5 comments about Mistaken Identity: Two Families, One Survivor, Unwavering Hope.

1. This is a touching book about two families caught up in a tragedy that no one should ever have to live through. It is not about the gory details so much as it is about how their Christian faith got them through. Due to all the religious references throughout, those who do not share their intense Christian faith might be disappointed by this book. It doesn't really dwell on the complex feelings that surround the death of a loved one. Their faith is so strong that they don't have time to dwell on much else. And I realize that everyone reacts to death in a different way. Right up front, you need to know that this is only the Van Ryns' and the Ceraks' experience.
   
   There are some technical writing/grammar issues here and there and yet I found the story so amazingly powerful that I was able to ignore that. The way the book was set up was near-perfect. I've read books like this before that sort of wander all over the place but this was very straight-forward and to the point. It begins with the phone call where the Ceraks learn that Whitney is still alive and then it goes back in time to the night of the accident. From there on out, it switches back and forth between the two families as they explain what life was like for them after April 26, 2006 (the day of the accident). The alternating family viewpoints don't always match-up time-wise, but I found the book to be fairly easy to follow. I found the final page of the final chapter to be a moving end to a well-told story of faith and hope amidst unimaginable heartbreak. The final chapter was followed by an epilogue, written by Whitney.
   
   Yes, there were times when I wondered if the family members were relating back to the reader what they were feeling exactly at each moment in time. I kind of wondered if some of what they claimed to be feeling at the time was really what they were feeling as they wrote the book, a year or so after the fact. I can't even begin to imagine what an experience like that must have been like, so I don't want to pretend like I do. All I know is that there were times when I wondered, "Is that really how it happened or is that only how she remembers it now that she's had time to think it over?" I'm not saying this to criticize them. I'm sure they did the best they could to describe what it was like. It couldn't have been easy. Far from it. I just say that because I want to warn people that it might seem unbelievable at times. And it is a story that is unbelievable anyway, though we know these events are what happened. For the most part, I thought they did a very good job describing what it was like to go through the things they went through. But like I said before, it must be hard to describe exactly how it felt and everyone deals with tragedy differently anyway. I think the emotional heart of the story remains intact, even though the book seems to gloss over the complexities of the grieving process. I think it's possible they didn't want to get into the nitty-gritty of everything they were thinking, and you know, if that's the case, that's fine. I respect that. The important thing is that they are trying to make the best of a horrible situation. For that alone, I admire them. I think if you're looking for an honest look at the grieving process, you might question this book. I think what you have to do is take this not as a blueprint to follow precisely so much as an offering of hope and a challenge to reach out to others even when its hard. As Christians do believe, no one is perfect and all anyone can do is try their best.
   
   I don't agree with those who complain about all the religious references. I understand where people are coming from. But remember, this is the Van Ryns' and the Ceraks' story, as they lived it. Not as the reader wishes it to be told. In a day and age when the gut reaction is to sue the pants off anyone and everyone, it is refreshing to read a book like this where the two families had every reason in the world to feel bitterness and anger and yet chose hope over blame. That is really what makes this book the powerful story that it is. It was faith that allowed them to do that. Yeah, you could argue that non-Christians are capable of that too, but they're not writing about a non-Christian's experience. They're writing about their own. Better to write fully about their own than to spread themselves thin and try to write about everyone's. And there's no reason to indulge in all the little sensationalistic details for the sake of satisfying the public's curiosity. And if they'd toned down the faith angle so as to appeal to a larger audience, that would have been dishonest. It's faith that got them through this so why should they pretend otherwise? It's easy enough to keep your interviews neutral when you only have to give a basic summary of what happened. But when writing an entire book, it's a little harder to do that. To be honest, I don't think they could have even really explained how the mix-up happened, beyond giving us the answers that everyone already knew. I think it's one of those things that you just live through and you'll never fully understand how or why it happened. So all we can really say is that it's something that can and should be avoided in the future. And it was very touching to see how these two families saw it as an opportunity to grow in their faith and bond with someone they might not have otherwise. And they used this as an opportunity to reach out to others. They didn't have to. Nobody forced them to write this book. They chose to. They weren't obligated to write it in any way but the way they did. They only had a responsibility to be as truthful about their own experience as they could be. They included everything they could reasonably be expected to include. It's just that you can't please everyone, nor should you try to.
   
   
   I gave it a four but it's more of a 3 1/2. I would recommend it, but I realize there are probably lots of people who wouldn't really appreciate it. I can't claim it will be liked by everyone.



2. Believe it or not, I came to this book through a TV show. What's really ironic about that is I don't even have TV. My boyfriend and I run a bookstore, and most of our time, energy, and focus is caught up with books and the day-to-day needs of our business. Why bother paying for TV when most of it is junk, and we don't have time anyway? We do, however, like "House", and so we rent the DVDs. I saw an episode from Season 4 -- I believe it was the opening episode -- about two young women who worked in an office building that collapsed. I won't give everything away, but suffice it to say, their identities were mixed up. I talked to a friend about how much that episode touched me, stayed with me, had me reflecting on it for days. She suggested this book.
   
   The story seems unbelieveable, as many people have said -- more like a storyline for a TV show or a movie than something that could really happen in real life.
   
   I hate to join in the "circus-for-free" syndrome that we seem to have, almost helpless to turn our eyes away from the accident scene, the smoke pouring out the windows of the burning building, the crumbled buildings and bodies left in the wake of the latest disaster shown on the news. Nevertheless, this story was so compelling. I had to known more about what transpired, what the families went through, how the mix-up happened. I believe and respect that the only reason these families agreed to write their blog, do some media interviews, and eventually do this book was the opportunity to share their faith.
   
   I grew up in the church, but I have often stayed on the perimeter, uncomfortable with so many things done and said in the name of Christianity. I am often uncomfortable with stories as heavily evangelical as this. In this case, I was so proud of the Van Ryns and the Ceraks. They are living their faith, and sharing it beyond "the shadow of the valley of Death", being content in all things because of the One who strengthens them, tested like Job. I was not "turned off" this story by how much they told it by faith. I was deeply touched.



3. i got this book to learn more about this tragic accident and how whitney is dong not but it didn't fufil my expections it was reallg good adn really detaild but almost too much in some areas this book is defintley for evangelicle christans because their is a lot of prayers adn refernces to the bible so be prepared for that. i have osay that i am not one to read books fast and a person that can't put a book down and this is one of the few i couldn't put dowm i read it in 2.5 days



4. The story line of this book is fascinating and intriguing. It evokes many strong emotions as you walk through the events these families lived through. One is drawn into the theme right from the beginning and the book holds your attention throughout. As I read about Laura in the hospital and how many times people questioned many things that did not add up, it baffled me as to how this family could have been so blind to not have recognized that this girl was not theirs sooner. They seemed to be in some kind of fog or deluded state even though they claim to be such strong Christians throughout. Several inferences were made about the discrepancies of the girl not being Laura such as a mysterious navel piercing none of her family knew of, the bag of clothes and type of shoes not being hers that were given to the family very early on and were never questioned. Even when Laura began opening her mouth they noticed her teeth were not the same but continued to remain ignorant. Understandably, she was bandaged and injured when they first saw her, but as she healed and her face became more recognizable, those closest to her seemed to be out to lunch somewhere, still not perceiving all those signs that it was not Laura. It really becomes ludicrous that these people could be so ignorant and prolong this ordeal in such an odd way. The family of Whitney did not go in to identify her body either, so all these behaviors seem a bit askew in the real world. I do not comprehend this kind of behavior given my own personality and curiosity about things. Even Aunt Ruthann, a distant relative seemed to know right away, so how could the closest family members not recognize that this was not their daughter after being with her day and night constantly for five weeks? I will quote the one section that was most profound: "Ruthann scrunched up her face like she had bitten into something sour. I don't care what anyone says, that doesn't look like Laura to me." Even then nobody followed through on investigating this girl's identity time and time again. Their portrayed strong faith in God makes it seem like a bit of a travesty that he would put them through all these things needlessly and they remain oblivious. It is hard for me to believe in their continued concepts of God and their religious beliefs. They do tend to deal with the tragedies they are going through with faith and even humor at times. The way that total strangers showed up to help the family with housing, food and water, even neighbors mowing their lawn while they were away from home was astounding, it really restores ones faith in mankind helping when needed. The book could have been written in a more interesting style; the emotions of those involved could have been more clearly conveyed. Overall, it is a good read and one that really stirs up your emotions and thinking processes, it is almost borderline on being a mystery.



5. Mistaken identity was a story of two women, one killed tragically and one hurt and comatose. I read this book in two days. I couldn't put it down. I think at first it is a story about how trauma can put you in denial and question what is right in front of you, but then once acceptance is obtained, it shows how strength is drawn from faith and friends and love of family. These were two amazing families. I honestly cannot imagine the trauma that they both went through. An amazing story and an easy read. It makes you appreciate every moment of life.

5 comments about Lucky: A Memoir.

1. While not always pleasant to read, I found Lucky more compelling and much more likeable than that drivel-fest book, The Lovely Bones. Lucky is a blunt first-hand account of surviving rape, and its long-term effects on the victim, including physical and emotional trauma and, consequentially, its indirect impact on the victim's loved ones. I'd recommend it to all women, if not for reading pleasure, then at least as an eye-opener.



2. 
   The differences between Sebold's memoir and fiction are vast. In "Lucky" as opposed to "The Lovely Bones" words are hammered in, staccato and short, understated. I liked both books, but I do have to point out it is as if they were written by different writers. In looking over the reviews people seem to hate one and love the other or vice versa, and I think it's a shame. Lovely Bones is like a poem: dreamy. Lucky is dry and aches like a bad knee. They're both excellent, just different.
   
   Lucky is about Sebold's experience as rape survivor, her eventual court experience, and the sad aftermath of her first two years of college. It's no secret that I've been raped myself and am in litigation regarding it up to my neck so it was interesting to see my own reaction. It's a helpful book to read in regards to coming to terms and being honest regarding rape. It's very grounding.
   
   Sebold's almost obsessional use of detail throughout some parts of the book juxtapose with her complete blanks on other seemingly very important details quite realistically. Her harsh rhythm describes, in many ways, my own blank face when trying to plow through describing to lawyers exactly what happened to me. Certainly a book is a safer place to let loose than a courtroom is, and yet she treats her book like a courtroom, as if everyone is standing in judgment of her, particularly her own self to her own self.
   
   What rang the most truthful was Sebold's masochistic honesty, her seeming wish to drive a stake in every relationship she had had prior to her rape. Likewise, her roommate's rape did the same.
   
   Her sentence-style, syntax, etc, reminded me of Hemingway, each sentence an arrow, pointing to a destination, each point drawn taut and clearly. She hit a bull's eye, no doubt.



3. From the opening pages, Sebold tells the reader a truly horrifying story of her rape in accurate and quite graphic detail. And whilst horrified at what she has endured, you want to read more - to see how someone survives an attack like that, and what life is like for a rape victim in the hours, days and week afterwards. I couldn't put this book down - a combination of great writing and admiration for the author, made this a compelling read.



4. Lucky is a thought provoking book that helps readers understand rape from the victim's perspective. Written in an honest manner, it explores the rational and sometimes irrational reactions of everyone involved - whether victim, friend, or family member.
   
   Seabold opens the book with a vivid description of her brutal rape. Initially, this makes it a difficult read because it forces readers to live through a brutal act. However, it also helps to expose a reader's preconceived notions and biases. Seabold describes her struggles to return to a normal life and she honestly discusses societal issues that favor the criminal and penalize the victim. This is a good read for anyone looking for some insight into a difficult issue.



5. 
   I don't recommend this book to anyone who enjoys prose or literature. Sebold's use of a stripped down, matter-of-fact tone desensitizes her story. Though her rape was a traumatic event, I couldn't feel for her. Perhaps it was her intent not to draw out feeling to avoid pity but personally, I think it was uneffective in conveying her complete story because a memoir needs an emotional plot as well.
   
   I wanted to put down this book before I was even half way though there were still many unfinished subplots like the conviction of her rapist.
   
   I would expect this book in the children's/ preteen section if it weren't for the detailed account of the rape.

No comments about Amarcord: Marcella Remembers.

5 comments about Walden.

1. Back in high school this was required reading...not the whole thing but a decent chunk. Pretty much all of us became obsessed with this book and we'd talk about it all the time, both during and after class. Our teacher was really good at his job, but this is also simply and amazing book. It's really a masterpiece.



2. This book is fantastic. It's one of my favorite books along with Desert Solitaire by Edward Abbey. The Transcendentalists really knew what was going on. In our consumeristic times, it is necessary to learn how to simplify. That is what Thoreau was all about.



3. Something about the way the book was put together, literally- the size of the book is too big and you cannot hold it right because the print is all the way to the middle crease. Very akward. Disappointed- damn cheap publisher! My mom has an old extra copy she is going to give me. This is going to goodwill.
   
   Thoreau is awesome. Too bad the book doesn't live up to his words.



4. The service was prompt, the book was brand new, and cheaper than the list price!!!



5. This book should be required reading for every high school and college student in every school in the country. Our narcissistic, throwaway, gadget-intoxicated society needs to hear Thoreau's message about the satisfaction gained through living simply, and about the difference between want and need. Not to mention his pronouncement that we do not own our possessions but are rather owned and enslaved by them.

5 comments about Clapton: The Autobiography.

1. I am a big clapton fan and have read many things about him. this bio has many interesting stories, mostly about his interactions with other bands, they are funny and cool to know about. however, this bio does not go into much depth into his albums, songs or simple band histories. he dedicates few pages to cream and derek and the dominos and does not really go into detail how and when he really progressed as a guitar player. he makes it seem like he just suddenly began to be glorified randomly. if you are interested in clapton and want to find a more detailed story about his musical upbringing and many bands i would suggest Crossroads by Michael Schumacher. thats a solid read.



2. It came in better condition than I expected(which was excellent). Very quick shipping as well.



3. ...and thusly I wasn't disappointed. My father lent me his copy, and I noticed once I began that there was a book marker in the second to last chapter, making me wonder if he was able to get through the book.
   
   I already had a pretty good idea that Eric Clapton is/was/has been a sorry human being. Yes that is very harsh, and I understand that he came from a dysfunctional family, as the book makes clear. I have enjoyed most of his music over the years, and I do credit him with making an attempt to help other people battle the demons he has. That said, I am so very grateful not to have had him as my father, and I would probably not recommend him for anyone seeking treatment for chemical dependency. Let the professionals handle that.
   
   Like others, I also noticed the glaring absence of elaboration in the deaths of George Harrison. I don't know if they had a falling out that just isn't mentioned, or if George didn't want to be disturbed during his last months, but it seems that it should have been discussed, since Eric had no problem exposing a lot of very personal details about Patti and many others. And I don't mean to be judgmental, but I laughed out loud when he flippantly mentioned how his relationship with his new wife--so many years into sobriety--developed. But hey, his heroes all got around, used and threw away women, gave them children they didn't want, and his own father (and mother) were absent from his life. He had lousy role models, and many celebrities seem to live by a different set of rules. At least he has stated that he really wants to end the cycle of broken homes.
   
   Still, I'm highly skeptical that the jet-setter he's become is conducive to being a decent part-time dad to two different families, even if his touring schedule slows down. He doesn't seem happy to stay anywhere...England is too dark and cold for him, but California and the Carribean only seem to provide temporary respite until he becomes homesick for England again.
   
   Don't get me wrong, I do have a healthy respect for the guy. It does take a lot of courage for someone who spent most of his life as a spoiled brat to tell anyone who'll listen what a flawed person he's been. I'll let slide most of the positive things he has to say about himself (which I do agree often come off as boasting) since I don't think anyone's going to be interested in 300+ pages of pure self-pity.
   
   I won't say it's a waste of time to read. It is interesting to get his perspective on a lot of things, such as the music business, the places he's traveled, people he's interacted with, and the time period in which he's lived. Just don't expect to find a whole lot of reconciliation. He does seem to have come more to terms with himself, with his wealth and fame and responsibilities, but it seems like he's still let a lot of personal relationships sour. He's come a long way and it seems like he's on the right road, but he's still got a lot of growing up to do, in my opinion.



4. an excellent book. i wish it was longer.but the 60's and early 70's were a blur for him.



5. Have been an Eric Clapton music and live performance fan all my life. But the book is disappointing. It has no insights. It is a rambling description of a life spent in a haze. I would stick with the music and forget about his personal life, which should have remained private if there were no take aways from it.
   
   He does come through as very honest.

5 comments about A Man Named Dave: A Story of Triumph and Forgiveness.

1. I have to admit that his books are compelling but I didn't think they were convincing. There were a lot of unanswered questions and non enough substantial information to make it real to me.



2. It was very exciting to find out how his adulthood went for him. I give Dave a lot of credit for forgiving his mother after all she put him through. God bless this man for sharing his life story. Hopefully, this will help other abuse victims out.



3. The book is just as good as expected after the first 2, if not better.



4. This book is the conclusion to a trilogy written by Dave Pelzer. The other two were A Child Called "It" and The Lost Boy. All three are touching stories that arouse a range of emotions and are filled with the unbelievable horrors of child abuse and its aftermath.
   
   This book provides flash backs to Dave's physical and mental abuse at the hands of his mentally ill mother, his rescue by school teachers, his life in and out of foster and juvenile homes, his escape and success to and with the air force, getting to know his biological family, his struggle learning social skills, coping with the death of his father, living with and marrying a woman he did not love, becoming a father, learning to trust, helping others, forgiving his mother, finding love, and succeeding as an author and "speaker."
   
   David Pelzer's story as a survivor of one of the most horrific cases of child abuses ever documented is a must read for people of all ages and backgrounds who come into contact with children to recognize and help prevent this kind of crime to humanity.
   
   Dave's ability to describe and articulate his fears and feelings have touched the heartstrings of teachers, medical providers, police, social workers, legislators, parents, and numerous other people in our communities and have undoubtedly saved the lives of thousands of children.
   
   Thanks for bearing your soul Dave, you touched our heart and saved precious lives!



5. As I read this book, I was so captivated and distraught at times. It touched me to the core and made me cherish and value life more. This is the last book of the trilogy by David Pelzer and the ending couldn't have been more befitting. How a beautiful family is destroyed due to the alcoholism of the parents stands at the core of this really brutal tale. If it was a work of fiction, one might just dismiss it, but the fact that a mother could be so brutal to her son, is just so very incomprehensible! The fact that the tragic life of Dave ends in triumph gives immense satisfaction to me as a reader. It's simply amazing how he survives through sheer determination and immense will power and eventually triumphs.
   The most poignant lesson here is the human ability to forgive. And Dave does forgive his mom in the end, thereby making him a `real' man. His challenges in life did not leave him bitter and resentful, in fact they compelled him on a greater course in life whereby he helped millions of kids who have suffered like him.

5 comments about The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (Vintage International) (Vintage International).

1. omg
   this book
   as i said, i read this in 1 evening
   guzzling coffee, carrying the book to the kitchen along as i refilled my mug, reading, underlining, scribbling quotes down for later meditation, i immediately lent it to a friend, and left voicemails on phones for others to read it, like yesterday, this is a must have for anyone, but especially for you if you sometimes wonder why life is special, just as it is.
   please get it
   that will make me happy
   and you know that's what its all about
   :)



2. Jean-Dominique Bauby's "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" is a truly moving and inspirational memoir by a man rendered incapable of any communication except for the blinking of his left eye and very slight head movement. Bauby had suffered from a stroke, which led to what is so aptly known as `locked-in-syndrome'.
   
   Bauby, a distinguished journalist who had been editor-in-chief at Elle, famously used his one book contract with a publisher (signed before the stroke) to write this memoir by recounting his story through blinking his left eye to spell out every letter of every single word to an interpreter/assistant who would recite a special frequency arranged alphabet to Jean-Do.
   
   This fascinating and unbelievable pretext sticks with the reader throughout the memoir, with it so often seeming amazing that such lucid and vivid metaphors and accounts of life could be communicated by a man in such an imprisoned state.
   
   From his refusal to pity himself or lament his situation, to his heart-wrenching yet moving description of his plight as that of being trapped in a "cocoon", with his inability to move any part of his body being likened to being forever imprisoned by an old-fashioned diving suit, Bauby constantly moves the reader with his courage and heightened state of awareness. By declaring his situation as not a burden, but instead an opportunity to free his mind and let it take "flight like a butterfly", Bauby delivers a memoir that is so precious for demonstrating a man's noble minded acceptance of fate, and embracement of opportunity.
   
   Jean-Do's memoir recounts his time at the hospital in France where he is left to try and rehabilitate following his stroke. There is a constant strong sense of humour evident from the author, with Jean-Do wittily noting that seeing as his original idea for a novel (conceived prior to the stroke) had coincidentally involved a victim of locked-in-sydrome, he had considered making the new hero of his book "not a paralytic but a runner" in the hope of achieving another coincidental turn of events. This sense of humour and ability to look at the bright side of things underlines Bauby's ability to connect with the reader, putting them at ease whilst at the same time discarding the possible misconception that a person in his state would be incapable of retaining their wit, or any sort of personality.
   
   Throughout the book, it is Bauby's amazing strength of will and spirit that remains at the forefront of the readers mind. Despite the tragic and disheartening situation that he remains in, Bauby shows no hesitance in opening up a new chapter in his life. Despite such huge emotional challenges like being unable to hug his own child, or shake a fly off his nose, Jean-Do finds a way to live his life in a fulfilling way, avoiding the depression and grief that would be so tempting to succumb to.
   
   What makes this memoir so great is that it provides an example for all of us to follow. The inspirational message underpinning Bauby's work is inescapable, and leaves the reader with a far greater appreciation of their life, reminding them to enjoy the numerous simple, yet joyful pleasures we so often take for granted.



3. I learned for some men passion and lust is more important than love no matter how painful.



4. I SAW THE MOVIE WHICH WAS EXCELLENT AND WANTED TO GET THE BOOK TO GET A MORE INDEPTH PICTURE. HE HAD A RARE OPPORTUNITY TO REALLY LET PEOPLE INTO HIS WORLD AND TELL US WHAT IS GOING THROUGH YOUR MIND WHEN YOU WAKE UP AND CAN'T MOVE. HOW DO YOU COPE WITH THAT. AND HOW DO YOU GET FROM THAT PLACE TO A PLACE WHERE YOU ACCEPT AND ACTUALLY SEE BEAUTY IN YOUR LIFE. HE NEVER SHARES ANY OF THIS. HE RAMBLES ON AND ON (WHICH IS PRETTY HARD TO DO "TALKING" WITH ONE EYE) HE TALKS ABOUT PLACES HE HAS BEEN AND PEOPLE HE KNOWS BUT ONLY TOUCHES ON THE EXPERIENCE HE'S HAVING WITH LOCKED IN SYNDROME. WATCH THE MOVIE IT'S BETTER.



5. I have mixed feelings about this book. On one hand, it is insightful and inspiring to read the true story of the editor of Elle Magazine who had a stroke, became unable to movie anything except for his left eye, and still managed to write this book. Some parts of the book may move you to tears if you're able to connect with the author's own anguish.
   
   On the other hand, the book as a whole seems rather bland and seems to be missing the spark that so many people said the movie had. It is a quick read, and if you keep in mind that the book was written by a completely immobile person, it serves as a powerful inspiration that we truly are much more than our bodies. However, if you remove that fact... the book is, at best, average.

5 comments about Three Weeks with My Brother.

1. I gave the book as a gift to the girlfriend of my son. She was so delighted and happy because she has been trying to find that book for a long time. I was glad that I made her happy. Thanks to Amazon! You can find things at Amazon.com that you dont find anywhere else.



2. Three Weeks with My Brother
   I am not a fan of fiction, so when I found this memoir, I thought I'd give it a try. (I have never read Sparks' fiction works, though I have seen some of the movies.)
   
   The book was amusing at first--stories from his early childhood. I was suprised at the lack of supervision the Sparks kids received and their strange upbringing; it reminded me of another favorite memoir: Zippy. However, as the book progressed, I became more interested in the lives of these kids and what drove each of them to succeed in different ways.
   
   Three Weeks was cleverly written--each chapter a brief summary of what the brothers saw on their three-week tour, followed by a lengthier recollection of the events in their lives. I found myself both wanting to join them on the tour of these sights around the world and wanting to keep reading what happened in their pasts. It is also very personal. The emotions expressed--whether the grieving that they experienced or the individual faults they exposed in themselves--told more than words about these two men. I would believe that with two of them writing this book, it is presents a pretty accurate picture of their childhoods and who they have become.
   
   I cannot believe the pain the Sparks brothers have endured over the years, but it is a blessing that they are so dear to one another. I don't think the book is going to lure me into reading his fiction books, though I do find it interesting that most of his books have been inspired by the tragedies he's lived through.



3. Not only is this story a memoir of the three-week trip around the world, it is an autobiography of their childhood. So many great humorous scenes - several I just had to read to my husband! I did not feel the detatchment to the parents as some readers described, but I got a clear picture of parent/child relations in the generation before me. And although I do not having siblings I grew up with, I did not feel alienated and was genuinely drawn into the friendship between them. Several parts had me in tears - and not just from laughing.
   
   I want my husband and his older brother (who are close) to read this - I think it will spark their memories of childhood.
   
   All in all, a fantastic book! For anyone - men and women alike, with or with out siblings, younger or older.... something for all.



4. I just finished this book this morning and I have to say it was just average. Having just come back from a trip with my own brother and being of similar age to the Sparks brothers, I connected with this book on some level, but not completly. For instance, they refer to each other as "Brother" or " Little Brother". I have never really heard brothers regularly refer to each other in that way. I also never realy connected with the family as a whole, so I wasn't vested in the loss of his father or mother as there was a sense of detachement for both throughout the book. His sister's struggle and ultimate death was hard to read due to my own relationship with my younger sister, so the last third of the book gripped me more than the first 2/3s.
   
   
   
   All in all, it is an average book. If I were to rate it, "Tuesday's with Morrie" was a 10 on a 10 point scale, the "Tender Bar" was a 9 while this book was an even 6.



5. After having 4 kids, most books would put me a sleep. I could not put this book down. What a great true life story about this fantastic author.

5 comments about The Invisible Wall: A Love Story That Broke Barriers.

1. My sister and mother raved about this book, so I finally decided to read it and boy, what a wonderful slice of life book that let's me get a real glimpse of poverty stricken family life in England in the early 1900's. I live close to Mr. Bernstein (down at the Jersey shore) and I hope that I will be able to meet him if he does a lecture locally. Please read this and also "The Dream". We think that THOSE were the "good old days", but really, for many people, they were tough times. Thank you Harry Bernstein for 2 wonderful books.



2. This book really evokes a time and place. The author eloquently transports the reader to a neighborhood full of memorable characters in Lancashire circa pre WWI. It will anger you, make you laugh, make you cry. It is a very powerful book.



3. This was a very beautifully told memoir with a surprising amount of detail and description. It was as much a story of the life Harry and his family lived as it was the love story between his sister and the non-Jewish boyfriend she loved. Lovely.



4. This is a really beautiful book. It's so remarkable that the author at what may be considered an advanced age can recreate the atmosphere of England in the early 1900s. Not since "how Green Is My Valley" have I become so immersed in a memoir. The portrait of his mother is lovingly done and your heart aches for her as she struggles. Be sure to follow it up with his sequel, "The Dream" as it, too, is so compelling. May Mr. Bernstein live many more years and continue writing.



5. I read this book in two days, only because I had to sleep sometime, otherwise I might have done it in one day. I then gave it to my mother, who is 84 years old, and she read it in two days as well. The way the author writes of such difficult circumstances in which he grew up, in such a simple and all-accepting way, is so pure and innocent that it speaks perfectly of the way a child sees his world. The author is not a newcomer on the scene, but I wish I had a lifetime of novels written by him, because his writing is that good. For anyone who loves a really good story without phony embellishment or unnecessary prose, this is a must read. It is just a remarkable book, and I cannot wait to read the next and the next and the next.

5 comments about Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic.

1. I live an hour away from Beech Creek, Alison Bechdel's tiny hometown and the setting for much of her graphic memoir Fun Home. I've always found the area oppressive: dark, looming mountains casting perpetual shadows on impoverished, dying valley towns. But after reading Fun Home, I revisited Beech Creek, to see Bechdel's childhood home and the grave of her father Bruce, and to remind myself of how cruelly ironic life can be.
   
   Bruce Bechdel, a man who loves literature (in his early days he identified with F. Scott Fitzgerald; in his final days he reads Proust), an aesthete with a taste for the baroque detail of the Victorian era, and a creative and versatile designer of interior and exterior landscapes, is born and lives in rural central Pennsylvania, running the family funeral home and teaching at the local high school. He never quite fits in. Always sun-tanned and exquisitely dressed (no plaid hunter's shirts or chewing tobacco for him), persnickety and a bit prissy, but at the same time speaking with a back-country twang, Bruce seems uncannily out of place in Beech Creek.
   
   And he's a closeted gay man, who has occasional affairs on the side and otherwise sublimates his repressed sexuality by obsessively restoring the Victorian-era house in which Alison grew up. The tension of his closeted life makes him aloof, prone to violent temper tantrums, controlling, and sometimes cruel to both wife and children.
   
   Alison's Bechdel's memoir of him, and the way in which her own identity both became the inverse of his and yet in many respects parallels his, is a sophisticated narrative that underscores just how complex personal identity is. Alison is who she is, just as her father was who he was, because of the convergence of Beech Creek, sexuality, alienation, fun, repression, the need to be creative, the yearning for affection, the factuality of history and the re-creation of memory. There's no formulaic happy ending here, no artificial structuring to make more sense of the relationship between herself and her father than there really was. Instead, what the reader is offered is a profound, sensitive, bittersweet effort to explore memory in search of identity--an effort which throughout is punctuated by Bechdel's references to both Proust and James Joyce--and an appreciation for the ironies of fate which make us who we become.
   
   Other reviewers have mentioned that they read the memoir at one setting. I found it so intense that I could only take it in small portions, and even then I sometimes felt overwhelmed. For in sharing her own identity-forming memories with us, she invites us to plumb more deeply into our own. And both exercises, although potentially liberating, can also be harrowing.



2. I knew she was a cartoonist but did not know the memoir would be in cartoon form. It was reasonably well written but her family members just didn't come alive for me.
   As a lesbian, I found it especially upsetting to read about yet another woman who felt like she had come home when she put on her father's clothes.



3. An absolutely brilliant, hard to put down and very moving story. I go back to it often and think about it always. Beautiful, witty, hilarious.



4. Perhaps it is inevitable that I'd fall for this book, given that I'm a fan of comics --Art Speigelman, Chris Ware, Lynda Barry, Megan Kelso, Gilbert & Jamie Hernandez... and of course Alison Bechdel, whose Dykes to Watch Out For strip I've followed for a long time. Compared to that strip, this book has a more gentle pace and wry wit. It says as much as written biographies in a surprisingly compact way. The ending disappointed some, but surely real life is harder than fiction to tie up in a tidy bow.



5. I cannot praise this graphic novel enough. I was so impressed with way Bechdel wove her memoir together, building from one memory into the next. At first I found some of her writing potentially pretentious, something I have seen in the writings of other memoirs where the author wants the reader to know how much they know, to be impressed with the use of precise vocubulary, and the manipulation of time to unfold a story. Usually, these don't work because they are not used effectively so much as for effect. Bechdel, however, has no pretense. Vulnerable and transparent, how she tells her personal story is so powerful it breaks your heart and inspires you soul all at the same time. Her use of the same image, with a slightly different perspective, is not merely clever but perfection. If I could beg her to write about her relationship with her mother, I would. But what would be the point? Then I would want to know more about her relationships with her siblings, with her lovers, with her neighbors. I could never have enough. It is enough to hope for more.