4 comments about GenderSpeak: Personal Effectiveness in Gender Communication.

1. This textbook is now available in second edition, as of the fall of 1999. The second edition is significantly updated, with more references to the impact of technology on communication between the sexes and more attention paid to issues surrounding diversity. A new, highly provocative chapter has been included on power abuses in human relationships. Three main topics--sexual harassment, sexual assault and dating rape, and partner violence--are the focus of this chapter.



2. This book is a great resource for any college student studying communication. One of the co-authors of this book is an instructor at the school I attend. The book really gets into the gender differences in communication just as the instructor does in class. I highly recommend it for anyone interested in the topic.



3. I am a university professor of linguistics. If I were teaching a course in this field, this is the textbook I would use. It truly introduces the range of topics in the field in a manageable, engaging way. Excellent.



4. I tried e-mailing the seller several times to either cancel the order or information on returning the book when it arrived. I realized it was the wrong book (which was my fault), but it could've been resolved had the seller returned my e-mails. So I'm stuck with a book I can't use.

5 comments about The 7 Essential Steps to Successful eBay Marketing.

1. I have been selling on Ebay for over 2 years. But after reading this book I realize how little I knew about marketing my product. This little gem contains very valuable information about making the most out of Ebay's competitive marketplace. This book is interesting to read and gives clear step by step instructions for changes you can make to Market your Ebay items. Like I said, I thought I knew a lot about Ebay but I was surprised by how much I learned from this book!



2. This book is hardcore. Give a lot of info and can save painfull hours of try-and-faild. You need to read it.



3. I've been selling on ebay since July 2005. Part time. I've read 8 books on ebay. This is one of the Best. I have not had time to use the info in it. But have tried to impliment some of the tips. It is full of great ideas and sources of the kind of information one needs to be successful on ebay. I highly recommed it.



4. A Gotta Have book if you are planning on Marketing an eBay business. Great reference for the experienced eBayer.



5. I am new as an ebay seller and I plan to open a store soon I hope. I bought this book in order to get good, helpful tips and advices. I got them! This book goes in depth in every aspect. Very detailed oriented and this is what I wanted. Definitely a great buy and a must have.

4 comments about The Self Matters Companion : Helping You Create Your Life from the Inside Out.

1. I can honestly say that this book changed my life. I followed the exercises and within 4 months, I had tripled my authenticity score. This book, and it's journal companion, helped me set goals and achieve them. "Waiting for You: An Heirloom Adoption Journal for My Future Child" is now my dream come true. THANK YOU DR. PHIL! :)



2. The book of the same title is relatively good, but the companion workbook is a waste of money! It requires you to have the original book to work along with it.
   Get the REAL book which also includes the exact SAME exercises that are featured in the companion, with the exception being the companion includes loads of empty space for you to be write in.
   So, get the REAL book and get a cheap journal to write in those exercises (instead of this costly, redundant workbook), and leave this companion on the shelf.



3. As the title plainly states, this is a COMPANION book and is NOT meant to be used as a replacement for the Self Matters book. This helps greatly with organizing the written exercises in the book itself. While, yes, you can just as easily purchase an empty journal, I enjoy the ordered format of this workbook. It kept me more inclined to do the exercises as they are asked of you, rather than reading the whole book first as I had done the first time, I just skipped over the exercises altogether. If you're not as disciplined, having this workbook encourages you to work out and actually DO the written work, which is a vital step in reaping the benefits of Self Matters. I highly recommend it.



4. This book arrived in about 5 days and in excellent condition. I was a bit leary because of the low price, but it all worked out fine.
   
   Thank you.

No comments about In Search of Leadership: How Great Leaders Answer the Question "Why Lead?".

2 comments about The Family First Workbook: Specific Tools, Strategies, and Skills for Creating a Phenomenal Family.

1. This is a good book, a lot of good information is given and worth purchasing. The only exception, is that doesn't really speak to blended families so well or how a step-parent should deal with the trials which are faced and gone through especially when older children are involved.



2. I found this book to be a very helpful companion to the book, Family First. It compliments the book quite well.

5 comments about Powerful Conversations: How High Impact Leaders Communicate.

1. When you talk, do people listen? Communicating effectively is essential in the business world. It is the first step in the path toward leadership. While other business books discuss leadership as a whole, this one focuses in on one of the most basic - and often overlooked - prerequisites to leadership: excellent communication skills. While most of the suggestions presented in Powerful Conversations seem like simple common sense, the book does get you to focus on critical points that you probably take for granted, like building trust, preparing in advance for potentially touchy conversations and actually listening to what other people say. In addition, it offers some helpful conversational strategies and pointers for determining when your meeting is heading south. We [...] recommend this book to executives in leadership positions, who will be reminded to brush up on their conversational style and delivery, and to business people and students looking to talk their way to the top.



2. The title Powerful Conversations: How High-Impact Leaders Communicate led me to believe that this book was primarily concerned with interpersonal communication. I found, however, that it is largely focussed on the ethics of leadership and the philosophy of emotional intelligence as applied to big business. The book is of high calibre in this respect, and for this reason I gave it 4 stars. But if you are looking for a hands-on manual on communication you will need to look elsewhere.
   
   Anyone who is sufficiently motivated to read this book will no doubt be already aligned with the basic philosophy of trust, openness, honesty, and clarity. The challenge lies in implementing such a philosophy. No doubt Harkins takes a more practical approach in his corporate training programme, and it would be a very large and expensive book if it were to contain such a programme in full. However, I find it frustrating that Harkins spends far more time explaining why than he does explaining how. Some methodology is woven into the text, but on the whole, the presentation focuses largely on principles and attitudes.
   
   All of these elements, of course, provide a necessary foundation for any system; after all, rote behaviours are largely unsustainable. But there is also a need for clear directives on the progressive action steps that need to be taken. The book must serve exceedingly well as a door opener for corporate clients, but the owner/operator of a small business will not find definitive steps that he or she could progressively implement from the book alone. I should add that I am not advocating the rigid paint-by-numbers formula that some other motivational books follow.
   
   What I most question is Harkins' representation of trust as a primary focus, rather than as an outcome of deliberate and conscious process. Trust, far from being a subjective quality only, is an objective competency that employees as well as their leaders must progressively develop and demonstrate. For example, in his book, Leadership, Rudolph Giuliani describes the functioning of his mayoral team with great frankness. In so doing, he demonstrates clearly how trust is not assumed at the beginning; it is developed over time and established through frank and honest appraisal of each team member's verbal and practical input. I miss this in Harkins' book.
   
   I have nevertheless reserved a place for Powerful Conversations on my bookshelves. But to round out Harkins' perspective, I have added books like Rudolph Giuliani's Leadership, Jim Loehr's & Tony Swartz's The Power of Full Engagement, Dorothy Leeds' The 7 Powers of Questions and Meryl Runion's Power Phrases. Together, they make a mighty team.



3. Prior to reading Powerful Conversations: How High-Impact Leaders Communicate, I had anticipated a manual to the proper rules of conversation. However, this book turned out to be much more than a manual of sorts. Harkins not only provides ways to develop excellent communication as well as leadership skills, he also explains what powerful conversations are, how they are structured, and what types of impacts, accomplishments and outcomes they render.
   Being able to communicated effectively is critical in today's corporate world. Harkins reminds us of some of the most basic skills that most of us don't even consider to be as important in communication as they actually prove to be. Skills such as the ability to build trusting relationships and listen carefully to others.
   However, not all the techniques discussed are as basic. It does indeed take practice to become a master of powerful conversation. Harkins provides six tools which can be used to enhance your communication and leadership skill in order to ensure greater success. I found Tool 1: Planning, Conducting, and Measuring Powerful Conversations, to be an excellent guideline for the preparation and implementation of powerful conversations. This tool also provides a series of simple but very relevant questions that you can ask yourself to determine what type of outcome resulted from your conversation.
   Harkins also includes a self-scoring sample of the Leadership Assessment Instrument (LAI) to help you gain insight into your own leadership abilities, which I found to be extremely helpful.
   Overall, I found this book to be very beneficial and would recommend it to professionals, students, and anyone looking to enhance their success.



4. It is no secret that some leaders can inspire people to heroic levels of greatness, while others can not even stimulate individuals to the level of mediocrity. Some organizations can inspire fierce employee loyalty while others watch their top talent depart regularly. The author of this book argues that often the reason for these situations lies in the way the top leaders of an organization communicate with the rest of the organization.
   
   The author of this book shares his insight as to how high impact leaders communicate. By sharing the stories of some remarkable leaders who use Powerful Conversations techniques to spread their voice throughout their organization, to instill trust and loyalty, and to effectuate deep and profound change when change is necessary, the author hopes to share:
   
   · why you must always say what you will do and what you say;
   · how to use the four-step Tower of Power to guide companies through Powerful Conversations that lead to action;
   · how to really listen to people so that organizations hear their message and they know that you understand;
   · how to create Agenda for change and implement it to create profound change within the organization.
   
   The author shares the five competencies-focused drive, emotional intelligence, trusted influence, conceptual thinking and systems thinking-shared by all high-impact leaders.



5. As a coach, consultant and author (Strategic Interviewing: Skills and Tactics for Savvy Executives I have read many books about communication. I have to admit this one goes right to the top. It provides an excellent model for powerful conversations that are based on open communication, trust, and forward movement. The model of "What's Up, What's So, What's Possible, Let's Go, is simple and complex at the same time. Harkins shares real-life examples that illustrate his points. Combining this resource with another of my favorites, Difficult Conversations Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss what Matters Most will enable any leader to maximize his or her communication results. Pay special attention to the definition of "passionate champions" and the enlistment of these people for supporting organizational change.
   
   This is definitely a must-read for high impact leaders.

5 comments about The ADD Answer: How to Help Your Child Now--With Questionnaires and Family-Centered Action Plans to Meet Your Child's Specific Needs.

1. There are many great ideas presented in this book about dealing with your add child, BUT the chapter on meds is completely off base. Let me preface the following with MY opinion (I am not an MD or an expert) that children with ADD need a team approach in helping them deal with the condition (if you choose to call it one) and there is a place for meds for many kids, BUT it is only a piece of the puzzle. Parents, teachers, family members, Md's, and behavioral specialists are all crucial. I happen to work indirectly with many of the world thought leaders and experts on ADD (ie. Joseph Beiderman, Mass General Hospital, Boston MA/ Harvard Medical School, ... look up his credentials). First Dr. Frank Lawlis is not an MD, this means he has not been to medical school- that is not to say he isn't a great psychologist, just that he HAS NOT and DOES NOT write prescriptions for these meds and has NO first hand experience with directly managing these meds himself. In this book there are many things that are completely false regarding ADD meds. For example he states that they only work for about 50% of kids. FALSE Let me cite 3 credible sources that disputes this (notice in the book that he does not talk about HIS credible source)
   1. "approx 70% of patients respond to the first stimulant agent administered with resulting improvement in their ADHD symptoms." - Practical Considerations in Stimulant Drug Selection for the ADHD Patient- Efficacy, Potency and Titration Beiderman, Today's Therapeutic Trends, 02'
   2. "Improvement occurred in 65-75% of 5,899 patients randomized to stimulants." - Practice Parameter for the Use of Stimulant Medication in the Treatment of Children, Adolescents, and Adults, Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry Feb02'
   3. "At least 80% of children will respond to one of the stimulants if they are tried in a systemic way." Clinical Practice Guideline: Treatment of the School-Aged Child with ADHD, Published in American Acedemy of Pediatrics, Oct 01'.
   
   All of these quotes are credible and are opinions based on evidence-based medicine from the experts. Lawlis also states that there has been little research in children and that most studies have been done on adults and rats/mice. This is Completely False! The Journal noted above, Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry (that was a review of "161 randomized controlled trials that have been published encompassing 5 preschool, 150 school-age, 7 Adolescent, and 9 adult studies" Where does Dr. Lawlis get his information?
   The review noted above by the American Acedemy of Pediatrics, identified for analysis 2405 citations, 92 reports, and 78 different studies. This is American Acedemy of Pediatrics- They are only interested in children and adolescents! Not Rats, Mice, and Adults.
   These are the most credible Medical Journals published. These are not the biased trials sponsored by big pharma. The information in these Journals is taken very seriously by Pediatricians and Child Psychiatrists, and is heavily relied upon by these professionals.
   
   Lastly, he also states that these drugs are identical to cocaine in their affect on the brain. This is not true, they have similarities, but by NO-Means identical. Yes it is true that stimulant medications can be abused and can also be addictive, but some of the newer formulations of these meds have lessened their abuse and addictive potential by altering the speed at which the drug is released into the bloodstream thereby somewhat flattening the curve (Cocaine use produces a curve that is almost straight up-this is what gives the "high") The most common way for these drugs to be abused is by crushing them and snorting them (which allows for fast absorption and steep curve), and some of the newer meds are crush resistant and/or cannot be turned into a fine enough substance to be snorted. There has also been data published that shows a DECREASE not increase in drug abuse for patients who have taken stimulants. It is believed that kids who are treated (drug treatment and otherwise) are less likely to associate with kids who are failing academically/socially and who are more likely to be using drugs. (This is not to say that high all high achievers abstain from using OR that ALL children who are failing ARE using) It is just a point that kids who are treated are more likely to be focused on school and their responsibilities and are less likely to be involved in drug use. Kids who are failing in school academically/socially are often looked at as outcasts and are often looked down upon by peers, teachers, and family, and this can cause a child to look for an escape... sometimes drugs. Children who Do benefit from stimulant medication sometimes have more self-esteem because of their success, and certainly less scrutiny from peers, teachers etc.
   
   Lastly, Lawlis tells a story about a man who died from long-term stimulant medication. I am not going to say that this did not happen, but I will say that stimulants have been used since the 1950's, and the medical community agrees that they are safe when managed properly. The medical community and FDA have pulled MANY medications that were deemed unsafe from the markets (many times against the will of BIG Pharma) and the stimulants would not have remained on the market for OVER 50 YEARS, if stories like this were common or the least bit likely.
   
   I am not at all stating that stimulant meds are the answer because they are not, but they can be a small piece of the puzzle that is helping these kids with ADD. The book is full of great ideas and approaches to ADD, but he is not accurate about the stimulant medications. Parents who see value in them should not feel ashamed and or frightened by what he says because most of it is just not accurate. Good luck and I hope this was helpful.



2. Concerned Mom,
   
   Before 86-ing this book, look at your own source, which is 5 years old. Also consider that the vast majority of the psychiatric profession in Europe believes ADD is a figment of the American psychiatric community's imagination. If they're right, anyone who believes ADD is a genuine disorder is a pseudoscientist, whether they believe it can be conclusively diagnosed or not.
   
   In addressing ADD and ADHD Dr. Phil and Frank have both maintained that a thorough attempt at a differential diagnosis MUST be made(ruling out other learning disorders, stressors in the home, other possible disorders or chemical imbalances, depression, etc.) PRIOR to reaching a diagnosis of ADD/ADHD. They also insist that this must be done in CONJUNCTION with an EEG. The EEG reading alone is persuasive, but not diagnostic. If they have claimed to the contrary then they are going against everything they have maintained in their shows addressing this issue.
   
   You may agree or disagree with them and I'm sure some qualified professionals disagree with them as well. That's not uncommon in the medical community, and it certainly doesn't make this pseudo science.
   
   If their claim were simply that the EEG ALONE were diagnostic in the absence of a thorough examination of patient history, etc., then you're beef would be legitimate. But why the hostility? These days children are often overmedicated based solely on the reommendation of tired parents or teachers. By contrast Dr. Phil is advocating a careful thorough screening prior to reaching that diagnosis, and consideration of all available therapies, not medical therapy alone. At the same time the screening process he's advocating will no doubt help some people who haven't been diagnosed but should have been finally get the help they need. So many are written of an depressed or looking for excuses for a lifelong struggle with frustration and attention span (my wife for example), but thanks to a rigorous screening process followed by a careful neurological exam including an EEG, most of the red herrings can finally be ruled out and effective treatment can begin. This is a total middle of the road position between throwing pills out willy nilly and just telling people to get over their disorder. Who loses here? And where is the argument that the EEG IN CONJUNCTION WITH a careful differential diagnosis, detailed patient history and examination of past behavior, academic struggles, etc., can't be diagnostic of this disorder? Some may disagree, but what's new about that?
   
   The three star rating is because I haven't finished reading the book.



3. I am an adult with ADHD inatintive type. I have struggled all my life with this condition. Howevere, I have managed to earn a BA in psychology and I am currently working on a masters degree. Because of my expierences in psychology classes I know something about scientific research and empirical evidence. This book was a major dissapointment to me because it lacks the simple scholary research to prove the claims made by Dr Lawless. I am afraid this book is nothing more then modernday snake-oil that will cause more harm then good.
   
   This book is so full of pseudo-science that I fear it may cause a great deal of harm to children and adults with ADHD. Dr. Lawless is a psychologist and should now how to read the scientifice research on the subject found in peer reviewed journals. While, I believe that the chemeicals in the foods we eat are a major cause of illnesses, ADHD and obesity, There is little scientific evidence that add is caused by diet. However, their maybe more evidence in the future. One of his clames of red dye has been proven completly false. Another one his claims about magnet theropy are so out of the scientific mainstream that he comes of as a snakeoils salesman. Please do not buy this book. If you want reliable information by on of the Driven to Distraction books.



4. I found this book to be an excellent resource for a parent lost in the sea of ADD/ADHD information. The author's conservative approach is sensible and educated. I also appreciate the subtle spiritual insight he offers which helps the reader understand some very positive aspects of ADD. This book has become my main resource while we deal with this situation.



5. Read this book in 2 days. Fascinating. Answered all my questions
   and gave lots of suggestions for parents dealing with an ADD child.

5 comments about Life Strategies: Doing What Works, Doing What Matters.

1. This book was bought for my neice. I already had it and believe me, after you read the first two chapters you know this book isn't just a lot of mumbo jumbo. Instead of giving you reasons why your life is messed up it actually helps you evaluate your life where it is at right now. You'll gain insight about your behaviors and how they affect your decisions. You'll understand how you invite people to treat you the way they do. It's not all roses but it's great information if you really want to make a change in how your life is going. There are so many "well, duh..that makes total sense!" moments in this book! It's a great read. I also have the workbook (which really is a WORK book).



2. Despite being embarrassed to buy this book (I felt like a loser handing it to the cashier), I bought it anyway because I like Dr. Phil's show--he's entertaining. However, I didn't find this book nearly as helpful as Wayne Dyer, The Secret or Eckart Tolle. I didn't take anything away from it, and I wish I had bought something else instead of this book. Sorry Dr. Phil! I still love your show and that brilliant masterpiece, Dr. Phil House.



3. Haven't gotten a chance to read it yet. I glanced through it and it seems helpful in preparing my personal vision statement.



4. "Life Strategies" is a quick, very basic reminder of sound - just as the title states - life strategies. Nothing profound here. Nothing earth shattering. Nothing you probably haven't heard in most contemporary self-help books, in fact. Or from your favorite neighborhood therapist, I imagine. The book may be a good addition to your bookshelf if that is what you seek - something of a reference book, or checklist, to turn to now and then to jog your memory about how to stay on track toward achieving your personal measure of success in life, or just to give yourself a pep talk.
   
   Dr. Phil uses almost annoyingly simple (but precise) language, so I would think it would be difficult to misunderstand anything in these pages unless one is bound and determined to remain deluded and avoid life in general. No doubt, there are many such. Last I heard, the "happiness quotient" in modern society has been slipping, so I won't argue that point, just put it out there ... some people truly are more comfortable being unhappy and avoiding life. But, supposing you are one of those who really would like to stay focused and have a desire to fulfill your potential, this is a nice little starter kit. Basic and on target.
   
   The main message of these life strategies is that a person should take full and conscious ownership of one's own life. The rest is detail. Dr. P. reminds you that no matter what the circumstances, it really is what you make of it and in what direction you decide to take your next step. Sure, that may be much easier for some than many others, depending on your circumstances. But hard or easy is not the issue. Hard or easy, it is still your life, your circumstances, and your choice, and yours alone - where you take it from here.
   
   No stroke of brilliance to hold us all accountable or that nailing down a goal firmly only helps strengthen our resolve to achieve it. The more detailed the battle plan, the better. Just common sense. Those who achieve most in life (and I agree with Dr. P, there is no such thing as luck) are those who keep a persistently positive attitude, have a clear goal in mind, are willing to work hard at it, are willing to take a risk now and then to pull away from the ordinary masses to become extraordinary. I'm not sure the final section that glorified his wife, Robin, was necessary (too saccharin for my taste), nor, perhaps, the stories about Oprah and Andy the cab driver. But the book achieves what no doubt was Dr. P's life strategy: outline the usual behaviors and attitudes that work. We all can use the occasional pep talk and reminder.



5. i've been reading this book and really thinking about the suggested advice and i think it's valuable. dr. phil tells it like it is. the life laws and strategies are worth considering. i do believe if put into practice his advice can help with any sitauation in your life that you're not happy about. as with any advice you get, take what is useful/valuable and discard the rest.
   
   this book has one of the best and most useful explanations on the importance of forgiveness that i've ever read. dr. phil really explains it so that you understand how not forgiving someone really hurts you, not the other person. some writers almost encourage you to embrace and pray for the other person and that was just too much for me. this book tells you how to release yourself from that person and not let them change you at your core by forgiving them and letting go, whether they ask for or want forgiveness at all. for me this explanation makes the book worth it.
   
   some people might find his approach too direct but i like that. i'm going through a self-development phase so this was valuable to me. there's a good amount of life stories integrated in with solid advice. the book does start out with a story about oprah and the amarillo/cattlemen issue which was relevant at the time but is a bit outdated now but that doesn't take away from the content and advice in the book.

2 comments about The Self Matters Companion: Helping You Create Your Life from the Inside Out.

1. This workbook is especially useful to use alongside Self Matters. I find it helpful in my work with clients and they enjoy discussing the insights they get from it. Pamela D. Blair, Author The Next Fifty Years: A Guide for Women at Mid-Life And Beyond



2. Dr. Phil illustrates complex comcepts in understandable terms. This book helped me see myself through the mirror of my past.

5 comments about Love Smart: Find the One You Want--Fix the One You Got.

1. Since I'm not interested in dating and my husband doesn't want to be fixed, I had to ask myself why I was reading a book about single women looking for Mr. Right. I guess I am curious and I wanted to know what Dr. Phil's "Fix the One You Got" entailed. To be frank, this is not a book for married couples who are seeking a more harmonious relationship. This is strictly a book for women who want to find Mr. Right.
   
   Dr. Phil spends a great deal of time explaining why you are worthy and what you should do to capture a man's attention. What are men really thinking during the dating game and how can you become the woman they can't stop thinking about? This book begins with some pretty amusing letters about dating and then takes an especially honest look at self-esteem issues.
   
   The chapters on how men think are very revealing. You can even amuse yourself by writing down all the qualities you'd like in a dream man. I was amazed at how many qualities my husband actually had once I wrote out my list.
   
   Overall, Dr. Phil gives some sage advice to women who want to play the dating game with a sense of purpose. There are "icebreaker questions" to use in any situation and lots of hints and tips for being a winner in the game of love.
   
   So despite the title of this book it is mostly for single women who are trying to understand male behavior. If you are already married then this may not be the book you are looking for and you may want to buy All You Need Is Love and Other Lies About Marriage: A Proven Strategy to Make Your Marriage Work, from a Leading Couples Therapist.
   
   ~The Rebecca Review



2. Say what you will about Dr.Phil, but he does know his stuff. Also, he's got a great prespective on dating and in this book, it shows. I learned a lot and was happy to read this book, which has helped me in numerous ways. I also liked and would suggest another dating book which, along with "Love Smart" has also helped me: Dating Sense: The Practical Way to Meet, Date and Marry the Right Person .



3. This is ludicrous. Dr. Phil was married before but they divorced - he didn't fix her. (as if there were such a thing)
   
   His popularity has gone to his head. I still watch the show if the topic is interesting but WHY does he think we all love Robin? I avoid the shows with her completely. I was married to an Army Officer for over 30 years but it didn't make me qualified to lead troops into battle. He thinks we want her opinion on everything. I don't!
   
   You cannot post any differing opinion on his website, that's too controlled!



4. I love Dr. Phil, I've read most of his books, and this one is a real eye opener.



5. I was apprehensive when my sister gave me this book after my divorce. However, right after the first few pages I realized that this book would bring me back to the real world of singles. I am happy to report that the book is not only very helpfull for those who need to strengthen their self esteem, but also makes you laugh about the fairy tale ideas that most women hear as girls and believed to be true. Dr Phil takes you in a loving journey into your own soul and gives you good pointers on what to look for in a romantic partner in a more realistic and fun way.