5 comments about The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.

1. Worth doing the full read & then understanding the score that your spouse ends up with.



2. For those who are clueless, ,which includes just about everyone, this book does show that our differences need not thwart our caring for one another. It is carefully researched and presented, and it is helpful if one pays attention!!



3. I loved this book because it taught me so much about how to understand and communicate with my significant other in his own language. I would never have been able to identify it on my own, much less know how to respond even if I could identify it. I have given the book to several other couples who have put it to good use. Of course, you have to have a significant other before you can put these principles into practice. Want to know how I found my lover? I bought Baby Boomer Bachelorette: How to Have Sex at Least Once More Before You Die and went into action. Even though I am well over 50, it only took me six months to find and become engaged to my fiance. We are so happy and, if you want to feel the same way, buy both these books.



4. I could have saved myself much heart ache and pain if I had read this book 20 years ago. I could have spaired myself the pain I caused my wife by becoming withdrawn and angery by her lack of attention towards me. If you truely desire to save your marriage, you must read this book. It will work miracles if you and your spouse will take a few minutes each evening and read it together. If they are unwilling, then read it yourself. It can still save your marriage if just one of you is willing to read and understand it.



5. Talk about something running out of steam. Was this guy being paid by the word? There was some incredibly repetitive stuff, and somehow it got moreso as it went along. I also object to the frequent Bible references. Cite some other things. Sure, even people who do not share the Christian faith might agree that Jesus was a great teacher. However, he's not the only teacher. The only footnotes throughout were to offer chapter and verse.
   So, okay, there's decent ideas here. They could have been delivered more concisely. Additionally, why include a chapter about the five love languages and children? There's a whole additional book dedicated to that topic that the author is happy to sell. Not everyone is interested.
   Yes, I'll find a way to adapt a few applicable things I've learned in my reading. One wants an investment of time to be worthy. I'd have felt the read was a more rewarding experience had I the meat to read, not filler, and would have been done reading it and onward to something else enriching. Or spending the time putting some of these ideas to use.
   The questionaire at the end, useless in Kindle format. Miniscule text in low-contrast faded text. It cannot be read at all.
   Overall, a high price to have paid for something that should have merely been a Readers Digest article. The book editor did not earn the paycheck.

5 comments about Sex Deck: Playful Positions to Spice Up Your Love Life.

1. The item seems fun and useful. However, my boyfriend and I were slightly disappointed. The positions were obvious and included the good ol' missionary, etc..I found a few cards to be a waste-the positions were just slightly shifted around and they were automatically new positions.So, overall we enjoyed using it, but it's nothing you can't be creative with yourselves!



2. Many positions we've done in the past and have enjoyed. The new ones we're having a lot of fun trying out. Gives a lot of variety in our bedroom.



3. I bought these cards for my girlfriend and I. Not only did they arrive in one day, they are totally awesome. To be fair, my girlfriend and I don't really need these cards to instruct us, for I have learned that we just know how to do all of these positions by instinct, but these cards are great anyway. We use them more as a game where we pick out a card at random and then go for it. The cards are very informative and they do explain the benefit of each position for male and female. Also nice is that the cards are very strong and designed well. I give this product 5 stars. They are good for people who are just learning, people who want to expand on their routine and people who are just looking for a fun way to spice things up. Hey, everyone needs a little something to keep things fresh and exciting... and these cards do the trick. Oh, you gotta get these!



4. My fifth anniversary was coming up, so I bought this product to spice things up in my marriage. The cards are a cardboard like material with the position on front and a description on the back. We had a blast with the cards. I left them laying out on the dining room table (no kids yet!) when he came home from work, and before long, we were enjoying a romp like we haven't experienced in years (before and after going out to dinner)! I also bought a book to keep the fun going after our anniversary night -Was that an earthquake? The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex. This book is written in a fun format (flip over), has a great tone of voice, lots of pictures and is easily one of the best instruction manuals I've read. My husband loves his side as well (cunnilingus). It is a solid bargain since it's two for the price of one. Both items were very helpful and fun to read and do!



5. THIS WAS GREAT AND WOULD RECOMMEND IT TO ANYONE THAT WANTS TO SPICE UP THEIR LIFE OR SWITCH THINGS UP

5 comments about The Road Less Traveled, 25th Anniversary Edition : A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth.

1. I remember receiving this book as a gift from an aunt of mine a number of years ago and reading it more out of an attempt to show appreciation to her than out of interest. Well, was I pleasantly surprised! Remembering this, I recently decided to read it again. M. Scott Pecks' Road Less Travelled is filled with deep, penetrating and original insights that most people at some level would concur are true. This is a book about spiritual growth, and specifically the author's view of how this can be achieved, and upon completion of it one cannot help but feel that he has succeeded to a large extent in illuminating the path towards such a noble, but difficult, objective. Many readers, after having completed this book, will feel that there is in fact meaning and purpose to life, and that is why this book can be a life-changer. That been said, however, do be prepared for some interesting surprises as you continue through it!
   
   Being about psychotherapy and how this is actually a route to spiritual growth (as Peck states, psychological maturity is synonymous with spiritual growth), one of these surprises was to find Scott-Peck become quite mystical and philosophical in his writing the further you read, but in a way that makes sense and is quite convincing. In addition, many people would think that a book dealing with spiritual growth would be related to Christianity and its concept of God, while in actual fact the book encompasses much more than this. Indeed, it struck me, once I started reading the parts on Growth and Grace that the author has tried to put into modern words and concepts many of the things which the mystics and great seers of the past taught and believed. This was confirmed when in the chapter on the Welcoming of Grace, near the end of the book, we read: "One way or another these concepts have been set forth before - by Buddha, by Christ, by Lao-tse, among many others. The originality of this book results from the fact that I have arrived at their same meaning through the particular individual byways of my twentieth-century life." Some readers, especially the more scientific-minded, may be put off by the fact that the book becomes mystical and philosophical the more we progress through it. Such readers should however stay the course as this is an excellent book which anyone can benefit from, especially since it also deals with psychology and how one can improve their life. There is much wisdom in this book. I myself am very interested in science and quite well read on the latest scientific developments yet I did not find the author's statements about things like the unconscious mind being God, or serendipitous experiences, a turn -off. I think one day we are going to find that there is far more to this existence than the mundane "blind, pitiless indifference" and accidental universe taught and believed by many leading scientists who are adherents to scientific materialism. But that is only my opinion. Most people would concur that there certainly are experiences and events which cannot be explained by science, which itself is far too preoccupied with objective, measurable phenomena than the equally real subjective and un-measurable phenomena.
   
   One of the insights provided in the book is the author's definition of love, which will be very different to what most people think love is. Real love is effort! Romantic feelings do (almost) always fade away! Love is not a feeling! To be truly loving is to make an effort for the benefit of another individual even when one does not feel like it or when it offers no direct reward to oneself. Nobody likes to make an effort because it drains your energy, but when you do so i.e. extend yourself for the benefit of another, then in many ways you are being truly loving. A typical example would be marriage. To make a marriage work when the romantic feelings of grandeur and excitement have passed requires effort, work and courage - i.e. the will to extend oneself for the benefit of another's spiritual growth. It was especially humorous to note the author's notion that romantic love, with its feelings of omnipotence and ecstasy (which is what a young baby feels when in its mother's arms - but which in the years ahead will have to grow up and break away and look after itself), is in reality a trap designed by evolution to snare people to mate in order to ensure the propagation of the species because the feelings always pass sooner or later and consequently most couples get married in total bliss unaware of what lies ahead. If most people really knew what marriage was all about and what lay ahead later on and how much work is involved in letting a marriage work, they would tremble at the mere thought of marriage vows and would not get married! At least, in the author's opinion.
   
   So what is the road to spiritual growth that the author lays out for his readers, and the underlying message of this book? We have lost our spirituality and sense of purpose and meaning in life because we believe in the mechanical nature of the universe, not in miracles. Science tells us that not only are we lost and insignificant amid the enormity of the universe, but that we are also helplessly determined by internal forces not subject to our will - by chemicals within our brain and conflicts in our unconscious that compel us to feel and to behave in certain ways when we are not even aware of what we are doing. Because of this we suffer a sense of personal meaninglessness. But once we perceive the reality of grace, our understanding of ourselves as meaningless and insignificant is shattered. The fact that there exists beyond ourselves and our conscious will grace, being a powerful force that nurtures our growth and evolution, is enough to change our notions of insignificance forever, because once we perceive it, it indicates with certainty that our human spiritual growth is of the utmost importance to something greater than ourselves, namely God, and that God's will is devoted to the growth of the individual human spirit. The reality of grace indicates humanity to be at the centre of the universe. The author further asserts that we are born that we might become, as a conscious individual, a new life form of God, and also that the interface between God and man is at least in part the interface between our unconscious and our conscious minds. Our unconscious is God within us (like the Holy Spirit). Spiritual growth is a process of the conscious mind coming into synchrony with the unconscious. The collective unconscious is God; the conscious is man as individual; and the personal unconscious is the interface between them. Being this interface, it is inevitable that the personal unconscious (subconscious mind) should be a place of some turmoil, the scene of some struggle between God's will and the will of the individual. Mental illness occurs when the conscious will of the individual deviates substantially from the will of God, which is the individual's own unconscious will. Our conscious self concept almost always diverges from the reality of the person we actually are. The unconscious however knows who we really are, and therefore a an essential task in the process of one's spiritual development is the continuous work of bringing one's conscious self-concept into agreement with reality, because our unconscious is wiser than we are. We live our lives in a real world and to live them well it is necessary that we come to understand the reality of the world as best we can. Many aspects of the reality of the world and of our relationship to the world are painful to us. We can understand them only through effort and suffering. People attempt to avoid this effort and suffering and ignore the painful aspects of reality by blocking and throwing certain unpleasant facts out of their awareness. In other words, we attempt to defend our consciousness, our awareness against reality. If in our laziness and fear of suffering (these two things being the impediments to spiritual growth, caused by lack of discipline and by non-love) we defend our awareness, then it will happen that our understanding of the world and our actions will bear little or no relation to reality, and we will eventually become `out of touch with reality' and be deemed mentally ill. But before this extreme occurs, we are given notice by our unconscious of our increasing maladjustment through a variety of means: bad dreams, anxiety, depression and other symptoms. Although our conscious mind has denied reality, our unconscious, which is omniscient, knows the true score and attempts to help us out by stimulating, through symptom formation, our conscious mind to the awareness that something is wrong. In other words, the painful and unwanted symptoms of mental illness are manifestations of grace. They are the products of `a powerful force originating outside of consciousness which nurtures our spiritual growth.' Psychic phenomena are also clearly related to the operation of the unconscious.
   
   The author further asserts that that are two forces at work on humanity: entropy and evolution (analogous to how these two fundamental laws work in physical science). Laziness is the force of entropy within us, pushing us down and holding us all back from spiritual evolution, because the process of spiritual growth is an effortful and difficult one, due to it being conducted against a natural resistance and natural inclination to keep things the way they were and to cling to the old maps and the old way of dong things ie. to take the easy path. But the miracle is that this resistance is overcome and we do grow. This force that pushes us as individuals and as a species to grow against the natural resistance of our own laziness is love - the will to extend oneself for one's or another's spiritual growth. Therefore love is evolution in progress. The origin of love (which is conscious and is the whole force of evolution) and of grace (which is unconscious) the author states, is a God who loves us and who wants us to grow. "We are growing toward godhood. God is the goal of evolution. It is God who is the source of the evolutionary force and God who is the destination" declares the author.
   
   One minor issue I had with the book is that the author could have included some exercises on how we may develop our unconscious minds and thereby how to manifest synchronous events, because, in his own words, "A major purpose of the section on grace has been to assist those on the purpose of spiritual growth to learn the capacity of serendipity. And let us redefine serendipity not as a gift itself but as a learned capacity to recognise and utilise the gifts of grace which are given to us from beyond the realm of our conscious will. With this capacity, we will find that our journey of spiritual growth is guided by the invisible hand and unimaginable wisdom of God with infinitely greater accuracy than that of which our unaided unconscious will is capable. So guided, the journey becomes ever faster." There are quality books (ie. not new age mumbo-jumbo) on meditation and development of human abilities that teach one how to do this, and perhaps the author could have included some exercises for his readers. But all in all, this is a very interesting book that seems to summarise the great teachings of the past in the language of our modern-day world and which has the potential bring meaning and purpose into the lives of many who need it.



2. I have accidently found this book and read it, This is an extraordinary book with great insight on the Life, conscience growth and Love. If you haven;t read this then you are missing lot of great insight which has been provided in the book. 5 star from my side



3. The Road Less Traveled is a classic that explores personal discipline, love, growth and religion. It is inward looking, insightful, sound and practical in many cases. There are some areas that are controversial, and this can detract from the material a little. But, each person must choose his or her own path...as the book points out.
   
   Scott Peck does an excellent job of presenting this material on self-reflection, analysis and addressing personal growth in a positive manner. Although the book was released three decades ago, it remains useful today.
   
   The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide to: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking



4. excellent self help book. a must read for everyone. You will be happy and successful in life if you follow the principles of this book.



5. I'm not one of those people who stalk the aisles of the self help section at all. But when someone lent me this book seven years ago, it was a turning point in my life. I've since bought my own copy of all three books in the series and have found it necessary to go back and read them from time to time (especially the first and third books).
   
   When I first started reading this book I couldn't fathom that the brand of spirituality that Peck offers was even possible. I had discarded all spirituality since childhood because I had learned early on about the hoorors of religion. More than anything, this book spurred me to start along the path to discovering my own sense of spirituality and my own life philosophy. It also helped me to think in more complex terms and beocme more comfortable with ambiguity and contradiction...reality essentially.
   
   This book should make you uncomfortable when you read it for the first time. You have to be uncomfortable to evolve. I am grateful for having come across it at a relatively young age because my life has been better for having read it.

5 comments about Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex.

1. 
   This is among the best books that I have read on building loving male-female relationships. I gained valuable insights about men and women and this helped me to understand my moods and actions and those of my wife. I could clearly see myself being vividly described by the author. I can plainly make out where I need to change to become an understanding and caring husband without being as I always tended to be "Mr Fix-It" when my wife talks about problems or issues bothering her.
   
   I now appreciate the value of cherishing my wife to motivate her. I no longer get surprised when I hear women expressing their feelings through various superlatives, metaphors and generalizations. I now know that men and women communicate differently; they love, think, feel and perceive things differently as though they are from different planets. The book provides useful and helpful problem solving techniques that have greatly helped me in my relationships with women.
   
   I would like to thank John Gray for helping me to learn that my differences with my wife are normal and that the difficulties we have often experienced in our relationships have also been experienced by other couples and that these differences, when understood, help to cement strong and lasting relationships.
   
   I, therefore, highly recommend this classic which highlight strategies for reducing tensions in relationships and strengthening love through recognizing differences between men and women.



2. This book is brilliant at best! Gray's philosophies keep you engaged while teaching you the simpler way of understanding your partner AND yourself.
   
   I have learned much about myself as well as the Martian in my life. I didn't feel so alone since many people obviously go through the same experiences.
   
   A compliment to any relationship in life!
   
   Merna Throne
   
   Pocket of Pearls: A 30-day pocket workbook to start hearing a softer voice inside of you!



3. I read this book as a proactive measure to gear up for a permanent full time commitment. I can say that most of the sample phrases inspected in this book have been hurled at me, or hurled by me at one time or another, in relationships I've had long before Mars/Venus was published. If I had known then the info provided in this book, I'd probably be married with the kids going off to college by now.
   
   But let's look at why I think this book will work for you. It's been over fifteen years since this title came out. (I remembered people lampooning and dismissing it when it first hit the market and became a sensation) This book could be seen as part of the movement in the nineties where men became the kinder/gentler men we see all around us today. I'm aware that not everyone wants to be seen as or wants a kindler gentler man. But in the course of men becoming softer in the nineties, women made an accompanying move towards a hardened masculinity in the whole "grrrls rule, boys drool" attitude. As a result, the gender lines between respective behavior have been blurred considerably. Anyone could pick up this book today and see a little of themselves described on both planets.
   
   There are helpful ideograms presented here (men=rubberbands, women=waves, men go into and returning from caves, women descending into and arising from their wells). It's all about cycles and rhythm, and believe it or not, men have their own too. The importance of communication and how and when to say what are tools everyone should have in steering clear of an argument, a major relationship killer. The anatomy of an argument is also analyzed in detail. The book ends with how to ask for support and a useful psychological revelation: when you feel safest and loved, painful memories from the past will surface. It shows you that you may mistakenly attribute those painful feelings to your partner when you shouldn't.
   
   There is also an effective chapter on the subtle linguistics of asking.
   
   There's bound to be many knee-jerk reactions from readers all around. People have continued to oppose this book based on the stereotypes it makes, not on its effectiveness. I for one, am very resistant to self-help books. I have returned advice books for refunds and even hurled some at the wall in disgust.
   
   What's important for me is that books, like movies, music, news, and peer-pressure work collectively to shape who we are and how we behave. Since the publication of this book, its advice and examples have worked itself into the consciousness of how partners (in a certain socio-economic group) behave, express themselves, and interact with each other. I can't count how many times I've heard some of the phrases in this book uttered between friends who are in relationships. Even though many have not read the book, they are utilizing variations of its examples in their every day speech.
   
   With divorce rates ever on the increase, I'm quite certain if you were to walk away with 10% of the information presented in this book, regardless of which gender group you culled the advice from, you would have already disproportionately increase the probability of your relationship succeeding.



4. A catchy title coupled with some insightful thoughts about the differences between men and women has made this book a multi-million seller. Men from Mars Women are from Venus explores the differences between the needs and communication styles of men and women. The book is written primarily for both men and women over twenty five.
   
   John Gray explains that men and women are so unlike each other that they might as well be from different worlds. For several years before this book was written many felt it was improper to discuss gender differences. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and other books like it fed this oppressed need. The high volume of sales reflects the desire that men and women want to learn more about each other.
   
   John Gray makes some significant contact with his readers on some key issues. For example, Gray argues that men mistakenly offer solutions to problems (problem solvers) and inadvertently invalidate feelings. Women tend to offer unsolicited advice and direction.
   
   Another important concept that Gray explores is that men aren't always willing to discuss what is bothering them (John Gray calls it going to their cave). Women want to address relationship issues immediately. Gray explains that understanding male and female differences helps a couple to accept each other and work together for a better relationship.
   
   Although very good in some important places, it is lacking in others. The shortcomings of this book need addressing. First, Gray generalizes male and female characteristics without adequately addressing individualism. His generalizations oversimplify how men and women act and react.
   
   Next, Gray doesn't adequately address the similarities between men and women. In some cases he goes out of his way to show how men and women are different when it can be easily argued that they are alike. For example, John Gray writes that the primary love needs of women are: caring, understanding, respect, devotion, validation, and reassurance. He says that the primary love needs of men are trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, approval and encouragement. Gray ignores that men need caring, understanding, respect, devotion, validation and reassurance and women need trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, approval, and encouragement.
   
   Some people take Gray's thesis as gospel without questioning its validity. For example, a book published in 1995 book entitled: He's OK She's OK: Honoring the Differences Between Men and Women by Jeannette Lofas, and Joan MacMillan quotes the love needs of men and women noted in John Gray's book without further question or comments. The point Lofas and MacMillan are trying to make is to accept the differences between men and women. This is well taken, but using a quote from John Gray's book without exploring whether these needs are really gender specific makes this part of He's OK, She's OK lacking. What's unsettling, is that if two writers who have researched male female characteristics take John Gray's book without question, won't many readers?
   
   This book's biggest contribution is helping many people to become aware of the differences in needs and communication techniques of themselves and others. Although there are some drawbacks, Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus has some useful information for individuals who want to improve their communication and relationships with the opposite sex.
   
   Overall, an interesting read...but caution is advised!
   
   The Re-Discovery of Common Sense: A Guide to: The Lost Art of Critical Thinking



5. Only people of compatible personality types can have a great relationship. You won't know what personality type you are unless you invest your money in Socionics by Rod Novichkov. Communication problems start with misunderstandings and misunderstandings are from the way we process information and give out the answers. Only C1 partners (you'll know what that is if you read Socionics) have the right combination of compatibility where when you say "Honey, I want to be left alone for a few minutes because I want to think things over" means just exactly what you meant to say and nothing more and your partners understands it that way.

5 comments about The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.

1. The title may put people off, but the content of this audiobook/book is excellent and will help couples greatly. I enjoy the audiobook as I can listen in the car and I've listened twice now to the book. It's very informative and practical advice for improving lives. Highly recommended.



2. I truly enjoyed and got a lot out of Dr. Laura's Proper Care And Feeding Of Marriage, however The Proper Care And Feeding Of Husbands is a bit insulting to women. I've actually been the wife who's husband had an affair and I can honestly say, I didn't drive him to it.... What are you thinking Dr. Laura?



3. I love this book and bought it for a good friend of mine who is getting married soon. It is one of the best books that can help a woman understand her husband or men in general.



4. This is an awesome book that strengthened my marriage. As a result, my husband is even more helpful around the house than he used to be. I highly recommend reading it with an open mind. If you are not willing to give 100% to your marriage after reading this, good luck keeping your marriage alive & healthy.



5. I give this book (along with a similar book by another author targeted to men) to young engaged couples (and recommend it widely to others).
   
   A lot of the men read her book. They rave about how well she gets it. She says "men are simple creatures". The men agree (we are simple creatures, truley we are). She explains how to interact successfully with men. The men say she has it exactly right.

5 comments about Tickle His Pickle: Your Hands-On Guide to Penis Pleasing.

1. This book helped me. Of course I'm a beginner and this was a breeze to read and it kept me interested without feeling bored or lectured. I'd recommend it to anyone, it's more information than they let on.



2. This book is one of three I would recommend to learn all about oral sex. Taken from a couple's point of view, I would recommend this one for fellatio and The Master's Guide to Cunnilingus: How to Perform Successful Oral Sex and Provide the Highest Degree of Pleasure Possible for cunnilingus. To complete your library and for an interesting switch, try Was that an earthquake? The Sensuous Couple's (Flip Over) Guide to Seismic Oral Sex. This is a fantastic flip over guide for COUPLES that contains virtually any information you might want to know. Cunnilingus is covered on one side and fellatio on the other. These are three great books, fun to read and heavy on content. Try all three!



3. I added this short but pleasing little number to my library of sexual manuals that I purchased to spice up a five year old marriage. I found it informative and entertaining and especially fun to read!



4. I ordered this book thinking it would help me with the tricky task of preserving a hoard of over-ripe vegetables, recently harvested from my garden.
   
   I imagined reading about the merits of low-temperature pasteurisation, drooling over pictures of crab apple jelly and studying recipes for spiced red cabbage.
   
   To my horror, this book contains none of these delights. It is, in fact, dedicated to the non-reproductive, carnal pleasuring of men.
   
   Am I the only person who was fooled into purchasing this lewd handbook by the opaque title and the misleading cover - which clearly shows a pickle-waving housewife beaming with pride at her culinary success?



5. Even if you're sexually skillful, you can stand to learn more illustrative and explanatory things about penis-fun.

5 comments about He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys (The Newly Expanded Edition).

1. Don't ruin your life with this foolish book. First off, Greg Behrendt is a stand-up comic, not an expert. Second, his "research" consists of emailing questions to a handful of personal friends. Furthermore, he comes across as being a narcissist and clearly a very controlling personality. I suppose if a woman wants to attract a narcissist, a Scott Peterson-type sociopath, a controlling abuser, or an obsessed stalker, then this book will be a very handy tool.
   
   Adult men who come on like gangbusters in beginning are either desperately needy or have extremely shallow emotions, and are most likely either narcissistic or sociopathic or at least controlling. Period. These men lack the depth of emotion necessary to feel real love - otherwise it would take them some time to let it grow. What "love" is to them is being instantly infatuated with a woman's appearance and suitability. That wears off in time and they drop you like a hot rock for the next infatuation. Be wary of the ones who are "really, really into you" right off the bat, and if they are extremely charming, doting and flatter you a lot, RUN! Think about Amber Frey.
   
   Also, he never reveals the number one reason a man loses interest in a woman: she has sex with him too soon. It's a double standard, but it's the truth, so deal with it. No man truly appreciates an easy woman. If Behrendt had an ounce of sense he would have said on every page to wait at least a couple of months, and definitely once exclusivity is mutually agreed upon, before consummating a relationship. Instead he rants on and on about NEVER, EVER calling a guy. That is ridiculous. All the nice, normal guys I know have a three try rule: if she doesn't call you back after three tries, leave her alone because she isn't interested. Only the most dangerous of men will keep pursuing a woman who never calls him back.
   
   There are so very many misleading notions in this book that I could go on for pages, but essentially Behrendt has everything upside-down and backward: he advises to make it darned near impossible for a man to even get your phone number, unless he behaves like a desperate stalker, but then once you go out with the guy, you can feel free to immediately have sex and expect him to call you daily and act like you're in an established relationship - all in the first few weeks! In reality, you should let a man you like have your phone number, but then make him court you and work hard to EARN your trust and affection over time as you get to know each other, let real love blossom, and BUILD UP to an established relationship before sex becomes part of it. Duh!
   
   The best book in the world on the subject of relationships is "Why Men Love Bitches" by Sherry Argov. It is very well researched and is based on interviews with many hundreds of men and women from all walks of life. It is written with great wisdom and humor and will explain everything you need to know about men and dating, such as why men don't call (not necessarily a reason to dump them); why you must wait to have sex; what drives men away; how to rekindle a man's interest; etc. Most importantly, it teaches women how to get into, and stay in, the driver's seat at all times. It transformed my dating life overnight and I haven't had trouble understanding men since.
   
   John Gray's Mars and Venus series is excellent, too.



2. As corny as it sounds, this book turned my love life around. For years I made the rounds with guys who wasted my time. This book "laid down the law" in very concise and light-hearted manner. I quickly recognized the symptoms and got rid of the time wasters, found a guy who was truly interested and now been happily married for 1.5 years!!!



3. Although this book seems intended for women who have never been married before, as a recent divorcee, I found this book had a lot of good advice. I wish I had read it before I married the first time! Now dating for a second time and really the first time as an adult, its helped me understand why men act the way they do. The letters interwoven in the book really help illustrate exactly how men are not really into certain relationships. I, like Greg, know there is someone special out there for me and feel I can better decipher when to get out of a dead-end relationship and get to the relationship I'm meant to have. I've passed the book onto my 18 year old niece so she'll be smarter as she dates. Thanks Greg and Liz!



4. The theory on how to handle guys and relationships in "He's Just Not that into You" can certainly be seen as very controversial, and perhaps women may initially find it to be offensive. But after reading the book I'd have to say it's the most liberating piece of literature that I have ever read. A few months prior I had broken up with a boyfriend of two and a half years and was in another budding relationship when I started the book. Not only did I get closure from the one, I realized my current relationship had hit a dead end. I hate feminist literature, but I'd have to admit that this book is empowering. It teaches women to take there life and their love into there own hands and it genuinely hopes to prevent women from being jerked around anymore by the slew of awful guys that are out there. I would recommend this book to every woman I know, especially my closest friends and family. With an open mind and a willing heart, this book is an invaluable tool to every soul out there.



5. All you single women need to read this book!! I'm sure we've all had a guy like that at one time or another...oh and the book arrived in a timely manner and was in great condition :)

5 comments about The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed.

1. Don't get me wrong--Mystery is a pioneer, definitely knows his stuff, and has great insights into the art and the structure of pickup. However, I found this book's presentation to be awkward, somewhat difficult to read, with many forward references to topics not yet covered. There are many gems inside that are well worth discovering, but, due to the disorganization, I would recommend some other book for beginners (perhaps Magic Bullets by Savoy). Then come back and read this one once you've gotten the basics down.



2. I learned of Mystery after reading the very excellent "The Game" by Neil Strauss which delves into how Strauss penetrated the society of pickup artists. This book on attracting and scoring with women has it fine points on body language, treating yourself as the prize instead of the woman to whom you're attracted, and how seeming uninterested is better than telling a woman up front you're attracted to her.
   
   On the downside, the book reads like a thick military instruction manual full of unneccessary jargon (i.e. IOIs, DHV, and AFCs sometimes had me saying WFT?). Reading it once would not be sufficient. You'd have to read it over and over again to grasp what it's saying and would probably need a bit of video support to help you. It relies on sweeping assumptions that most women think alike. (I wondered how his material would work in the hood or in a foreign country where customs and culture are different than ours.) Also, it doesn't address how very unattractive men can better themselves. I don't care how much material you use, if you're butt ugly and broke you will be shut down. Finally, it doesn't address what to do when the image you're portraying doesn't match your reality. What if you drive a Pinto? What if you live in a trailer? What if the first thing she asks you is where you live and what you drive?
   
   Bottom line: I do believe the material in this book can dramatically increase your chances of meeting beautiful women and having sex with them. If that's what you're looking for, buy and study this book.



3. Hey, he has proof it works. And you game can never be too sharp.



4. This book was decent. I like some of the techniques, such as learning how to tell stories effectively, body language, establishing an identity, being interesting, etc. But, I can tell this is directed towards socially inept types, guys that have zero social skills. If you are a confident MAN, with a life that you are passionate about, you should do fine with women.
   
   But most of the people that read PUA material dont want to hear that. They want the quick fix . They wanna learn techniques, or the latest opener to help them "score" with a women. Do you really think in order to get the girl, you must DHV and then NEG her, while simutaneously charming her friends? The game really isnt that serious. There are so many easier ways to meet women, the best way being through a mutual friend.
   
   However, with all that being said, I think this book is worth the read. It has good information on social dynamics and on cold approaching. The read can get kinda dry and informative, like reading a scientific journal on rainforest plants. Also, its kinda complicated, because he has so many terms to learn. Still, it can help you become a better improv speaker, as well as approaching strangers effectively.



5. Now that the word is out, is this book worth buying? A year ago, I felt so. Like many others, I bought it with the intent of discovering the secret formula to meeting new people, especially those I don't normally approach.
   The Mystery Method (MM) outlines beautifully the Attraction, the Comfort and the Seduction and stresses you have to practice them in that order. If done correctly, the 'Target', as she is called, will not know she is being picked up. The nightclub setting scenarios are only good if you happen to be a bar-fly. While Mystery, no doubt, experienced numerous rejections and learned through trial and error what worked, the only value MM has now is it's an entertaining read.
   Presently, I can vouch that MM will make you a better friend, coworker, and even more interesting to those you don't know, but it won't help you find love. There's no secret formula for that. When you meet someone, there's either an instant connection or there isn't.
   Read or listen to it for entertainment value only, but don't take it too seriously.

5 comments about Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples, 20th Anniversary Edition.

1. A lot of good stuff in here to offer some help, but nothing magical.
   Not a chore to read however like many books on the subject.
   For a few things I did get from it that helped my life I would call it a good purchase and it deserves 4 stars.



2. Before counselor Harville Hendrix, Ph.D. teaches you how to improve your relationship, he asks you to think about why you were attracted to your partner in the first place. The answer, he explains, is that you were looking for a mate who possesses the same basic qualities as your parents. Why? Because people subconsciously seek relationships with those who will exorcise their childhood pain. Unfortunately, most people tend to reopen - as opposed to healing - these wounds in their adult liaisons, leading to the "power struggle" that ensues in many relationships. Hendrix and his wife, Dr. Helen Lakelly Hunt, say that the way out of this destructive cycle is to practice the tenants of "Imago Relationship Therapy," which they created. Their therapeutic approach includes making a true, lifelong commitment, treating each other in a loving manner, learning how to communicate constructively and eliminating negativity from your relationship. You may well find some benefits in the Imago approach even if you don't fully buy Hendrix's basic parent-seeking premise. The authors have trained some 2,000 therapists to use this approach, although Part III offers solid exercises you can do yourself. If you are seeking a relationship self-help book that discusses how to avoid getting hurt, how to deepen your communication and how to build a long-term connection, getAbstract recommends this bestseller.



3. Fantastic easy to understand information, very helpful for young couples or people who have been together for many, many years. The advice and suggestions are easy to implement and have already made a huge difference in our lives. This author provides simple remedies providing hope for couple who need assistance for creating the relationship of their dreams.



4. Came very fast, just as ordered, I would order from here again. Awesome, Awesome book!! I can't say enough. Answers every question you ever had about a relationship. Even though Harvey is a minister, he is also a PHd, and his book is more psychological than religious in any way. I would highly reccomend this book to all couples, and to anyone who is interested in making a relationship work.
   Great! Thanks very much!



5. This book was right on I reviewed it many time. I gave it four stars because the book was simple and made since. Nothing complicated. The reason it did not make 5 stars is because it only relates to people in a relationship. Not those looking.

No comments about Pure Romance Between the Sheets: Find Your Best Sexual Self and Enhance Your Intimate Relationship.