5 comments about The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.

1. I found this and kept an open mind, but I just couldn't get past the negativity this book was full of. I absolutely agree that women do silly things to their men - nag, complain, whine, withhold affection, and so on. And I agree that women oftentimes would have happier husbands, happier marriages, if we stopped.
   
   However, Dr. Laura seems so hell-bent on showing us how mean, critical, emasculation we women can be that she misses the whole aspect of - "Ok, got it, how do we change?"
   
   Yes, "Stop nagging" is simple advice - and Dr. Laura does say that. But if I'm nagging it's because SOMETHING NEEDS TO GET DONE AND HE AIN'T DOING IT!
   
   Dr. Laura advises we "give it up" more often to our husbands - I agree, having children, a busy home, work puts a huge damper on romance. But that alone doesn't repair the damage done or replace bad habits with good.
   
   I would have appreciated more concrete advice on how to stop doing the nasty things that can break down the marriage by replacing them with POSITIVE action.
   
   I found that in The Surrendered Wife: A Practical Guide To Finding Intimacy, Passion and Peace, which, while absurdly patriarchal at times, did offer solid ways I could improve our marriage. I'm a do'er - what can I *do* to fix things - and "The Surrendered Wife" was a great well of ideas (some of which I laughed at, but many of which I found value in).
   
   By the way, I earn all the income for our family and am a far cry from traditional and/or religious values, but I so still see that men like to be treated like men, my husband included, and I'm willing to use what I can from books like these and leave the rest. My being a little softer, a little kinder and even a little less of a b*Tch, is never a bad thing.



2. What a wake-up call this book was. Having been raised by and as a feminazi (but having long since come to my senses and recently having discovered Dr. Laura's radio talk show), this book revealed a lot of common-sense truths that almost seemed too easy, too good to be true.
   
   Truths such as, treating your husband nicely will encourage him to treat YOU nicely. Truths such as, being demanding and selfish and insisting on financial and personal independence prevents family stability (which is what we women, and our children, really, truly do want and need).
   
   With sexism against men at an all-time high, especially in the entertainment industry, you might think, when reading this book, that Dr. Laura is out of touch with reality. But nothing could be further from the truth: Her message is one of practicing the Golden Rule, and that the surest way to get over feelings of frustration or selfishness is to give of yourself.
   
   I was a little skeptical about some of the advice in the book, but I tried it and noticed in a change in my own outlook as well as in my hubby's behavior. I felt happier, too, about my role as homemaker and mother.
   
   A book like this, sadly, is least likely to be read by those who need it, but I can tell you with a very clear conscience and with compassion for couples that may be struggling that only good has come from my reading it, and hope you'll give it a chance.



3. The title may put people off, but the content of this audiobook/book is excellent and will help couples greatly. I enjoy the audiobook as I can listen in the car and I've listened twice now to the book. It's very informative and practical advice for improving lives. Highly recommended.



4. I truly enjoyed and got a lot out of Dr. Laura's Proper Care And Feeding Of Marriage, however The Proper Care And Feeding Of Husbands is a bit insulting to women. I've actually been the wife who's husband had an affair and I can honestly say, I didn't drive him to it.... What are you thinking Dr. Laura?



5. I love this book and bought it for a good friend of mine who is getting married soon. It is one of the best books that can help a woman understand her husband or men in general.

5 comments about Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience.

1. If it weren't for this book, I might not have written one of my own! Pamela D. Blair, Author The Next Fifty Years: A Guide for Women at Mid-Life And Beyond



2. Though I recently bought a 1990 edition of this book it still is quite relevant to this day. A well researched book which really makes one aware about how one can enhance the quality of one's own life. A must read for all those who are in purusit of happiness and beyond. I have been through what Mihaly describes as the state of 'FLOW' many times before. In fact at the time I was reading 'FLOW' and even at this very moment as I am writing these lines of this review I am experiencing 'FLOW' and the book apart from resonating that feeling has provided me with the awareness of ways of sustaining this state longer and has taught me how to bring this state about more often and perhaps in due course at will.



3. An very perceptive piece of work that helps you grasp what contentment and a sense of well-being means, and how you can endeavour to achieve this. I wouldn't tag it as a self-help book, rather it's an illumination of what it means to be a human being, and how it's possible to find contentment in many ways and very importantly to be at peace with yourself.



4. I stumbled upon Flow and was pleasantly surprised. The book, based on extensive research into the nature of happiness and man's most fulfilling moments, promises to provide steps towards enhancing the quality of life. With many examples and concrete suggestions, I found that it delivered to an impressive degree.
   
   From the appreciation of art and science, the deepening of friendships and romance, the establishment of a long-term life goal, and the continuous challenge of one's intellect - I found almost all of the book's suggestions to be based on sound reasoning.
   
   The single most important factor in achieving happiness in life is, according to Csikszentmihalyi, actively taking charge of one's attention and creating order in the conscious mind. Csikszentmihalyi recommends a life of continuous challenge, learning, and focus; and provides many useful guidelines for doing so successfully. The reward? Enjoying the "flow" experience often, which he describes as: "...a state of concentration so focused that it amounts to absolute absorption in an activity. People typically feel strong, alert, in effortless control, unselfconscious, and at the peak of their abilities. Both the sense of time and emotional problems seem to disappear, and there is an exhilarating sense of transcendence."
   
   While some of the above may seem self-evident, I found many principles in the book to be accurate and non-trivial. Especially in its description of the conditions for "optimal experience," including clear goals and rules that provide constant feedback, matching the levels of skill and challenge, unselfconscious absorption, and the expenditure of mental effort as a prerequisite for enjoyment. Perhaps even more useful was a review of common reasons why most people don't experience "flow," or enjoyment, very often.
   
   Despite some disagreements I have, such as with mechanistic or genetic explanations for chosen values, and an exaggerated stress on experience over fact, I found this book overall to be a well-reasoned and useful guide to improving daily experience.



5. Interesting book, explains how and why you are the way you act! Difficult to understand some times.

5 comments about Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life.

1. This book is incredible! Seligman discusses how, through our life experiences and relationships, we have become pessimistic in our thought and how to cognitively now "learn" optimism. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has only the slightest bit of negative thinking!! Thanks to the most amazing Mary H for recommending this book - you are the BEST Life Coach anyone could be blessed with!



2. When I picked up this book, I was in hopes that since it was in the Sociology section, that it would be more than a useless text that suggests for people to "think positive thoughts", regardless of whether these thoughts have substance or whether one actually believed these thoughts. Thankfully, I did not experience any disappointment with this book.
   
   Seligman takes a different angle from this by applying psychological principles that he has extensively researched in his lifetime. While some may not be interested in the psychology surrounding theories such as learned helplessness, the format of the book allows people to skip directly to the application of techniques which would allow them to use optimism AS NECESSARY as well as providing tools that would make this easier.
   
   I emphasize "as necessary" because optimism, as it is defined psychologically, is not a cure-all in the real world. I'll leave it up to the reader to figure out why not.
   
   I find this book to be a useful resource for leaders, and those with an interest in Behavioral or Positive Psychology. The book as a whole supports the "Look for heart, train for skills" mentality.



3. This is one of the most interesting books I have ever read. I'm not talking just psychology or self-improvement books...but all books...period. The science behind it, the practices outlined, the insight, will change your attitude and your life. It is unlike any book in its genre, and I can't for the life of me understand why it isn't required reading and a guide book for therapists...but I guess that would make therapy effective! :0. Not really providing a lot of information here...just read it and see for yourself. I have read all his books. This is the first and the best. If you're interested in Positive Psychology or shaking off depression/anxiety or knowing more about yourself and others...start with this book. It is not only a great read...it works. I credit it for changing my life for the better, and I no longer take medication. I would also check out the author's program of study and website and UPENN which is http://www.authentichappiness.com.



4. I thought this book gave one a great understanding to where we have been and where we could go. Here the author explained how through our experiences and relationships we are pessimistic. He reinforces that most people are negative in their thoughts and teaches us to be optimistic. I have also reviewed Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook which is a wonderful book proposing this same theory of positive thinking through The Law of Attraction. Read this to learn about the principles of The Law of Attraction and apply it through the exercises given to live this optimistic and happy life.



5. I absolutely loved this book. It helped me to start working on my world view. Although I was a very optimistic person because of a bad marriage and harsh relationship, my attitude went down. This book helped me to realize that we can make a difference in our life. I am still work in progress and we have to be patient about it but I believe world would be better place by having more optimistic people around us.

5 comments about The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want.

1. This book is well researched and written in an understandable useful style. It is something I want to keep for future reference.



2. Reading "The How of Happiness" became really an event in my life. It is written in a remarkably clear, clever and human the way. I read a lot of self-help books related to achieving a meaningful and happy life, but this one is an absolute champion. It is due to the scientific evidence behind it, witty and human writing style of the author and really practical advice and tricks on changing your habits to become happier. And achieving happiness seems so realistic after reading the book! I underlined nearly every second sentence in it, so now I can reread it comfortably to remind myself of the content. It is really worth having read and owning this book.



3. I had my misgivings when I picked up this book becuase I've read before that happiness is one of those things that becomes elusive when you try to pursue it intentionally, kind of like humor becomes unfunny when you try to analyze it. Anyway, I think I'm wrong. The author presents a number of techniques that have been verified via psychology experiments to increase your happiness levels. Some of these we've heard of before, like "count your blessings", and others may be unfamiliar. In some ways, this book is a compilation of prior psychological, self-help and religious wisdom, but backed up by scientific studies. I do believe that applying the techniques should help the reader improve their happiness levels and I'm looking forward to applying them myself.
   
   I do have some concerns, however: first, sometimes the author gives personal anecdotal evidence of how the techniques she recommends helped her in her own life. That's all well and good, but a detached, scientific advocate should not engage in this. In an odd way, this detracts from the evidence: why bolster good scientific data with your own personal stories? Second, in a few instances the author includes studies that have a very small sample or have not been run long enough. Again, why include this? Nevertheless, from my layperson's point of view, there appear to be enough solid studies to back up the claims. I highly recommend the book for anyone who is seeking to increase their everyday happiness levels.



4. I must agree with the previous reviewer who said that reading The How of Happiness will not make you happier. The How of Happiness is an emotional how-to manual. Reading it will no more make you lastingly happier than merely reading a car-repair manual will tune your engine and change your timing belt. You have to do much more than read. You have to take action.
   
   Fortunately, the book helps you identify for yourself the actions to take. Because it is grounded in evidence gathered from thousands of studies and systematically analyzed by researchers like Ms. Lyubomirsky, it can be trusted by even a diehard empiricist like me. Everyone throughout history has sought to be happy, many of them in misguided ways. But now science, in just the same way as it has uncovered the causes of good and bad physical health, has revealed many of the root sources of happiness, and, still more encouragingly, has revealed that they are greatly in your control.
   
   This book will help you plot your course and steer you clear of many of the common pitfalls on the road to happiness. In my case, though I've read many of the ideas in this book before, I would try to apply them all at once, get overwhelmed, and end up back at square one. But The How of Happiness has helped me focus my initial efforts on the two or three happiness-enhancing activities that would work best for me.
   
   Before I began applying these strategies, I was mildly depressed and every day seemed overburdened with nuisances. Where have they all gone? Since I began, on the book's recommendation, keeping a weekly gratitude journal, I find much more to appreciate in life, and have many fewer complaints.
   
   I've also chosen to work on my optimism, using the book's "Best Possible Selves" exercise. I wrote of a future ten years from now in which I had the life I dream of. I was blissed out just forming a picture of this ideal future. But the book doesn't just leave the reader there, hoping for the possible. The next step for me in the exercise is to "remember" from the vantage point of that future how I got from here to there. It provides not only hope, but also a road map, so I can *act* optimistically too, and realize the best life I can. This simple exercise makes concrete the words of Thoreau: "If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost. There is where they should be. Now put foundations under them."
   
   Inspired by The How of Happiness, I've also taken time to volunteer at a hospice service and begun sponsoring a child. Being happy, as Sonja Lyubomirsky shows in this book, both results from and results in greater generosity to others. Happiness isn't just a personal pursuit, but also a moral and spiritual one.
   
   In the religious tradition in which I was raised (Mormonism), there is a teaching about happiness by the founder Joseph Smith: "Happiness is the object and design of our existence." Whatever else in this tradition may or may not be true, this teaching cannot be wide of the mark. Spreading happiness helps to fulfill the purpose and promise of human lives, and helps people transform themselves into kinder, more generous, more productive human beings.
   
   This book is the Bible of happiness. And its work of empowering people to build happier lives is, even in my skeptical eyes, God's work.



5. I haven't even finished this and I am already happier. I consider myself to actually be pretty happy and I know enough to know that happiness is not in material things. Nonetheless, I am pretty cynical, not very forgiving and I don't have that many friends. A lot of other happiness books and articles I've read insist that if you just look on the bright side, have a big social circle, and learn to forgive other people you will be happier. According to this book that is all good advice but it is not the only way to achieve happiness. There is plenty of room for lots of different approaches to happy. This evidence based book explains them all and give you concrete and specifics steps to work on all of them. Very very worth reading!

5 comments about Stumbling on Happiness.

1. Gave it a 3 as it seems to have good ideas. Can't get through it though. Every damn sentence has a joke or parenthetical cute remark. Blech.



2. Of the many books that I have on my shelves, this one is in heavy rotation. I have read it twice in the past 18 months and referred to it countless times in between. Dan Gilbert's writing style keeps you engaged with humor and relevant stories without skimping on too much substance. Put it this way, you'll laugh but still will respect yourself when you're done!



3. Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Gilbert opens a view of happiness that is not in the normal range. Anticipation, imagination and rationalization are each responsible for much of our happiness. Mr. Gilbert disects the reasons we are happy, the times we are happy, and how we visualize our happiness. Great book - makes a person think about what they really have, want to have or don't really need.
   Prudent Pam



4. I was not very impressed.
   I had to force myself to read the second part since I lost much of interest.
   Author's inclination to try to be funny and insert lame jokes everywhere became a turn-off.
   This book is overrated.



5. The book is witty, interesting, and an overall fun read. It takes a more-or-less scientific approach towards how the brain perceives its current reality, how and of what it constructs memories, and how it attempts to construct possible futures. Throughout the book, Gilbert references scientific studies that appear to support his hypotheses.
   
   The book gave many opportunities for introspection, was easy to make relevant to my own life, and gave me some useful ideas for dealing with other people. It's less prescriptive, as other reviewers note, but it does a good job of being descriptive: why is a person happy or unhappy? Just knowing the answer to that question opens a lot of good doors when dealing with a spouse, child, parent, colleague, or friend. Know why they are sad, why they are happy, with different events.
   
   You see? It's not my fault I can't remember our first dance...I just remember that I LIKED it!
   
   I'd recommend the book. Best if you can share the anecdotes with someone!

5 comments about Happy for No Reason: 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out.

1. I found this book to be easy reading. What I particularly liked was that the author says that happiness must come from within and gives you a step-by-step approach. This theme is similar to one of my favorite books on The Law of Attraction, Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook which aims to also give you that joyful, abundant life.
   Read both and they will open up your eyes.



2. Happiness is a core state we all seek to achieve. Thanks, in part, to the Positive Psychology movement, happiness has taken center stage and is now the focus of a significant amount of attention. On a recent visit to a large, chain bookstore, I noticed one whole table devoted to books related to happiness. It appears that a happiness movement is underway.
   
   If you are just starting out on your happiness journey, or you would like additional guidance in this area, this book would be a good book for you to read. This book is both engaging and easy to read. The authors combine research findings, tools and techniques and stories to introduce the reader to the concept of happiness and more importantly, the steps you can undertake to achieve greater internally driven happiness and therefore, unconditional happiness in your life.
   
   The seven steps to being happy and the happiness habits laid out in this book are certainly a good place to start. Read this book and get started towards developing a happier you. You will be happier and so will those around you.



3. As a teacher of Laughing For No Reason I loved the practical tips and strategies in the C D set of Happy For No Reason. The information was well researched and the personal stories were relevant and inspiring and illustrated the points raised in the CD set.There were practicla exercises for each of the steps to being Happy For No Reason.The CD set mentioned PDF files which I was not able to locate or access which was disappointing as they were the worksheets for the very valuable exercises.



4. There are many viewpoints on how to achieve and live in a happy state. In Marci Shimoff's 7 steps to "Being Happy from the Inside Out", she focuses on making adjustments to our "happiness set-point" to achieve a state of being happy on the inside. She discourages us from having our happiness directed by external experiences such as personal achievement, reaching goals, obtaining money, etc. She believes that lasting happiness must be independent of what is happening in one's life.
   
   The book presents researched, practical information with the 7 steps to follow, illustrations, exercises, important points to remember, and the stories of 100 people. The author reports that scientists have identified that we each possess our own happiness set-point, which is described as our genetic and learned tendency to be at a certain level of happiness. Just like any "set-point" theory, the good news is that it is possible to adjust our individual happiness set-points. The book provides specific exercises that can be employed to raise our happiness set-points. The book's stories from happy people describe how they learned be grateful, happy people. These inspiring stories show people overcoming difficult and would-be devastating circumstances. Are you unhappy, happy for a good reason, happy for a bad reason, or in a neurophysiological state of happiness that is independent of your circumstances? The author advocates the latter. She also says happiness is a choice, which I agree with. Author of THE 3:00 PM SECRET: Live Slim and Strong, Live Your Dreams



5. It makes me unhappy to read a book this lengthy about how to be happy:-)...but the exhaustive detail of the book's contents is impressive...WOW! Was anything left out? I think not! Perhaps the book's message can be summed up in the words of a colleague, who reminded me again just yesterday..."Let's remember the good news: Anything that ever bothers you is in your mind; and anything that is good for you is in your mind. Being happy is all about reframing...CONTINUALLY." For those who want/need/like more, Shimoff's book gives the reader a truckload of excellent tools to get the reframing job done over and over and over...and over. She has generously included something here for all shapes and sizes of minds.

5 comments about The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom, A Toltec Wisdom Book.

1. Put down the other books, cancel your life coach session and buy this book. This is pretty much the basics of what you need to know about the rules of the road so to speak. Granted it's simple--but that's the beauty of it.
   The Four Agreements are:
   Be Impeccable With Your Word
   Don't Take Anything Personally
   Don't Make Assumptions
   Always Do Your Best
   Have you ever wished life came with some sort of instruction book? Well it doesn't but this is as close as anything I've seen. This is brilliant flashing insight.



2. For anyone who beats themselves up, for what others think or say about them, who question the past, present and future of their lives, this book is a way to keep it all sane. Seems it worked for Alex of the Yankees and it you want it will work for you too!



3. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is a very practical and eye-opening book. It teaches that by adopting the following four agreements: (1) Be Impeccable With Your Word, (2) Don't Take Anything Personally, (3) Don't Make Assumptions, and (4) Always Do Your Best, an ordinary life can be transformed into a magical one, filled with happiness, integrity and love. I was particularly inspired by the fourth agreement - "Always Do Your Best." Adopting that agreement supported me in being proactive in each moment of my life, regardless of the task at hand and regardless of the outcome. I felt alive and passionate even while doing activities I once thought were boring or mundane.
   
   Another practical and inspiring approach to transformation can be found in the work of Ariel and Shya Kane. Their books: Working on Yourself Doesn't Work: A Book About Instantaneous Transformation; How To Create a Magical Relationship; and Being Here: Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment, demonstrate how being present in your life, exactly as it is showing up, leads to satisfaction and well being. The touching stories shared by the Kanes are supportive of living a magical life, regardless of the circumstances, and without having to work on yourself. I highly recommend the Kanes' books and The Four Agreements for a simple and practical approach to transforming your life.



4. I've been reading through some of the reviews of this book, positive and negative. Of course there are lots of books out there about the same thing. Of course we've heard all this before. But personally, this book actually broke through and made sense to me. Like in those old cartoons where a light bulb turns on over your head. I read this book and it all made sense; I saw what I was doing, I looked at myself honestly and made real changes. I don't know what makes this book different from the others that tell you basically the same thing. I think, though, that it is its simplicity. Don't give people power over you. Not a lot of psychological studies, case histories and boring details. Just simple and honest advice. Take back the power. When people hurt you, you allow them to. You agree to it. Maybe this doesn't make sense to everyone. But this book changed my entire life view and I believe that it will do the same for anyone who reads it with an open mind and an honest vision of themselves.



5. The concepts of this book are right on the money. There were a few statements that I didn't quite agree with and at times it gets a little wordy, but it is a quick read. This book is an absolute "must read" for folks who tend to have a little too much drama in their lives and seem to be unable break away from it. If you live with, are related to, work with or manage people who fit this description, recommend this book -- better yet, buy it for them.

5 comments about Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life.

1. The materials in this book are helping me sort out the relationship problems affecting my life, particularly with my teenage son.



2. A book everybody should read. This is one the best books I have ever read, this kind of education should be given in elementary school and distribute copies for free for grown-ups. Thanks many.



3. Everyone should read this book. Whether you grew up in a stable loving home or in the exact opposite we all need help in setting and keeping boundaries. I was skeptical when my pastor first recommended this book. I thought it was going to be just another self help book that I would read and never really use. I was very wrong. Boundaries has helped me to not take on more than God wants me to, in life in general but most importantly in my church. It is so easy to feel obligated to fill needs when they arise but when we fill needs that aren't ours to fill we are hurting ourselves and those people God really intended to fill them.
   
   I have also learned to identify boundary and character problems in others. I can't tell you how much trouble that will keep me out of in the future. Most importantly I have learned how to teach my children proper boundaries so they can avoid some of the mistakes I and so many others have made simply because we didn't know what good boundaries were.



4. Excellent ! Boundaries were totally lacking in my life. This is a Christian book that clarifies how to be a Christian and have strong boundaries instead of confusion and chaos. Too many Christian ministers preach against boundaries knowingly or unknowingly and boundaries are NOT unbiblical--this book saved my life from depression and ruin. I now understand how my destructive patterns in relationships got me in my messes and now I know how to prevent the messes. I am happy, emotionally healthy, and those around me are no longer guessing. They know who I am and can trust me. When I say something, I mean what I say. No more games. BOUNDARIES set me free. I was raised in my family of origin without any healthy boundaries, but it is NEVER too late in life to develop healthy boundaries. I was yearning and so hungry for this information. THANKS BE TO GOD THAT THESE AUTHORS PROVIDED BOUNDARIES.



5. I have enjoyed this book tremendously. I really don't have to feel guilty by saying no. We all have limits, and especially in the Christian community, we have to be careful. Some would call us selfish and other names, if we have to say no to money, time, etc. requests. I really needed this book at a critical time in my life! I'm fed up with others thinking that my husband and I are at their beck and call. We cannot save the world from all the problems of others!!! This book goes into reaping and sowing. To learn and grow, we MUST reap and sow. We all MUST be responsible for our own knapsacks-daily cares. Read the book and you will know the difference between something catastrophic and other's daily woes and cares. We can't handle everything that is sometimes thrown at us. THANK YOU for this book!

5 comments about Law of Attraction: The Science of Attracting More of What You Want and Less of What You Don't.

1. This is a very good introductory book with some good information...but a bit theoretical and too brief. For those of you who want to really embrace the principles of The Secret (Aka The law of Attraction)into your life, I would recommend the very practical Living The Secret Everyday: My Secret Workbook- it explains, gives tips, strategies,and exercises to keep you focused on that life you want...truly life-changing for me !



2. The authors and/or publishers of this book didn't even bother to change the title from its original authors, Jerry & Esther Hicks. I don't understand how someone spouting spiritual teachings could be okay with stealing material. They would do well to also study the law of Karma, for even if they don't it will find them.



3. I'm a bit confused about the low rated reviewers stating that this book is not for you if you've read about the "Law of Attraction" elsewhere. They are usually referring to "The Secret" or "Ask and it is Given".
   
   Well I'm going to say that if you HAVE read about the "Law of Attraction" then this book IS for you. Why? because I read the Secret and watched the movie. They are both excellent and inspirational but they are also a bit abstract.
   
   I mean I understood and took to heart the message of the "The Secret" and tried to implement it in a practical everyday sense, but its difficult because you will fall into traps and pitfalls that aren't addressed by "the Secret" such as wording affirmations that are believable to you and don't leave you with doubts because of the little voice in your head contradicting your desires. For exmple you look in the mirror and say you're slim and fit but you're not now, so that little voice reminds you of that fact which then sends out negative emotions while you dwell on not being slim and fit, which in turn brings more of the same.
   
   According to Losier and "the Secret" the faster you remove doubts that you will recieve what you've asked for, the faster your desires will manifest. But where where in the Secret book is it simply explained how to remove your doubts? This is where Losier takes over.
   
   Losier isn't trying to write a treatise on the Law of Attraction, he is simply giving you a simple easy to implement plan to take the fullest advantage of this principal.
   
   So if you are familiar with the Law of Attraction then this book is for you if you need simple tools to apply the laws of attraction. If you haven't read about the Law of Attraction then get either the Secret or "Ask and it is given" before you get this book.



4. "The Law of Attraction" by Michael J. Losier offers a methodology, or system, for attaining a productive, healthy lifestyle. The author examines a concept he calls `vibrations'. He feels that we send out both positive and negative vibrations as we go about our daily routines, and the quality of our lives is directly related to those vibrations.
   
   He also spends time discussing his ideas about `contrasting'. Losier feels that if you spend time observing and identifying the things in life that you don't want, then you will become clearer about the things that you do want in your life. The author explains that `contrasting' allows you to find clarity about the things that you want to attract into your life. Prevalent throughout the book are examples of how people are able to use a contrast/clarity chart to identify simple and attainable goals. For instance, one of Losier's clients identifies the contrast (things she didn't like) about a former boyfriend. Her list includes such things as "controlling", "poor listener", and "not affectionate". She is then able to compare these behaviors on her clarity side (things she likes) by listing "flexible, well balanced", "great listening skills", "affectionate, sensitive". Losier suggests that when you look closely at what you don't want to attract within your life, you can then become clearer about what you do want.
   
   Two of my favorite authors, Ariel and Shya Kane, address similar ideas about how to have a magical and successful approach to life. While Losier discusses his theories, which center around `vibrations' and their resulting consequences, the Kanes encourage the reader to simply become more aware of their thoughts, without assigning a judgment to them. In each one of their books- "Being Here: Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment", "Working on Yourself Doesn't Work: A Book About Instantaneous Transformation" and "How To Create a Magical Relationship"- the Kanes discuss the possibilities of transforming your life by simply being in the moment, fully and completely. The authors suggest that your life can transform by getting into each moment of now- not by thinking about it or by analyzing it- but just by being here. The best part of the Kanes' approach is that it sounds easy- and it is! After reading these insightful, thought-provoking books I find it much more fun to actually live my life than to sit around and think about living my life!
   
   All three authors offer important and relevant insights and I think their philosophies compliment one another. Why not read all four books and see for yourself?!



5. This book is "hands on" training and actually teaches us how to apply the law of attraction in our lives. I recommend it to anyone who has studied and tried to use the law of attraction without much prior success. An excellent read, it works well when used in concert with "The Secret" and/or "The New Earth," as well as others. I can't say enough good things about this book. You simply have to read it and apply its methods to see real and positive changes occur in your lives. Happy reading!

5 comments about Steering by Starlight: Find Your Right Life, No Matter What!.

1. 
   I love Martha Beck, and I'm enjoying the warm afterglow from this book.
   
   For Olympic swimming fans - life is like a swim, and Martha is the possibly illegal new swimsuit that helps you glide through the pool like never before!
   
   It's too soon to talk about life changes, but stay tuned!
   
   Eric Winter



2. That's How the Light Gets In: Memoir of a Psychiatrist by Susan Rako, M.D. The title comes from a song by Leonard Cohen: "There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." Rako's book is very insightful, inspirational, and a pleasure to read -- wonderfully well-written. The writing simply flows.



3. Martha Beck is an inspiring life coach. I love her books. They tend to move me forward in life and give my hope.



4. I just love Martha Beck's writing style. She takes high-level concepts and makes them easy to understand. I've tried reading another very popular book with a similar message (you can probably guess which one), but I just couldn't get it. What Beck does best is offer real-life examples along with easy-to-understand metaphors for these concepts. This book came into my life at a time when I was dealing with a pretty dark depression, and I have to say that they exercises have helped me keep my focus on the life I want instead of re-playing the never-ending loop of negativity. If you're not ready to dig deep and take a good hard look at yourself, you won't like this book. We've gotten out of trusting ourselves and our intuition due to so many voices out there telling us what we should be. Ms. Beck helps you get in touch with who you are at your very core. She is very upfront that the work it takes to get there is often painful. But the end result is worth the work.



5. Steering by Starlight: Find Your Right Life, No Matter What! by Martha Beck is an empowering,wonderful book. Beck is a Harvard educated life coach.
   
   She writes: "My goal in writing this book is to help you find your deepest sense of purpose--to give you back to yourself, since you are the ultimate arbiter of your own fate."
   
   Throughout the book, there are lots of stories about her clients that illuminate her theories. Many might seem fantastic and over-the-top to the uninitiated, but as someone who has experience with many of Beck's work, I can assure you they are real.
   
   Beck writes about our three selves--essential, social and stargazer. The stargazer is the higher or true self; it is the self imbibed with the knowledge of true destiny and purpose in life.
   
   The book is filled with exercises to uncover our destiny and purpose. She discusses three stages:
   
   *Dissolving: when you remove the blinders that prevent us from seeing our destiny
   * Dreaming: When we begin to align ourselves with our fate, we will experience magic, coincidences and more
   * Daring: Learning the work to make our destiny happen
   
   Beck mentions The Secret and how the essential message is "everything you think about happens." She struggled with that and came up with this: "thoughts that come from the core of peace are magic, versus thoughts from our shallow outer limits of our psyches have little power." I love that!
   
   She writes: "Living space is a powerful metaphor for your life. Whether you know it or not, you can't change your life without changing your home, and vice versa." I loved this, as it was a bit of coincidence/magic for me--I recently read Harmonious Environment: Beautify, Detoxify and Energize Your Life, Your Home and Your Planet and the book has allowed me to change my house/change my life!
   
   This is a clear and concise guide to learning how to access your higher self, live proactively and reach your goals.