text. However, the book did not really relate to my lifestyle at all and so I read it mainly out of curiosity rather than because I was going to take the advice given. The most interesting chapter includes a questionnaire for evaluating your life and looks, which was fun and informative, but the rest was less useful for me.
   
   The book is very much aimed at people who are wealthy and sophisticated and living in New York. Hence advice such as `manicures and pedicures are a must' and `you should go to the hairdresser for a blow-out (blow-dry in UK) and get a make-up artist to do your `face' before you go out on a first date'. For me, a date means I do my own makeup and wash and style my own hair and I personally don't know any woman who has ever gone to a makeup artist or hairdresser for a blow dry on the day of the `Big First Date'. Even someone who is well off might not be the kind of person who would want to go to a make-up artist before dates. Other advice was ridiculous, such as `always travel in business class in planes because economy is so awful'. This type of tip is completely useless to average women. People such as teachers, nurses, sales assistants, students etc can't afford to go business class. And economy class isn't that bad for goodness sake! Overall, the tone of the book is fairly snobbish.
   
   Obviously, all the advice is Janis's OPINION, and for that reason it will not suit everyone. For example, Janis advises that you should wear a skirt or dress on a first date because if you wear trousers a man will assume you have bad legs. What the !? Given how many beautiful women turn up to film premieres and the like wearing jeans or tailored trousers this is obviously not true. So, if a man sees Cindy Crawford in a pair of jeans he immediately thinks - `oh no, she must have really bad legs' - hmm, I wonder! Besides, who cares if some guys (allegedly) prefer skirts? If SHE prefers trousers then that is all that matters. If a guy's whole impression of you is based on your clothes choices then you're in pretty shallow territory anyway.
   
   The book also includes quotes from men that are pretty banal. For example, `There's nothing sexier than a leather skirt worn with boots or high heels' [Richard, thirty-nine]. The problem is that these quotes come from random, faceless men. If you asked another hundred men the same question you'd get exactly the opposite answer from a lot of them, and as a result, who cares what Richard, thirty-nine, finds sexy? The book is aimed too much at finding out what some men want and then cultivating yourself to be just like that. If a guy I was interested in liked women in leather skirts or purple nail polish or women who played badminton, I wouldn't transform myself into any of these things just because he liked them. Women should be true to themselves. Of course, one of Janis's rules is Be Yourself, but it is slightly unbelievable given the kind of advice she gives elsewhere.
   
   Some other reviewers have mentioned the fact that the book is a little shallow when it comes to looks. Of course, we generally feel better about ourselves when we look good and the better you look the more people who will probably chase after you. But it's not as if only super slim, great looking people get dates. Think about the weddings you've been to in the past. Were the brides and grooms you remember all great looking? I seriously doubt it. So if you read this book take the advice with a pinch of salt and live by your own rules and standards.
   
   Overall, the book is entertaining and worth a read for people who like to read relationship books just for fun. For practical purposes though, I think the people who will get the most from it are Sex and the City types who live in New York or similar.



2. Okay so I'm always complaining to my friends about how guys never talk to me...or about my lack of dates with guys...or just the fact that I hardly get any attention at all from the opposite sex...But I can honestly say that this book has really helped me see why I may not have been asked out before. I think an important thing that sometimes women forget that Janis reminded me of was just being a "girl." The simple things that men have loved about women from the beginning of time is what Janis is talking about in this book. The whole looking guys in the eyes and looking down to show the effect his words are having on you...going out looking good and feeling good about yourself and thinking positive thoughts...smiling while talking..or just smiling period is what men love about women. It shows confidence and femininity and makes you stand out. That's what's been missing with me.
   
   I think sometimes women get soo bogged down with the daily grind and with society that we forget to just enjoy being a girl and doing the girlish things that have been attracting men since the beginning of time. I can honestly say that since reading this book I've been asked out on dates at least three times in the past two weeks and attended a function recently where multiple men approached me to tell me how beautiful my hair, eyes, or just how beautiful I looked. By the end of the night my girlfriend and I looked at each other and were like wow. Cause I only had on jeans, a cute shirt and cute accessories...stuff I normally wear. But I really believe my new and improved aura was what made those guys say those things. What was I doing...I was smiling...looking them in the eyes...feeling good about myself...and just enjoying being a girl.
   
   I suggest everyone check this book out. It was a fun read and for the bad reviews on here..give it a break. Yes your friends might go out looking good or whatever but if they aren't displaying their femininity which is what this book is really about then they aren't gonna get asked out. This book just refreshes you on what you already knew all along but might not be doing. Thanks Janis!



3. The instructions in this book we mainly superficial. The main message was that as women we had to look sexy, our best, nails, hair, clothes. The questionaire inquired nothing of real personality. I was very disappointed. This was not a book for real people. This book is for those that make judgements only on the surface.



4. This book is a excellent guide if you want to be a soulless Trophy Wife. Or if you are a masochist.
   For anyone with even the smallest semblance of dignity or depth it is a laughable read.
   I myself probably spend too much time on cultivating my looks and style.
   But even I can recognize that there is more to life than surface appeal.
   I have found that MOST men are attracted by looks, but personality and the way a woman reponds to them and appreciates them is what ULTIMATELY makes them love and marry her.
   I feel sorry for Ms Spindel because she misses the entire point of what makes marriages click and what true love is all about.
   A very rigid and brittle viewpoint.
   I also take umbrage at how she she only wants like with like.
   At a talk she gave to a sorority at Columbia University earlier this year, she discouraged interracial and interreligious dating.
   That kind of thinking is repressed, nasty and judgemental.
   Also she spouts that the top three things men want in a woman are looks, thin body and a younger woman.
   Sure looks are important, but some men do like healthy curves. Not huge but healthy.
   And men want fresh and young looking women. But are not hung up on actual numbers according to research.
   Stay far away from this book if you have self worth and want a wholesome and real marriage !



5. I think this book is harsh and unrealistic. I also met the author (at one of her OVER PRICED parties) and find her ways of meeting people to be extremely shallow... I say, love yourself the way you are. You do not need to change for someone else. And if you do, who wants them? To her, if you are not a young, Barbie doll, you will never find love. I guess she must be doing something right. She is making a lot of money off of her advise, parties and books. I would love to have my money back!!!

5 comments about Baby's First Tattoo: A Memory Book for Modern Parents.

1. My mom gave me Baby's First Tattoo when I had my second child. Every time I look at it I crack up laughing. For three years I waited for someone I know to have a baby, and FINALLY I got to buy this book for someone else! If you actually fill out this book, you may need family therapy. Contact Dr. Phil ASAP. Every parent needs a good laugh, which this book easily provides. Need a place to save a smear of baby's first projectile excreta? Want to record the name of your nanny's first lawyer? Her second lawyer? How about a family tree with branches for everyone from Mom and Dad to "egg donor" and "Daddy's special friend?" Look no further, this book has it all!



2. This would be a great gift for new parents or parents-to-be. It's really more of something to look through and have a chuckle than an actual baby book to fill in. But, like I said, it's cute.



3. This is perfect for the new generation of parents! my husband and I love this book!



4. This is such a fun baby book.
   We bought one for ourselves and two more for gifts.
   
   Any new parent with a sense of humor will think this is a great shower gift.



5. This book is okay. My husband is a tattoo artist, so I bought this for one of his friends when he had a baby. It's just not quite as funny as I thought it would be. Basically they put all of the funny items in the ad, and there isn't much else.

5 comments about Nursing Your Baby 4e.

1. This book was very helpful not only in offering information while I was nursing, but also about weaning.



2. This book allowed me to successfully nurse my baby from day one! It is filled with both information about why nursing is better than formula, as well as with VERY positive advice and ENCOURAGEMENT from two nursing vetrans! It is an interesting and informative read. Contains LOTS of infomation on positioning and how to get started nursing from day one. Also includes sections on nursing the older baby and nursing problems. Makes you feel confident that you CAN nurse your baby! LOVED IT!



3. This came highly recommended to me by my Mom, who used one of the original versions. Even she was a little disappointed. I would like it if it were a little more sensitive to the less than perfect mom.



4. My mom had to buy me this book when I was pregnant because she said it was the ONLY thing that helped her continue to breastfeed me (a barracuda nurser). I couldn't put this down. I didn't find it preachy at all, and on top of that, WE ALL KNOW BREAST IS BEST!
   
   I still keep this book by my side even now (my son is 12 mos). Whenever I need a reason to continue or a pick me up, I read the history of breastfeeding. I'm in the 16% of women who make it to 12 months & I am proud of that. I'm happy that breastfeeding is making a come back and there seems to be more and more support for women. This book has been an encouragement and a motivator. I will buy it for every first mother!
   
   I liked Pryors' approach to this book. I read a few other breastfeeding books, but this one was the best overall - organized by history, breastfeeing basics, and trouble-shooting.
   
   -Born to Breastfeed!



5. Book arrived on time and in excellent condition. I have had this book before and ordered it for a friend. It makes an excellent reference, very encouraging with great suggestions. A must read for any first time nursing mom!