5 comments about The Lost Years: Surviving a Mother and Daughter's Worst Nightmare.

1. I have read many books on the subject of addiction from both the addicts experience and the parent. This book is the first book that spoke to the path of recovery for both parties interwoven sequentially where you could see the process to recovery for both parties and how they are really the same.



2. The Lost Years is a must read for anyone in the counseling/addictions field! I was assigned to read this book for a Substance Abuse course and I was a little bit apprehensive to read another book about addictions, but this was not just another book; it was different. The Lost Years gives remarkable insight into the mind/heart/soul/motivations of a young woman addicted to alcohol and cocaine and also the mother's side of the story. I picked up this book in the morning and by the end of the afternoon, I had finished it. I truly could not put it down. A gripping story and a great read for anyone, but a MUST READ for professionals in the field. I think that I will be a better counselor and a better person for having read Kristina and her mother's story. Thank you so much for this book!



3. Having a brother who is a Meth addict really takes a toll on a family. This book helped in so many ways. It lets you know that there are so many families that are going through the same things you are. It also helped me realize why my brother may have become an addict and how hard it is to recover. I think anyone with an addict in the family should read this book.



4. Having lost a sibling to alcohol and drug abuse at a very young age, I wish that this book had been available when he was struggling with his addiction. Perhaps our family could have had some knowledge of the help that was available through Al-Anon. This book is a remarkable account of courage, and I encourage any family facing these issues to pay close attention to what Constance went through to heal herself and protect her other children from this terrible disease and the horrors that go along with it. To date, I have not read anything that even comes close to touching my heart and soul the way that Kristina and Constance touched mine when I read this memoir. I could not put it down.



5. This book gives an excellent look into the uncertain feelings of a teenage girl, and how her choices changed her life. Her events and life walk are depicted from her view, and then from her mother's view. There is an instant snap back to that awkward teenage time. Where do you belong, how do you fit in, and how do you cope? The popular kids (the IT group) share the same fears as the ones who seem to 'not fit in.' It does not matter the way others see you; what matters is the way you see yourself! The way teenagers find comfort is the turning point...some bully their way through and others turn to substance abuse. Either way, it is a dark place that requires the courage and will to come out of (whether one is using bad behavior or substance abuse) or you will most certainly disappear (end up all alone in this world or die). The selfish part of life allows one to foolishly think he/she is the victim and put the blame on the people around him/her. This true view story illustrates how naive reactions and destructive behaviors can shatter a family. This is a must read for parents of approaching teens. This could happen to you!

5 comments about A Drinking Life: A Memoir.

1. A Drinking Life by Pete Hamill is a reflection on his drinking past. Without sentimentality Hamill tells a hard story. He portrays a loving mother, and an alcoholic father. He chronicles his impoverished childhood, his tough coming of age, his difficult search for meaning, his newspaper career, and his regrets about the way he treated his first wife and children. As the title implies his memories are tied together by recollections of alcohol, and a drinking culture that both fascinated and repelled him. The bar was a place of refuge where Hamill could be a man. It was a place to celebrate, to commiserate, to identify with others, to escape loneliness. It was the only place he bonded with his father.
   
   But the bar and the alcohol that fueled it had an evil side. It stifled human consciousness; it dulled pain, boredom, and joy. It allowed unconsciousness in the midst of living. During the 1960's at the peak of his newspaper career he realized drink was making his hands shake when he typed, and his mind so soft he couldn't spell easy words. He quit. Drinking memories ended. Hamill's love for the writing life was more important than his love for booze.
   
   His memoir is not a cautionary tale against using alcohol, nor is it a self-serving whine against the way he was brought up. He writes like the reporter he is. Honest sentences, specificity, and recalled emotion inform his text. He presents clear snapshots of his 1940's childhood in Brooklyn. He lets the reader draw conclusions, or judgments. He presents the characters who walked across his mother's kitchen floor--his Irish father, mostly drunk, and his siblings. He gives us his friends. He moves into the 1950's with raw adolescent energy--lots of sex, lots of booze. Drinking so overpowers the narrative, that at times I felt exhausted just by reading of his drinking binges.
   
   Hamill's talent, in this memoir and in other work, is a passionate love for real life. He spreads humanity on a broad canvas without moralizing. He paints violence, gentleness, loneliness, and companionship. Real life is hard to look at. Hamill gives it to the reader like he gives it to himself. Without bitterness, with humility, with forgiveness, and with compassion.



2. In my quest for chronicles that detail the often entwined aspects of drink and journalism, I was delighted to discover Pete Hamill's candid tale, robust and surly - an account that carries the reader through his lushly-detailed memoirs that began in blue-collared Brooklyn. As the son of struggling Irish immigrants, Hamill grew up during the Depression with the enduring beliefs of the working-class neighborhood in which he lived -street-fights, low pay, loyalty to the neighborhood, and machismo drinking. His tale is rich with the nostalgia of days long past - marbles and stickball, Milton Caniff, Captain America, and the city Athletic League. He details his own lack of connectedness with an alcoholic father he longed to love and vowed not to imitate, only to fall prey to the same lure of the bottle.
   
   Hamill recounts his loss-of-innocence submission to wine at eleven, along with the internalization of the street-tough attitude that shapes his life in the ensuing years. His talent for graphics and natural ability in academics often leads him to the edge of success, only to fall victim to his own self-destruction. Dreams of becoming a cartoonist are interrupted by the reality of a Navy Yard job, yet resurrected again through art lessons from Burne Hogarth, then dulled by a desire to imitate stoic drinkers like Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald. The romantic association of absinthe and literature appeals to Hamill, a seduction that eventually draws him to a career in journalism. He details the rocks and bumps along the way - through newspaper strikes and Mexican jail. His obvious wanderlust takes him from Barcelona to Dublin, Rome to San Juan to Washington D.C., while trying to sustain a turbulent marriage, peppered with an infinite immersion into parties and booze, and eventual divorce.
   
   In 1966, Hamill meets Shirley McLaine at a party in Rome, and he details, very briefly, the eventual celebrity life he shared with her, but shies away from giving us a paparazzi view of truly personal details. Although he denies it, he is perhaps too immersed in drink to recall the nitty gritty. In his final look inward, he describes a New Year's Eve party and his feeling "as if I were shooting the scene with a camera from across the bar...I noticed that my hand was trembling and wondered if that was in the camera shot," - his own personal play that has lasted a lifetime, one written with a bad script that he rewrites at that very moment. Kudos for him.
   
   This is not a book that shows you how to quit drinking; rather, it is a searing, vivid account of one man's recognition of his own problem with alcohol. Despite years of succumbing to the liquor that constantly dragged him into the depths of the gutter, he emerged with a brilliant tale to tell.



3. Pete Hamill"s deeply introspective memoir of his coming of age during the late 40's and 50's in working class Brooklyn is a brutally honest account of how alcohol gets integrated into certain rights of passage as people , especially men navigate the transition to adulthood.
   
   His story could be anyone's, except that Hamill writes in a gripping personal style that infuses each episode in his young life with a sense of urgency. The struggle to reconcile with a distant father never deteriorates into a sense of victimhood. I admired the fact that Hamill is able to describe his youthful feelings of anger toward his father without wallowing in them and always with a sense of someone seeking to understand and forgive.
   
   This is a great book on several levels. Hamill captures a sense of the old neighborhoods of New York that have vanished and the strong influence that a sense of place had on young people of his generation when the world was quite a bit smaller.



4. I picked this book up out of desperation for something, anything to read...and I must admit that the title clinched the deal. "A Drinking Life" - I couldn't resist. Drama, angst, highs, lows...it's all right there in the title.
   
   What I wasn't expecting was a book that depicts a time, place and way of life that has always fascinated me. One of the reasons I love "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn" is the vivid and at the same time, faded sepia description of a New York, and an America that I never knew. I've been to New York twice, have seen touristy parts and not so touristy parts, have been at turns delighted and appalled by its residents...and of course, in that short period of time, barely scratched the surface of this city that almost defies description. Because, of course, there are so many facets to it. New York depends on the area, the time, the circumstances. One person's New York may be a polar opposite of the next person's.
   
   Pete Hamill, in the first half of his memoir, describes the New York of Brooklyn from 1939 to 1950. In this New York, he and his Irish Catholic family struggle to better their situation. They live hand to mouth, in sometimes squalid apartments - too small for a family that keeps growing. And yet - when Hamill spends pages describing the more positive aspects of his childhood - I feel a yearning to be there. To see the far quieter and yet more greatly populated streets. I hope to hear the sounds of stickball, and radios playing jazz and swing into a summer night. I want to feel the safety and connection of a neighborhood that knows each and every member...one that shares the joy of the end of a war that they together shared the dread of.
   
   He describes D day in a New York that had been blacked out for months fearing air raids. "...without warning, the entire skyline of New York erupted into glorious light: dazzling, glittering, throbbing in triumph. And the crowds on the rooftops roared. They were roaring on roofs all over Brooklyn, on streets, on bridges, the whole city roaring for light. There it was, gigantic and brilliant, the way they said it used to be: the skyline of New York. Back again. On D day, at the command of Mayor LaGuardia. And it wasn't just the skyline. Over on the left was the Statue of Liberty, glowing green from dozens of light beams, a bright red torch held high over her head. The skyline and the statue: in all those years of the war, in all those years of my life, I had never seen either of them at night. I stood there in the roar, transfixed."
   
   He also describes his love of books, and words, and comics and the magic that happens when one is drawn into the new world of a story. When you discover a world, an existence, a universe previously unknown.
   
   "But when we lived on Thirteenth Street, the content of the comics was driving deep into me. They filled me with secret and lurid narratives, a notion of the hero, a sense of the existence of evil. They showed me the uses of the mask, insisting that heroism was possible only when you fashioned an elaborate disguise. Most important was the lesson of the magic potion. The comics taught me, and millions of other kids, that even the weakest human being could take a drink and be magically transformed into someone smarter, bigger, braver. All you needed was the right drink."
   
   And there it is, of course. The underlying thread of the book...drinking. From the earliest age, alcohol is everywhere in Hamill's life. In his neighborhood, in his home, even in his history - drinking is an accompaniment to all events, large and small.
   
   When he reads Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, the passage that stands out is one where Jekyll drinks the potion and is transformed in a hideous way..."I read that passage and thought of my father." Hamill is deeply influenced by his father...hating what drinking does to him at the same time he is learning that drinking is what men do.
   
   As the book continues, some of the detail of Hamill's life is lost, certainly because (as he is first to point out) much of it was lost to him as well due to alcohol, but I also got the sense that this part of the book was rushed. It almost felt like Hamill was looking at how much had written about his early life and realizing that he'd better move things along if was ever to finish.
   
   Still - there are passages like these that sucked me right back in. "In the summer of 1950, all of us from the Neighborhood hung out in a place on Coney Island called the Oceantide. Built on the boardwalk at Bay 22, it was a block long complex with a swimming pool, lockers, a long packed bar, and a small fenced-off area where the young men danced with the young women to a bubbling Wurlitzer jukebox. Down the block was a shop called Mary's, which sold the most fabulous hero sandwiches in New York, great thick concoctions of ham and cheese and tomatoes laced with mustard or mayonnaise, along with cases of ice cold sodas."
   
   My mouth waters just thinking about it...I want to be there!
   
   Finally, towards the end, Hamill comes to the realization that he's spent his whole life trying to either be exactly like or nothing like all of the influences in his life. Nothing like his father, and yet just like his father. Exactly like the comic book artists and heroes. Exactly like and nothing like his friends from the Neighborhood. Not only his life, but his writing is an imitation or rejection of that of others.
   
   Which is summed up in the mantra he uses to quit drinking. "I will live my life, I will not perform it." There is much time and experience and emotions that he has lost - but in the end, he is able to find the strength to cut the losses.
   
   "And I loved my life, with all its hurts and injuries and failures, and the things I now saw clearly, and the things I only remembered through the golden blur of drink."



5. Pete Hammill's biography is fascinating from our modern perspective. Seeing the life transition of the author along with the characters in his neighborhood brought that period to life for me. Strong, muscular writing that evokes his experiences in a visceral way. Terrific book.

5 comments about My Way Out: One Woman's Remarkable Journey in Overcoming Her Drinking Problem and How Her Innovative Program Can Help You or Someone You Love.

1. Do not waste your life, or your loved one's life, on this book. 'My Way Out' (MWO) puts you on the wrong path. I wasted $[...] on MYO's recommended self-hypnosis CDs, which were no help at all (and for which I cannot get a refund).
   
   I wasted hours of my time listening to these CDs, only to end up feeling despair because the CDs did nothing either to stop the cravings or end the depression. Talk about anguish! I began to believe there was 'No Way Out' for me, only for other people.
   
   It turns out I'm hypoglycemic--and if you crave alcohol, sweets or caffeine, then chances you are too, or else you are on the fast track to getting there--and the routine physical at your doctor's office doesn't test for hypoglycemia, so don't feel safe simply because your doctor tells you you check out okay. If you have energy highs and lows during the day, then like it or not, you're on your way to trouble. I didn't want to believe it either, but truth is truth.
   
   Larsen's book (Seven Weeks to Sobriety) has real answers. Self-hypnosis isn't one of them.
   
   
   .



2. This book is nothing but a short booklet telling you why you should buy her $500 hypnosis CD set. There is barely any inspirational story at all behind it! DON'T WASTE YOUR MONEY!



3. This is a good book, insightful and helps you out if you hace a problem. The only bad part is she oushes her own vitamins. I did the whole program.
   It gives you the runs, but like anything, takes willpower. I would buy this book if you are at wits end but will do anything.



4. This is not a book that reveals insight for women struggling with alcoholism or alcohol overuse... an insightful "way out"... it is a program that uses toparimate (Topamax). Some people find that they can drink moderately called "Controlled Drinking" by addiction experts when using Topamax. That is also discussed in the book.



5. ****
   This book describes an alternate plan for those who ideally are early to moderate problem drinkers (not heavy drinkers or active alcoholics). It addresses the physiological component of alcohol cravings, not the spiritual or emotional components.
   
   The author, writing under a pseudonym, struggled with alcohol and so developed this program for those for whom AA or clinical treatment would not be desirable options. She describes her own journey to abstinence along with that of a good friend. In one chapter, the two women share excerpts from their journals to demonstrate aspects of the program and how they responded.
   
   The author's program involves five components: the medication Topamax, nutritional supplements, hypnotherapy, exercise, and diet.
   
   Several reviewers have warned readers away from this book; I disagree with their views. This book describes a controversial and cutting edge approach, and is not for heavy drinkers. It is certainly not for everyone. However, if you are open-minded, and read to learn, I am sure that there is information here that could benefit anyone, even those in AA. You may find out about a supplement that could assist you in your recovery, or a dietary approach that makes everything easier.
   
   Since publication of the book, this program has been modified somewhat; there are updates to the program available at mywayout.org. You can also find out more about the program there.
   
   If you desire to moderate your drinking or abstain from alcohol altogether, and if you are looking for alternatives to the conventional route of AA, or enhancements to your AA program, you will benefit from this book.
   
   Recommended.
   ****

5 comments about It Will Never Happen to Me: Growing Up With Addiction As Youngsters, Adolescents, Adults.

1. claudia black is a respected author in the field of addictions. she writes for adults and children for both alcoholics and their families. i have read many books in this area and she is one of my favorite authors. the book is short, accutate,compassionately written, and forever timely. worth reading!



2. This book was recommended by my therapist and after reading it I gave it to a friend who is also an adult child of an alcoholic. I haven't got the book back so I'm buying another copy for myself. I NEED to read it again and again. It opened my eyes and put a lot of the pieces of the puzzle together for me. Although it's hard to face some of the realities this book points out, I believe it to be one of the vital steps I am taking in trying to change my life for the better. It's never too late.



3. This is a great read for anyone who has grown up or is growing up in an alcoholic family. It helps the reader in very simple ways to understand the dynamics of alcoholic families and offers concrete ways of dealing with issues and problems. I recommend it to anyone currently dealing with alcoholism or dealing with the aftermath of an alcoholic upbringing, or even for someone just curious about the effects of alcoholism on families.



4. Still the best introduction to the impact of chemical dependency on the family. I must give about 5 copies of this away to my students every year.



5. This book was a requirement for my Drug and Alcohol Awareness Class. It was a VERY easy and QUICK read. Completely informative and so helpful. Very well written!!!

5 comments about An Adult Child's Guide to What's 'Normal'.

1. This book has been a Godsend! I've read it several times and am now using it in a bookstudy group for an e-mail group I run for people recovering from codependent relationships to sexual addicts. You might not think there was anything "wrong" with your family of origin, but this will help you pinpoint some of the reasons why you may make the bad choices you do in your life, what's healthy and "normal," and steps you can take to learn how to make healthy choices for yourself. Highly recommended! Very good, solid advice delivered in an easy-to-read format, not boring, not "clinical," but written for a wide audience yet not preachy or insulting. Great book!



2. Whoever said it was too cookbook hasn't appreciated the the value of having a thorough one at hand. I loved the Friel's approach. It is a bit harder on the ego than the Woititz ACOA book but this one includes ALL dysfunctions, and I know even after years in recovery I will still find valuable resources in this book to guide me along my bumpy journey. As one who has NO idea what is normal, yet somehow manages to function at the basic level in society, I definitely appreciated the simple yet thorough approach used here.

   This book isn't another "blame the parents--give you an excuse" soother. It requires that we take responsibility for our adult lives, recovery, happiness, misery, relationships, dysfunctional patterns & our future. This book shows me exactly what healthy (they don't believe in the statistical normal, to them normal means emotionally healthy, which is a far more useful definition of the ambiguous term "normal" anyway) living means, looks-smells-tastes-feels like! I can use this book as a check-up to see if I'm on the right track and if not, follow the suggestions or get further help.

   Most of all this book helped me to recognize that recovery isn't an overnight process, can't be done alone in isolation, that I'm human and mistakes are actually a GOOD and WELCOME experience and do NOT have anything whatsoever to do with my self-worth. This book even includes several chapters on how to respond to con artists, abusers & generally rude, mean or unhealthy people. How to deal with zingers, how to set healthy boundaries & protect ourselves & our healthy boundaries, I could go on for pages praising this book.

   I've bought numerous other self-help books & this one was the best. The authors do suggest waiting until one has 2+ years of recovery before tackling this book. To hell with that. Read it now, and every step of the way on your journey. Start feeling better about YOU & your life right NOW, today. Good luck on your journey, happy discoveries to you.




3. If you've had a troubled childhood, this book will amaze you at its accuracy. It knows your problems, perceived "shortcomings", and more. It also gives you the insight into why it happens or why you continue to do it. However, it does NOT give you enough in the way of constructive methods of ridding yourself of these behaviors. While it maintains an upbeat and cheery tone for its entire length, there just isn't enough substance there for my liking.
   
   A little more "how to" would have made this book a 5 star winner.



4. Adult survivors of abuse have only the twisted guidance of screwed-up parents to guide them through life. Only the worst cases of abuse make the news. Some people don't even realize they were abused until they look back on their childhoods with an adult's wisdom and insight - a child often thinks the dysfunctional situation is normal and doesn't realize that this doesn't happen in all families - nor should it. Knowing what's normal is impossible for us - because we never knew what normal was! Essential for the adult survivor



5. A year or so ago I bought a bunch of self-help books blindly online, with the hope they would represent their titles and be of some use to me personally.
   
   Of them, this is the weirdest. It consists of numerous chapters that are only one or two pages long each! That alone is a very strange format, but the content tends to be very uninformative and strange. I'm definitely of the opinion that self-help theories should be elaborated on, that's why one buys a self-help book, isn't it? But the author rambles, introduces new buzzwords at will, and there is none of the sort of elaboration or system here someone who is looking for help would want. Save your money and look for leading recommended books for your problems.

5 comments about Smashed: Story of a Drunken Girlhood.

1. I read Smashed while stuck at an airport half the night due to a tornado in the area and managed to finish it on the airplane on my way back home. While I have to admit the book kept me distracted from my situation, I didn't particularly care for her writing style. The absurd amount of metaphors she used were a bit distracting.
   
   My main problem with the book is that she seems to be glorifying what she went through. She insists she is not an alcoholic and I simply cannot understand that. I am speaking as a person who has much knowledge in alcoholism. There are two forms:
   
   1. Heredity (born addicted)
   2. Alcohol abuse that becomes addicting over a period of time.
   
   The author of this book had her stomach pumped and continued to drink. She experienced black outs, lost her best friend and believes she was possibly date-raped. A person who simply abuses alcohol for pleasure would stop when drinking stops becoming pleasurable. Koren Zailckas did not stop.
   
   I also find it highly doubtful that a therapist on-line would diagnose her condition without ever meeting her. This is extremely unprofessional and unethical. A true and liscenced psychiatrist / counselor / physician would have her schedule an appointment and get her screened. The doctor would also have to run tests and a medical check-up to make sure her health has not deteriorated after a decade of binge drinking (liver damage).
   
   I gave the book two stars because I did find the book mildly entertaining. Her book has a nostalgic tone to it and I did find myself almost reliving my adolescence in certain chapters. My annoyances in the book mostly stemmed from the obviously inexperienced writing style and the obvious lack of maturity from the author.



2. 
   
   I read this in conjunction with 'Blackout Girl'. Both books suffer from the same disease...that the authors think the facts of their life story are interesting in and of themselves. But they are not. Tales of dysfunctional parents and wild debauchery may make for a good hour on the Jerry Springer Show, they do not necessarily make interesting reading.
   
   The other issue is that most of the writing is cliched and trite to the point of exhaustion. It did get to the point where I could not finish this book....it no longer seemed worth the investment of time.



3. When I first picked up the book I thought it was fiction. I got into bed and at first was disappointed to find out it was not. However I decided to give it a chance. I was hooked right away. My breath was stolen while I connected to the writer. At my age now I look at my adolescence and young adulthood as if it was someone else but while reading that book it brought back so much emotion. I encouraged my friends and sister to read it because I felt we all could relate and everyone has loved this book. The stories may be shocking, sad, and/or appalling but it happens. It is very real.



4. This book isn't about alcohol abuse, really. It's about a girl from a priviledged family who grows up with lots of friends, becomes a college cheerleader/sorority sister, interns in New York, makes and maintains friendships along the way, and should be an all-around productive, happy citizen. But this girl, from an early age, wants to be a writer. She is especially awestruck by tortured female writers, like Sylvia Plath and Virginia Woolf. I think she assumed that to be a great writer/poet, suffering is essential. Her driving force isn't alchohol, it's the pretense of alcohol abuse because it makes her appear to be tortured. She thinks misery drives creativity. Many great writers/artists are and were indeed lost souls, many with mental health problems. But the author's problems are all self-inflicted. "Look at how much I drink...I'm so tortured! Feel sorry for me!"
   The more I read this book, the more I got the feeling that she had created a character in her own mind and was living it out. Maybe she should have gone into dramatic performance instead of writing. I wonder if the feminists she so hopelessly wants to impress with her smug treatment of men, are indeed impressed by her? She is certainly impressed enough with herself, blaming her actions on everyone around her.
   I got the impression that once she felt that she had suffered enough, she had a book to write. If you continually choose to place yourself in stupid situations, that just makes you stupid, not deep. If you continually remain emotionally and physically detached from "boys," and play mind games with them, guess what, they're not going to stick around. It doesn't make you smarter than them, just more pathetic. This story is like a whiny love letter the author wrote to herself--"See, you are so tortured and filled with angst, you have suffered so greatly, you are a writer!" Making stupid choices and employing the overuse of simile and metaphor doesn't create a great writer...just an annoying story that is written in an annoying manner.



5. I definitely had my party years and some of Koren's life experiences seem to match my own. She doesn't hold back anything and her honesty about the Greek system is accurate. I feel a little less guilty now that I know someone else had the same thoughts running through their head that I did during these less than virtuous moments. I enjoyed this book, but there is a constant sadness in her writing that makes you want to hug yourself and say, "It will be better tomorrow." If you like reading about Greek Life,then you should also read COLLEGE LIFE EXTREME: Lies, Sex, Drugs and Violenceand Pledged: The Secret Life of Sororities. Thanks Koren for sharing so much about your life with us! Your book will always have a special place on my bookshelf.

5 comments about Parrot in the Oven: Mi vida.

1. Manuel is fourteen years old and living close to the Mexican border. He is Mexican-American himself. His life is full of conflicts, from his father who is alcoholic and abusive and can't seem to keep a job, to his passive mother who lets herself be scared and abused, to his three siblings.
   
   This books is about Manuel's struggle to find himself and to figure out his life. It takes the reader on a journey through about a year in Manuel's life, and we get to see the things he interacts with daily, from his family situation to the bullies who live on his street, to the other people who surround him. Even though he sometimes has problems, like when he is invited to a party full of all white kids and things start to go bad, Manuel always manages to keep his head on his shoulders and get through things okay. Even though his family is dysfunctional, the reader is able to see some good in them.
   
   The language in this book is beautiful; the author has a gift for stringing together very poetic sentences. However, there wasn't any sort of cohesive storyline. I kept trying to wrestle the individual parts of the story into a plot, and was frustrated when they remained disjointed until the end.



2. I'm sorry but I really do not see what was special in Martinez' *Parrot in the Oven* that reaped him some awards. I did not see anything special about the story. However, I do agree that Martinez does have a way with words. They were eye-catching and made you wonder.
   
   *Parrot in the Oven* is divided into chapters that each one focuses on one particular topic. While there is a subtle storyline throughout, the overall picture is blurred. There's that "missing link" that prevents you from knowing each characters in the book. Simply, there's no depth other than with Manny.
   
   The book is told from Manny's perspectives. His dad has lost his job. He simply goes to the local pool hall and spends whatever money he can find and gets drunk. The mother is constantly cleaning the house. His older brother is never home and constantly has a new job. His older sister is secretive. His baby sister is simply a brat.
   
   Manny tells his experiences with school, White people, boxing, and the gang. Most of all, he tells how these experiences impact his family and their world-view.
   
   *Parrot in the Oven* is an alright book. It's nothing that you'd go around and recommend this book to friends. Just simply ok. The only best thing is Martinez' ways with words.



3. We think that this book is good for kids who are age 10 and up. Our favorite part of the book is when Victor has family problems with his mom and dad. This is one of the most important parts of the book that many students can relate to. The book is about a boy named Victor with family problems, and the reader learns about his entire life. The people who would like this book are people who enjoy real life stories, such as an autobiography.



4. The book was okay. The story is about a 14 year old, Mexican-American named Manny. He lives somewhere near the United States, Mexico border. Manny lives with his alcoholic father, his distant mother, his brother and two sisters. Manny's family is very poor, this is because his father refuses to work, leaving Manny and his brother Bernado to support the family. Manny's mother spends all of her time taking care of her youngest daughter, and cleaning the house. Manny is forced to deal with bullies, who pester him and his brother. The book did lack a plot. There was really no point to the story, it was just about the struggles of an average 14 year old boy. This was not a book I would recommend purchasing, it wasn't anything special.



5. "Mr. Hernandez" We're going to have to take your rifle away." This is a quote from the book Parrot in the Oven about a boy named Manny who is 14 years old and has two sisters and a brother. He is Mexican and lives in the projects in Los Angeles. He lives with his mom and dad. His dad is an alcoholic who gets mad at his family easy. Once he even tried to shoot his wife. His mom cleans the house all day. Manny is trying to get respect but he can't get it. The only way to get respect where Manny lives is to join a gang. He knows that is not the right way to get respect. There are many people who pick on Manny but some get scared because he has a tough older brother. He has a good relationship with his brother Benardo. The main problem is he doesn't get respect
   When I was reading this book I could relate a lot to it. His is from a Mexican family. There are many choices he has to make everyday. He has many difficult problems a lot of young Latino immigrants face in their lives. His family is always having a lot of stress in their family. Manny doesn't like the stress because he doesn't get respect. Every time his parents are stressed out and give him respect. Since they are they always worry about money. His family are not the only ones who don't give him respect. Also some of the other kids he knows in his neighborhood He is poor and his mom supports him in going to school.
   I will recommend this book to someone who is into life and growing up books. I think he wrote about experiences he had in his life. I think he is also to make right choices.

5 comments about 7 Weeks to Safe Social Drinking: How to Effectively Moderate Your Alcohol Intake.

1. This book has been a lifesaver for me. For years I enjoyed social drinking without problems, but the last couple of years I've questioned if I was drinking too much. This program showed me how to pace my drinking, how to make a drinking plan in advance before I started drinking(which really worked)and how to stick to my limit fairly easily. It also made alcohol less important to me - a huge step in the right direction to get back on the healthy social drinking path again. I recommend this book to anyone questioning their drinking. It's a straightforward approach to drink less and drink appropriately.



2. I don't know if I was a problem drinker or alcoholic. I don't care - I'm not into labels. But I do know I wanted to drink less and become less dependent on alcohol. And 7 Weeks helped me. One message in the book is you've got to take responsibility for your drinking instead of chalking it up to genes or a bad childhood or whatever. Another message is you can change if you want to. And Cornett gives concrete tips to cut down.
   
   Who care if you're a "problem drinker" or "alcoholic"? If you want to drink less and have a healthier relationship with alcohol, 7 Weeks is for you. I'd pay twice the price for this book if I had to do it all over again.



3. The book is well written and includes good guidelines to follow if you are not a serious drinker.



4. This is the best book I've read about moderate drinking and how to get there.
   
   Most of the time I don't have a problem with alcohol but sometimes it takes
   over and I drink too much. I have found the suggestions in this book invaluable,
   especially pre-planning my drinking behavior with the tips in the program,
   eating while I'm drinking and watching the clock to slow down my drinking.
   That's just for starters. Cornett gives lots of tips and also works on your
   attitude about alcohol and its importance in your life.
   
   I think this book could change the world and have given it to friends who
   drink too much.



5. I've really cut down on my drinking with this book! This program was simple, easy to follow and you don't have to take drugs to drink less. I've read several other moderate drinking books but this is the best one.
   The other ones were too vague or wanted you to take prescription meds (which I think is ridiculous)to be successful with their programs. Not for me.
   As a mom and professional woman I would have a lot to lose if I developed a serious drinking problem. This book showed me the way so I can have a couple of drinks, enjoy myself, but never worry about drinking too much. Thank you Donna Cornett and Drink/Link!

1 comments about Relapse Prevention Counseling Workbook: Managing High-Risk Situations.

1. Gave as a gift to a coworker who was promoted. He love it because easy to follow exercise for the population he is working with.

4 comments about How Al-Anon Works for Families & Friends of Alcoholics.

1. This book is a wonderful basic text on the principles of the Alanon program, a program of recovery for anyone who has an addict in their lives. It explains how addiction warps those close to the addict, the behaviors that ensue and finally healthier behavior. It's provides a way out of the prison that's constructed when a family or friend faces the frustration of living with and loving an alcoholic/addict. Buy this book for YOU if you're in this situation..and stop the madness.



2. for those of us who have a drinking or sober alcoholic in our past or present (and god, don't most of us!), this book can help. it's beautifully yet simply written and gently lays out a new philosophy for life, one in which we can learn to keep the focus on ourselves and our behavior, be honest but in an appropriate way, and be kind but firm - with boundaries. this book offered me a whole new idea of what love and life are and can be, and encouraged me to walk forward in a healthy direction like few books have.

   another strong plus is that it offers many personal stories - of how and why a wide range of people got into al-anon and how their recovery has been progressing, and each told by the individuals themselves, starting with Lois W., al-anon's co-founder, the wife of Bill W., the founder of AA.

   this is a wonderful book and i recommend it highly!




3. If you have any questions about the fellowship of Al-anon, I feel you can find most of the answers here. this book goes into detail about the history of the program, the steps, Members experience, strength and hope. It also has Meeting guidlines, the opening, the closing, the slogans ect. It works if you work it! AND YOU ARE WORTH IT!



4. At first I wanted to throw this book away. I didn't need it! My spouse was drinking. Why did I need help?
   
   Well I did. I was codependent. I was enabling. I was a mess. I started to go to Al-Anon meetings. I could not find the book for 5 months. I reread it the other night. Reread is too strong - because the first time I skimmed it - the first 2 chapters. Then I came back to it and saw on pages 32 and 33 - how I was UNABLE to control alcoholism. How I was UNABLE to fix the disease in my wife. It said, I wasn't to blame. It said, stop fighting and arguing, you (I) was only making the the DISEASE stronger (more arrogant, more coniving, more deceitful).
   
   I used several quotes in my blog. We have Weekend Online Al-Anon meetings every weekend on my Al-Anon Diary (title) and you can see my life unflod in my ups and downs and my struggle to live with an alcoholic. It is hard
   
   So join us on-line at the Al-Alon Diary and get this book if you are going to Al-Anon.