5 comments about Soul Love: Awakening Your Heart Centers (Roman, Sanaya).

1. This is a great book. I will tell you a story. About 3 years ago, I bought this book and only read the first few pages and put it down. I ended up giving it away and later rediscovered the book after having read CREATING MONEY. At first, I didn't realize that it was the same book I'd had before! This time, I loved the book!
   
   What makes this book so great is that it is very approachable. Orin's channelings are always written in a basic language that is easy to understand. I've read channeled books which have very complicated language that can be difficult to read if you aren't used to reading technical material.
   
   This book is filled with love. Every word is written from a heart -centered place and is designed so that you can feel this warmth inside of yourself.
   
   Now, onto the meat of Soul Love. This book gives you detailed exercises about how to connect with your higher self and receive its love as well as visualization exercises for healing your relationships and finding a soul mate. Being very honest, Soul Love makes no promises that it can't keep. It doesn't lead you on about what soul mates are or how relationships work.
   
   It is mainly a book for self-discovery and owning the love within your own being FIRST, and then loving someone else. The deepest kind of love is always with yourself and by knowing and loving yourself, then you can reach out to someone else.
   
   Soul Love is great because you can use it whether or not you are concerned about finding a soul mate. Maybe you've suffered abuse in your life or maybe you are discovering your spirituality and you want reassurance and guidance. This book can help. It can also help when you've had a painful experience with someone and you want to move forward. It shows you how to love yourself and that person from a place of universal love. You don't have to hold onto any relationship that hurts you, but you can hold on to the love that your higher self has for every person who has crossed your path, even someone who has hurt you. It gives you exercises so that you can make peace and move on.
   
   I don't think I can say enough about how real this book is and how full of love it is. I will say that it's not your usual book, so don't expect it to sound like other books (some of it will, and some of it won't). But if you are a fan of Sanaya Roman, you'll definately like this book. This is one of her best.



2. I love this book...it is absolutely one of the most beautiful books I have ever read..life changing..it opens one and connects them to the Pure Light and Love of their Soul... the best of who we truly are....There are no words....Thank you..



3. I am not big on "channeled information"...not that I don't believe that there are certain people who can channel the wisdom of ancient masters, but I believe that all of the wisdom, all of the guidance, all of the power that ever was, is, and will be is already within us. The only reason that the vast majority of us don't access this wisdom, however, is because most of us identify with our small "s" self rather than our Large "S" Self.
   
   After saying that, I do enjoy the 'Orin' series and have read quite a few of "his" books. The reason why I like these books is because there is a very nice, easy going style to them. There is really nothing too preachy in them. Most of it is all common sense...and after saying that, is there really anything common about common sense?
   
   Before I met my wife I had gone out with many women and yet they were all the same. Not only did they all bare an uncanny resemblance to each other, but they all acted the same. I seemed to attract women who were very selfish and aloof and cold. The last girlfriend I had before my wife was the last straw. I was determined not to go out with the "same" woman again. I decided to get to the "brass tacks" of the situation. I made up a list of everything I wanted in a future mate. This was recommended in this book. And then instead of looking for this in another, I had to "become" what I wanted to attract.
   
   I dated people who were very unattached and very aloof and very unappreciative of me because this is the way I thought I deserved to be treated. Not consciously, but unconsciously. I attracted women to me that were "unavailable" to me because I was unavailable for myself. I attracted rejection and abandonment because I rejected and abandonded myself on many occasions and so I had to really heal the relationship I had with myself. This is the real secret of relationships; the only person we are ever with, is ourselves. It may look like there is another person standing there, but every person that is in our lives (whether a positive or negative influence) is simply an extension of who we are on some level.
   
   I had a friend at the time that was there for me when I was going through my last breakup. No, she wasn't a short,exotic, dark haired Latina (the type I usually went out with). She was a cute, Irish redhead. She always supported me. She always appreciated me. She was just always there for me and the only reason I never saw her is because I was too busy looking at my own wounds, as soon as I began to heal, I saw this woman...this lovely, down-to-earth, spiritual woman and I asked her to be my wife.
   
   Despite all of this, however, she is not my soul mate and I'll tell you why, because when you really, really get this stuff, you won't be looking for one person to be your soul mate, the world becomes your soul mate. Every pair of eyes reflects back to you your light or your darkness, every person becomes a potential friend, every moment you share with another is either helping to heal the illusion of separation or helping to perpetuate it. This book will really help you to see how very, very important it is that you work on you so that you can be the best you can be. The world needs another "wounded victim" like we need another Bush in the Whitehouse.
   
   This book is a Godsend. Is it really channeled information? Y'know, what...who cares...just listen to your heart and it'll guide you to the very best.
   
   Peace & Blessings.



4. I have read a lot of books on spiritual subjects, and Orin / Sanaya books are so far the most lovingly written. I love the way they are so easy to understand, nothing too scientific or mysterious. They have put it like it was just common sense we human beings have long forgotton. As you read their books, you will feel that something inside has changed slightly. The power of the book itself is amazing ! While reading Soul Love, I feel like I am so blessed and loved !!! Thank you !



5. Sanaya has done it again! This book leaves you with a warm fuzzy feeling. Like all of her books, i highly recomend it!

4 comments about Pick-Up Lines That Work: Get the Girl Tonight!.

1. I love pick-up lines and this book delivers. "The Definitive Book of Pick-Up Lines" by Max Tucker delivers lines that have more punch and wit, however these pick-up lines have more conversational quality to them. Devon Wild is a P.I.M.P.



2. Pick up lines that work is a helpful book if you are trying to pick up girls!!!its an entertaining read and it is simple to learn the pick up lines. The special foemula in the book is near flawless. It makes me more comfident to talk to girls. GOOD BOOK overall!!!! pick it up!!!



3. Yes,there is finally a real book on pick-up lines.The author did his research.Its about time someone wrote a book on pick-up lines and how,when,where and why to use them.This book covers the lot.
   
   The book is divided up into various sections showing which pick-up line suits each situation.Not many corny jokes in this book so you're not likely to get slapped across the face or kneed in the groin.
   
   This is the book every guy should have.If you want to improve your chances with women then this book is going to be help you meet and pick-up women.As for the price the book is good value.It definitely a quality book not one of those books written by some idiot trying to cash in on singles.If you are going to buy a book purely on pick-up lines buy this book.Its the only one you need.
   
   Add this book to your collection of "How to pick-up women" type books and you will be a winner.



4. I thought this book had some really good stuff inside. There are lots of ways to pick up women without feeling ingraitated or like you're throwiing out stupid pick up lines. This book helps with that. I also liked and would recommend Dating Sense: The Practical Way to Meet, Date and Marry the Right Person.

5 comments about Breaking Free from Boomerang Love: Getting Unhooked from Borderline Personality Disorder Relationships.

1. Great book if you are leaving a relationship with a BPD, or if you are or were addicted to someone with BDP - easy to read! ... The humor and the spirituality are just right.



2. Most of the books dealing with borderline personality disorders (BPD) discuss the diagnosis of borderlines and treating the disorder. For the most part, those are for therapists and care-givers, or for those who want to understand what makes someone borderline and what they're going through.
   
   This book, though, is for the boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, and wives of borderlines: How being in an intimate relationship with a borderline makes you feel, what you can expect, what you can do to protect your own emotional health. The book creates the impression of being in a discussion with dozens of people who have lived through the experience, so it provides validation and insights that can't easily be found elsewhere.
   
   The author specializes in helping the significant others of borderlines (rather than borderlines), and has a website providing other support services. Many of her observations and suggestions may give the appearance of indifference to the borderline's suffering, but this is necessary if she is to faithfully serve her readers.
   
   I've read several books on BPD, and this one deserves a place on your shelf!



3. Reading this book was a defining moment in my life! I had struggled for thirty years in a troubled marriage. Always trying to please, understand and fix it! Blaming myself for the failures. Trying to 'make' him love me. It was as though a wall was between us. There was no intimacy. The emotional abuse was insidious. His narcissism grew with each passing year. Yet, I could never quite understand what was happening. He was clever enough to never push me too far. Just when he thought I was giving up on him, he would attempt a loving facade. He would 'hoover me' back in. Push/pull. In the final year, his behavior grew so truly bizarre that I almost had a breakdown.
   
   He lied to a succession of fourteen different therapists, quite successfully too! In an effort to help our relationship, I read many different books. The topics ranging from affairs, emotional affairs, passive aggressive anger, compulsive lying, sexual addictions, narcissism, obsessive compulsive disorder, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and bipolar disorder. Finally, the answer came to me in the form of the book Boomerang Love. This book, as the author so perfectly puts it, gave a name to my pain! As I have heard many others say, the story of my life unfolded in the pages of this book. I was astounded. I felt as though the author had lived with us for the entire marriage. I grabbed a highlighter and no page was left unmarked. I cried. I rejoiced. I had never heard of this personality disorder. Now I had some longed for answers!
   
   Oddly enough, just two months later his psychiatrist diagnosed him as having Borderline Personality Disorder. He denied it and changed doctors immediately. I gave him Boomerang Love and asked him to read it. He did so dutifully and stated, "This woman wants you to leave me". I corrected him. I pointed out that the author quite clearly stated that a person with this disorder can change if strongly motivated. I wanted him to read the book, because I thought he would see himself reflected in the pages and love our family enough to work towards change. Oh, he did see himself but was unwilling or unable to change. He grew worse because he believed that I was about to give up on the marriage. He was right. I struggled with him for two more painful months. I read Boomerang Love a second time. That was it, he was getting worse and so was I. I needed to save myself - as Lynn states in Boomerang Love: "I was the more valuable dog".
   
   When I read this book, it was as though an enormous rock was lifted off of me. At last I knew that I was no longer responsible for fixing this marriage. In fact, it was quite clear to me that it was an impossible task. Such a huge relief. The fact that it was almost impossible for him to ever change or improve strongly influenced my decision to leave him.
   
   I eventually sought out this author, Lynn Melville, and have had life coaching from her for almost a year. She speaks and writes from experience, unlike many of the therapists I previously had. She has lived with this devastating disorder in her life. She wrote about it having had 'on the job training'.
   
   I have been apart from my husband for over a year now. I am struggling to repair the incredible damage he has done to my family. However, my life is in a far better place than it was during my years of confusion and despair. I would recommend Boomerang Love as the most definitive book on Borderline Personality Disorder. It is an invaluable tool for understanding the 'crazymaking' one is enduring from a BPD partner. Check out Lynn Melville's website. www.boomeranglove.com This could change your life. I hope it does. No one deserves to live with this confusion and pain.
   
   GT



4. Each page of this book brings new revelations to those of us who have been involved and even still love a significant other or parent with BPD. It brings mental relief because the author so clearly defines what terror, pain, bewilderment and exhilaration we have been through. She provides guidelines in each chapter of how to be good to ourselves and reach out for spiritual support. The checklists alone are worth the read as you say "yes" outloud to line after line of perplexing BPD behaviour that you have never had detailed before and you thought you were the only person going through it.
   
   God bless all of us who love the BPD, as the author says, "we are the best of the best", the most giving, forgiving, understanding and loving people who have commmitted their hearts to loving these afflicted people. God bless the BPD's as well, whose suffering we cannot understand and who we do not hold entirely responsible for the harm they bring to us. They did not ask for the emotional burden and pain they battle every day. We can get away if we must, but they never can.



5. As a borderline person who spent a year and a half in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, I take great offense when people say that you should run screaming from borderlines, and that relationships with a borderline person are necessarily turbulent, unhappy, and something to be gotten out of. When I found a therapist who said BPD could be managed, even "cured," and that she would stick with me throughout the treatment (as opposed to getting sick of me and firing me as a client because I was too great of a suicide risk), I began to get well. I was able to enter into a healthy relationship with someone who was NOT codependent. I note that another reader said that the only way a borderline could have a relationship was with a codependent, similarly self-loathing person. This just perpetuates the notion that we can't get better, we can't be sane, and we are people who should fundamentally be avoided. The stigma around this disorder causes a lot of people who are genuinely suffering and seeking help to be turned away by therapists and partners over and over again. According to this book and the user comments, it's all about saving yourself from becoming involved in a relationship with a borderline, something to be avoided AT ALL COSTS! Is there a book out there that suggests avoiding any other mentally ill people, shutting them out, getting away from them? No. If you're schizophrenic, bipolar, or have OCD, you're allowed to have relationships, but if you're borderline, you should be treated like a leper. Where is the logic in this? BPD can be very successfully managed. I used to be in and out of the hospital at least once a year, but that hasn't happened in four years now. Why? DBT. Please, please, if you are in a relationship with a borderline, consider suggesting DBT to them, and make sure they know you support and love them. We can be wonderful, vibrant, talented contributors to society. Why not attempt to love us and support us in finding effective treatment, rather than listening to this book and abandoning us? This just perpetuates a cycle that can, in fact, be ended.

5 comments about The Other Side of Love: Handling Anger in a Godly Way.

1. If you have ever been angry, (which most people do get from time to time), then this book is a MUST READ! Don't leave home without it!



2. This is the best book I've read on anger management and teaching your children how to manage their anger. Gary Chapman's insight on why God created anger and what purpose it serves is very interesting. He provides summaries of each chapter, so you can review the main points without re-reading the entire book. This book gave me a new perspective.



3. This book was excellent. It helped me to evaluate my anger and provided useful tips to react differently and get better results. Anger is an issure that has popped up while parenting tirelessly on a daily basis. It helped to break down why I was experiencing anger. I love all of Gary Chapman's books and have found them very useful.



4. I highly recommend this book. When I first picked it up I was really skeptical and was expecting cheesy theories that aren't practical. Instead, this book is incredibly insightful, with down to earth examples that readers can easily relate to. The author is compassionate towards those who have difficulty with anger and does not belittle them like some other authors/counselors do. He provides a framework for understanding and dealing with anger and it's precursors and consequneces. Some of these ideas will be profound and revelatory for people, but this book was worded clearly and quick read.



5. I actually led study on this book in a Sunday School class. It has enhanced my life and my relationships, and I have recommended it to many others, who have also led Bible Study classes with remarkable results. The weekly class I am in (couples, all parents) used this as a launching pad to other books by Gary Chapman. This book addresses a topic we ALL struggle with, no matter who we are. It is good to see some great Christian literature address that anger is something we should learn to live with and express appropriately, not be ashamed of.

5 comments about Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy.

1. I think absolutely anyone could benefit from reading this book. It makes clear the link between our thoughts and our moods and gives concrete methods for conciously changing the thought patterns that lead to self-destructive feelings and actions. And unlike many self-help books, it isn't dry or preachy; it's easy to read and well worth the time. If you're depressed, PLEASE buy this book - it WILL help! If you're not depressed, buy this book - it WILL improve your life!



2. You do not have to suffer from full-blown depression to appreciate Dr. Burns insight into cognitive thoughts and how they affect your mood.
   This book addresses every aspect of feelings that drive negative thoughts about ourselves, guilt, anger, sadness, perfectionism. I had spent years reinforcing negative thoughts based on situations out of my control. This book lifted me to a level of awareness of this spiraling behavior and gave me the tools I needed to change it. This will be a book that you need to read, and apply. Remember, it took years to condition yourself to think negatively, give this book a chance to reverse that process! I have bought several copies and given them to friends who have benefited from it's read as a result of facing sad or negative situations.



3. Excellent read!! It doesn't matter how young or old you are this book can help you see yourself and life differently. It has helped me reflect on my beliefs and my life. What a true gift it has given me. It helps form a new way of thinking about negative thoughts and gives valuable strategies on how to use positive thoughts to really feel better about yourself. I highly recommend this book. If you are ready to view yourself honestly and are open to real life changes, than this book is for you.



4. When I began reading the book is was skeptical to try Dr. Burn's methods but I was also desperate. I have been dealing with anxiety and depression for a year and nothing was working. I started using the triple column technique every day, recording my distorted thoughts, identifying the cognitive distortions, and giving a rational response. After just a few weeks, I began to notice a reduction in my anxiety and I wasn't as depressed. Even though I have a long way to go, I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. I truly believe in the techniques presented in this book. I did begin to lose interest in the last few chapters as they go into detail about medications and I stopped reading them. However, the book is still excellent and I know there's a great resource on medications whenever I need it.



5. Este comentario va en castellano porque su máxima utilidad es para lectores no usamericanos.
   
   El libro es bueno, muy bueno diria, pero el lector no usamericano debe hacer un trabajo constante para "desusamericanizarlo" pues el libro tiene muchas cosas que solo son razonables para alguien que tenga membresía en ese marco cultural.
   
   En resumen: en medio de bastante ruido cultural hay buena información de caracter bastante "universal".

5 comments about My Mother/My Self: The Daughter's Search for Identity.

1. What I loved most about this book was that the women who gave birth to us are our mothers, but women who teach us life lessons are also our mothers. The definition of mother grows with our abilities to accept more nurturers and teachers in our lives. It is very important to accept the fact about our mothers that they were only human and did the best they could, but that's another life lesson that can ripple more globally.

   Ultimately, this book is about choosing mentors and tolerance for human frailties. I'm glad it's still in print.




2. This book was written for women, as such men will come away feeling that women are "really screwed up" about thier mothers, and while it does attempt to explain certian things, you do get the feeling that the author wants somebody to blame for the things that have gone wrong in her life... One wonders what her mother though on reading it, if she ever has.

   Personally I think "Our Mother's Daughters" by Judith Arcana (published by The Women's Press) is a far better book, a far better read for men too, especially if you want to understand the woman your mother is, rather than the woman you would have her be.

   I love my mother, I read her copies of both books, her mother is now dead, it took her a lifetime to deal with the pain, don't waste yours doing the same. Forgive and forget, we are only human after all.




3. It took me a while to get into this book... there were several occasions where I tempted to give up on it.
   
   I'm glad I stuck with it though.
   
   Those of you with a difficult mother/daughter relationship will probably benefit from reading this book. I know I did. Even though the author isn't a mother (which does bother me a little), I feel that her theories make sense.
   
   The version I have of this book is quite old and was published in 1977(I picked it up in a used bookstore). I'm not sure what type of editing has been done on newer versions but I'm sure the main message will be the same.
   
   My Mother My Self would benefit women who would like a deeper understanding of their relationship with their own mother, and also their daughters. Men might like to read this to understand the complex dynamics of these relationships.



4. Unless a woman has completley disconnected from her mother (successfully and has maintained it for several years) ... she stands a very high chance of being exactly like her or an extreme opposite to her instead of who she is as a unique person. This book by Nancy Friday explains why. One cannot cut the psychic umbilical cord alone, it takes effort, commitment, and intention to do so. A timeless book on how to heal and love who you are and where you came from while leaving the negative legacies behind.



5. This book has too bitter a spirit for me and seems more directed to women who have a sour relationship with their mother; or are not happy being a mother themselves and trying to deal with that. I cannot see how it is helpful or how it even fits into a mother/daughter help category; it seems to be Nancy Friday's personal tale of how her mother failed her and she is trying to explain why everybody else Must Also be Screwed Up and Unhappy. How is this book constructive and helpful? Not for me. Try something else, really.

5 comments about Book of Us: A Journal of Your Love Story in 150 Questions.

1. I wrote in this book for a few months before giving it as a birthday gift to my fiance on his birthday, he loved it and spent the next few nights reading it before bedtime. He was very surprised that I had spend time writing it in all my feeling for him when I first saw him and how I felt, made him feel very special. He still keeps in on his night stand even 2 yrs later. Love the book, helps to tell someone how you feel. Great questions and lots of room to write, really helps your feeling come out.



2. My husband bought this for me, I just love it. It is broken up by sections, dating, wedding, first year of marriage, middle years, later years. I think its such a neat way to keep track of things that go on in your relationship. We will have it for years to come and our grandkids can read funny stories that we would have otherwise forgotten.
   It is a very thoughtful wedding/shower or anniversary gift.



3. This book is great for chronicling events and memories of the couple. The format of the book is that there's a question prompt at the top of the page and 1-2 blank pages following for you to answer. I would say it acts like a great journal, but really one person only need to fill it up (most likely we can guess which of the couple will take time to write in it).
   
   If you want a book where the couple can really interact and learn about each other, I'd recommend: All About Us. It has some of the question & long answer-type format, but it also has series of multiple choice questions and short answer sections. It's a lot of fun, too!



4. I bought this for my boyfriend and I for Valentines day this year. I filled out all the parts I possibly could, and when I gave it to him I told him once we're on our way through getting married, we'll fill the rest out together.
   He loved it, it's a very sentimental gift and it's PERFECT to keep track of your growth together as a couple.
   I strongly suggest getting this if you're already married, or if you're with someone you know you want to spend the rest of your life with.



5. This book is okay - it is what it is. The pages are filled with many questions that you answer to help tell the story of your relationship with someone. I bought this book years ago and found that, since I was in my early 20's and dating, I couldn't answer a lot of the questions. There is a small section geared towards the meeting/dating part of a relationship, but most of the book is about marriage, kids, getting older, etc. It's a great book if you're many years into a relationship with someone. This book would make a great wedding gift.
   Another book I would suggest is called "The Story of Us" - it's the same concept with a more juvenile twist to it.

5 comments about Lube Jobs: A Woman's Guide to Great Maintenance Sex.

1. Not a bad book and a real easy read. It had some good info in the first part of the book, but as it went along it got more and more graphic and little far out there. Read it for the fun and let down your hair. I chuckled quite a few times.



2. Yes, I am a man, a man who has been married to the same woman for 35 years. And a man that has been married only once. With that said, I dropped this book into my wifes stack at the book store on a whim. I then found it was really written for women. Oh well, I'll read it anyway. Wow. Profound may be an over emphasis, but not much. When I finished, I handed it to my wife and told her "I would give anything to be treated by a woman like this". We have a good marriage and we have a good sex life (read "good" :). Let's just say, this made some "positive" changes in our relationship. Thank you Debra and Don Macleod!



3. This book should be in the library of anyone working on maintaining a loving, long term relationship. Candid, concise and actually are really good read.



4. Fun and humorous presentation of an important subject. The writer is sensitive and on target in a presentation of a topic that could have been too "clinical" or "distasteful" if not done carefully. Every happy and unhappy couple should buy a copy!



5. This book is absolutely insulting. It lies to women by telling them that women have less sex drive than men, (please ladies, take a university class on human sexuality and educate yourselves) and suggests to no-class women that they should simply put-out. This book completely degrades the sexual act from a equal reciprical activity and denigrates it to whoring off your body simply because her male partner cant respect her and her body. Sex IS NOT having a man masterbate using your body. Men who just luuuurve this book - grow up. No wonder this book is on the "bargain book" list. The picture of a 1950s women is appropriate.

5 comments about Living Through the Meantime : Learning to Break the Patterns of the Past and Begin the Healing Process.

1. Once again Iyanla VanZant gets to the core. Her book continues where "In the Meantime" leaves off. It give very clear and helpful suggestions to coninguing the work of self renewal.



2. This book is about realizing sometimes we are living our lives in between big events = the meantime. The author helps the reader understand this is a great time to get comfortable with ourselves because the more comfortable we are the more comfortable others will be! In a loving, comforting way she describes the steps which will help us reveal the magic within each unique person.
   Good book. Inspiring.



3. Anything by this author is great I would highly recommend anyone
   To read anything by this author Iyanla Vanzant The more you read
   the more enlighted you becomeLiving Through the Meantime : Learning to Break the Patterns of the Past and Begin the Healing Process



4. This was not my first book by her but this was the first one I didn't care for. I was very disapointed when I open the book. I was under the impression I would be able to work on my inner self. However, this book might work for others but not me. It ask me question that I was not able to answer. ex. Things about my mom. (mom died at early age) alot of the question I couldn't answer due to I don't know most of my family or know my family history. So I became very frustrated with the book an put it down and never looked at it again. I do feel if you have a strong connection or have been around your family enough you will be abe to work through the book. Good luck to other who might try



5. This is the perfect follow up for In the Meantime. On my journey to continue the healing process and grow this has been wonderful.

5 comments about Getting Your Sex Life Off to a Great Start - A Guide for Engaged and Newlywed Couples.

1. We've been preparing for our wedding and marriage (well, mostly the marriage, but wedding prep has to happen some time) and we've read a few books on sex. This was the best book so far. It's very informative and frank without being offensive. Some readers may find the Penners a tad too liberal (if they can't find a Scriptural command for or against something, they generally leave it up to the reader), but I found them dead-on. The book starts with the necessary relational foundation for sex and leads into the technical how-tos.
   
   The beginning of the book starts out like a pre-marital counseling session. My fiance and I have done our share, so we tried to do some of the exercises, but found them a bit repetitive (we did similar things in counseling) and fluffy (I wanted a book that just spelled everything out). Don't read through this book and put it down after the first few chapters, however. Especially if you don't like fluff. They are necessary building blocks to a fantastic sexual relationship and the Penners emphasize again and again that a good relationship that is open and honest and free is necessary for a healthy sex life. The rest of the book is pretty straight forward.
   
   The next few chapters explain the body parts involved in sex, and then explains the technical how-tos. Their explanations were very good and the emphasis was continually on not just having good technique -- but having a good relationship.
   
   Then they explain everything about the honeymoon -- how to plan a successful honeymoon and what [not] to expect on the first night. They really emphasize that couples should have few expectations so they won't be let down. They also explain how to maintain the sex life after the honeymoon.
   
   This book mirrors The Gift of Sex - both are great resources.
   
   I read this book in conjunction with Intended for Pleasure and I really enjoyed both books. I found this book was a little clearer and easier to understand, so if you have a choice of only one book to buy, I recommend this. However, if you can buy and read both, try to read Intended for Pleasure first (it's more technical and a bit drier) and then read this one. Or read them together. Both are great resources.
   
   I'm stil waiting to put knowledge into practice, but until then...



2. Great book for newlyweds. It runs through a lot of important information without making it too much to take in.



3. It's a fairly standard conservative Christian perspective on marriage and sexuality. It was recommended to me by a friend. I found it to be helpful at times, although a lot of the material I had been aware of before.



4. Great book for a Christian parent who wants a starting point for talking to an engaged adult child about sex and the honeymoon. The book is very direct and honest. It explains how to prepare physically, mentally, and emotionally for the "first time" and problems which could arise. It is also a good book for couples to read and discuss together.



5. I am a young woman preparing for a Godly marriage. In my early teen years, I was rather promiscuous and engaged in activites that resulted in a 3-year long battle with masturbation and perverted thoughts and desires and the guilt and shame that came with it.
   I bought this book hoping to move past all of that and into a holy marriage that continued to encourage purity of thought and action until the wedding night. I was greatly disappointed.
   Although "Getting Your Sex Life Off to a Great Start" has a lot of great material on love and commitment and some very practical advice on "the first time" and creating a romantic atmosphere and inviting God to share the experience, I disagree strongly with many of their suggestions. I am writing this review to warn those like me who are looking for a book that lines up with conservative Christian convictions.
   The book not only condones but encourages masturbation "in preparation for" and in marriage. The authors encourage men the masturbate before the wedding night to reduce the risk of premature ejaculation. I found this very offensive as I love my fiance and am not going to be disappointed if he doesn't last very long. Please hear me when I say that as a sexually-experienced woman, the performance isn't what's important; it's trust and commitment and being in it together, and when he "pleasures" himself without my involvement, that is offensive to me. I don't care how inexperienced my sweet, loving, gorgeous man is, I want to teach him and I want to enjoy how he touches me, not how I touch myself.
   Additionally, the Penners encourage engaged couples to participate in activites that "arouse" one another in order to "prepare" for the wedding behaviors. Additionally, they seem to ignore the Jesus' commandment that any man who looks at a woman who is not his wife lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. I am not married to my fiance yet. I am not his wife. By masturbation, self-stimulation, and engaging in "arousing" activites, I am encouraging him and myself to lust after each other, and this is adultery.
   As a final note, I am incredibly attracted to my fiance and he to me, and I disagree with the authors and would like to say that by choosing to stay pure in mind and thought and deed, we will be enhancing our anxiety for our upcoming wedding night. It may not be the best time and I may not perform perfectly, but we are learning together. We are connecting. And I don't need to teach myself how to be stimulated. I am waiting for my husband.